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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Feeling rather guilty now I have time to reflect on the hell of the school run this morning.

11 replies

sandyballs · 03/10/2008 10:28

I have twin girls who are 7. One is quite organised and mostly sorts herself out each morning, the other is a dreamy vague child who needs everything spelling out a thousand times and jigging along at every stage. It's wearing and exhausting and this morning I lost it and started shouting and stomping about and said 'You're both a bloody pain in the arse, do you know that' . Even to DD2 and the only thing she did was request a different drink in her bottle .

Can't believe I shouted that at them and feel terrible that they're at school all day and I'm sitting here thinking what a shite parent I am and how bloody difficult this parenting lark is. Why didn't friends warn before I got pregnant.

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Dropdeadfred · 03/10/2008 10:30

Make sure you're cheerful tonight ( and maybe whisper an apology to dd2 on the quiet)

junkcollector · 03/10/2008 10:36

I wouldn't worry. Seeing your parents losing it is part of childhood too.

Know how you feel though I started screaming this morning cos DS1 forgot his PE bag. I was only locking the front door! We hadn't exactly got far!

OrmIrian · 03/10/2008 10:39

Say sorry when you see her. I guarantee she will have forgotten it anyway.

I've said that sort of thing before now, and it's not usually about anything particularly bad more the culmination of lots of other irritating things. Anyway she does need to learn that mornings are about getting on with it and co-operating, not faffing around.

I hate school mornings.

cupsoftea · 03/10/2008 10:47

Wouldn't mention anything to her but would let her chose the biscuits or something like that

Hassled · 03/10/2008 10:50

I think that realising your parents are only human and have breaking points and bad days etc is an important part of growing up - and is the time when children start realising the world doesn't actually revolve around them, and start being a bit more in tune with other people's moods and feelings.

SO stop with the guilt - you are teaching them important life skills .

cookinmama · 03/10/2008 10:52

I eventually made a pact with myself that I wouldn't argue with DS in the mornings because of the way it left both of us feeling (he is also a bit of a dreamy child who needs reminder 100 times). But what I always realised was that I would beat myself up about it all day and he had forgotten it as soon as he got to school. So don't be too hard on yourself, we are all human and have are off moments and luckily our children see past those moments and do not judge us or hold it against us (at that age!!)

Ellbell · 03/10/2008 10:58

Hey, at least you remembered the school run. Me and dh were sitting at the table discussing where we'd like to live when we retire (in 25 years' time...), when we realised it was 8.45 and no-one had teeth cleaned, shoes on, bags ready etc.

Seriously, though, don't beat yourself up about it. It's so easy to get wound up by our kids. I'm sure most of us on here have snapped every day at 8.30 occasionally. (And I am also the lucky mother of a wonderful, beautiful, frustrating dreamer...). Have some chocolate/cake/nice cup of tea now, and just give them a big hug when you see them tonight.

FranSanDisco · 03/10/2008 11:05

Well you are making me feel like a shitty stick of a mother as I shout at least 3 times a week . Ds 6 yo, is the very worst. I am not kidding, but this morning I found him at 8.30 back in bed with dh's ipod plugged into his head! I had sent him up to brush teeth and GET DRESSED after breakfast. Then on passing the bathroom dd 8 yo was wearing a shirt that looked as though she'd slept in it. There are ironed ones in the cupboard fgs. I'm considering boarding school or maybe prison (for me) to avoid these mornings.

OrmIrian · 03/10/2008 11:26

Actually DH made me feel better about my morning behaviours today. He's started a new job that means he is there in the mornings. Today he got our of bed a bit late and cross. Reduced the youngest 2 to tears within 2 mins.... And wouldn't bugger off and let me sort it out. Sometimes he's such an arse.

Original poster

sandyballs · 03/10/2008 22:10

Thanks for all your replies, I had to dash out this morning so have only just got back online.

I do think that losing it makes me feel a lot worse than them. They do seem to forget it once at school, but I still need to try and stay calm wth them, it doesn't seem to help things if i'm stomping!

Thank god it's Sat tomorrow!!

OP posts:

coochybottom · 03/10/2008 22:25

I have twin boys and have lost count of the times I have said things in the heat of the moment and regreted it.Afterwards on reflection I have been able to see things from their point of view and felt bad. When I feel this way I will apologise and explain why and make a special effort to do something nice like colouring/puzzles/a game together. Having said that,sometimes they have pushed me to the limit on purpose and then I dont feel guilty!Twins do so like to gang up on you!!!

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