do your similar age dcs get treated the same? or do older ones get some extras?

[hatwoman]

without really thinking about it all we've tended towards treating dds (8 and 6) the same, rather than making particular age-related concessions. put together with the fact that dd2's a loud little beggar I think dd1 sometimes gets/feels a bit eclipsed. so...I took a decision to let dd1 (now 8) have a few riding lessons. upsuprisingly dd2 thinks this is the biggest injustice ever. I have told her it's perfectly fair - they are both to be treated the same - they both get lessons at 8. I have also told her (truthfully) that the riding school doesn't do "proper" lessons for 6 year olds. (but she knows they do what I believe are called rein lessons). I think I am judging a particular situation and the particular characters involved to give one dd the bit extra that I really think she needs. but I'm interested to know to what extent other people give their older dcs a bit extra...

My mum always treated me and my younger sister the same. There's 3 years difference. We got same pocket money, same bedtime (until I was old enough to go to bed without the need to be tucked in). I clearly recall wanting to get my ears pierced and mum told me I had to wait until I was 13. So... on my 13th birthday I got my ears pierced.... and so did my sister, who was still 9 - she turned 10 a few weeks later. Not fair!

Sometimes it is easier to treat the same, but overall I think it is necessary to make a difference according to age.

Good Luck!