My 5 year old boy wont join in group activities at School.

[charmedmum]

My 5 year old boy on the outside comes across as a very confident person. He talks for England and is very well spoken for a 5 year old. But at School he seems to struggle with the whole concept of joining in with classroom activities. I cannot decide if it bores him or he finds it hard because at home sometimes after a great fuss he will do the things that the group activities are asking of him, albeit on a one to one. I have tried to talk to him and he even has a reward scheme in place to try and encourage him to join in. I am worried he will get behind if we don't find an answer.

Can anybody help??

I am sure there are parents with more of an idea but I do know that children often demonstrate thier extroversion or introversion as thier first trait. This does not mean they can or cannot socialise but the extent to which they get energised by company or thier own world.

He sounds like he has a rich internal world and this is where he is most comfy but is perfectly capable of socialising when he wants to.

If he is happy to do both and it does not make him unhappy it could be that you are more of an extrovert and therefore expect him to behave in a certain way.

I wonder if there are any activities he could start with class mates where he can do both which may help him when he is in a classroom setting?

The other thing is that I have to say boys generally find it harder to concentrate for long periods of time. You could try something like a football school or similar at the weekends.

My DS1 was like this - he's a real watcher, or a sponge. He likes to watch and watch until he's confident he can do it, before having a go himself. Now at 7 though, he's much more prepared to try.

I'd back off and leave him to sort it out himself TBH.

Ah yes - one teacher also made the point that kids learn just as much by watching!