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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

11 Month old refusing to eat his dinner, anyone who can help???

21 replies

wozzle1 · 13/02/2005 16:16

Hi all Mumsnetters..I need your help!!!

My 11 month old Son has just started to have tantrums and is refusing to eat his dinner.
If he does take it he will spit it out or put it in his hands and throw it.
I had tryed to let him feed himself but that was a disaster.

My mum has just introduced him to Milkybars and he loves them. Im just worried that he would prefer them to his dinner.

Any advise????

a desperate Wozzle.

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MunchedTooManyMarsLady · 13/02/2005 16:21

Firstly I'd put away all the milkybars. He doesn't need these and will survive without. As to the tantrums, not too sure. What I would do I think is provide simple finger foods. A lot of root veg, maybe some little sausages, toast, eggy bread etc. Not sure if that will help. I've also found that ignoring tantrums completely tends to end them. No point in tantrums if no response (well that works for us). The DTs had a short spell of refusing to eat and both of them can tantrum for England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales. hth

Cod · 13/02/2005 16:23

Message withdrawn

dancer77 · 13/02/2005 16:46

Ds 13 months has been through this, probably was about the same age. He has bouts of it now he'll go for about 3 days and hardly eat anything and throw on the floor anything he doesn't want. He thinks it's funny too! I do tend to give him fingerfoods when he's in this mood like toast, rice cakes, fruit - I'm quite lucky he does like most fruit so he has quite a variety. It was about 11 months he started wanting to feed himself. We compromised and held the spoon together that way he felt that he was actually doing it. I then let him play with the yoghurt pot and spoon when it was empty. Also another thing i've found is to distract him at meals. Sometimes he will have some toys on his tray and he doesn't even realise he's eating! Baby wipes are the favourite though, bit expensive as he likes to pull them all out, but if i get dinner down him i really don't care!
He probably does want to eat milkybars but if he realises he's not getting them if he doesn't eat his dinner it might do the trick.

handlemecarefully · 14/02/2005 10:41

Well no doubt you will find this happens from time to time and will improve for a bit and then recurr again.

IME they tend to go through phases when they are off their food for a while and for no apparent reason. Although I think sometimes it might be linked to teething.

He will probably start eating his meals with gusto again in the next few days. I know that this happens with my 2 (2.7 and 0.10).

However, I second what Mars lady says...try more finger food so that he can attempt to feed himself. Some babies just rebel against being spoon fed.

Newbarnsleygirl · 14/02/2005 10:48

Agree with what everyone is saying.

Hv told me when dd was doing this that it was a phase, pushing boundaries etc and also she had been given alot of sweet things during the day.

We cut out all the snacks and if she ate her dinner she could have something sweet after but she would have fruit as well and this would only be one meal a day. Also if she threw the food on the floor I was told not to make a fuss, don't say anything and take the food away.

Other give things you could try is to give him his own spoon while you feed him and why not make your own soup and put it in a cup for him to drink. An easy way of getting the good stuff!

Original poster

wozzle1 · 14/02/2005 11:37

Thanks for all the advise.....

Iam going to try a few tips today.

He really likes finger foods, esp banana, toast and rusks.
I think he is coming to that stage where like you all said that he wants to feed himself.
Its hard to realise that he is growing up now, and is not just a baby.

Cod-he is drinking 3 8oz bottles a day. Morning, lunchtime and before bed.

Thanks guys! I will let you know how I get on.

Wozzle 1

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Original poster

wozzle1 · 14/02/2005 16:00

Well, dinner didnt go quite well. My carpet got covered (even with a sheet down!)

Rang HV, she said pretty much what you guys said.
Oh well, just have to keep going.

Thanks Guys!

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Chuffed · 14/02/2005 16:14

Is the lunchtime bottle before lunch? Can you move it forward to early afternoon like 2ish he might be more hungry at lunch time.

we have this every now and again with dd (10.5mths). It is total guess work as to what she feels like on each day. We normally try some finger food - we cut off about an inch of corn on the cob last and she hacked away at it for ages. Then we give her a bit of spoon feeding in between. We always get a mess too but I just figure that she doesn't always feel like what I have given her - don't let it stress you out.

Original poster

wozzle1 · 14/02/2005 18:46

Chuffed...

I give him his bottle at around 12-12.30 ish and then his dinner around 15.30.

What I might do is still give him his lunchtime bottle and then give him a sandwich around 15-15.30 with a piece of fruit and then give him his dinner when we eat, which is about 6pm.

Its so difficult to know what to do, i just keep thinking will he lose alot of weight? Will the hv think there is something wrong?
I think Im just paranoid, or maybe just a parent.

Wozzle

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Fastasleep · 14/02/2005 18:57

I have a son exactly the same age and he is so tantrumy! He'll wiggle and scream and pull his food out and spit and bite... The only thing that has worked for me so far is to keep his food varied, and to have the same kind of thing as him at the same time...If he starts up with the whining I push his highchair away from me and sit in front of him 'happily' eating mine 'yuuuum!' and then if he gets really bad after I offer him the food again I'll feed him from my plate/bowl but I'm a complete health food obsessive with mine, he's only had one chocolate button in his life! ... He gets three meals a day with some fruit snacks in between (which he always happily eats and smears all over the floor!)

Fastasleep · 14/02/2005 18:59

Ooh yes mine always has his own spoon, and a neat little trick which works for me is to look at his empty spoon hungrily and go 'AH AH pleeeeease' and put it in my mouth, chomp on it while going 'yuuuuuuum' and then slip his food in while he's giggling.....only works if you're feeling energetic though!

Fennel · 14/02/2005 19:31

he won't lose weight, especially if he's still guzzling 3x8oz bottles of milk. toddlers often eat far less than babies, they are starting to grow slower at this age.

I read once (maybe on mumsnet) that the average toddler eats about 1 proper meal every 2 days, and maybe has about 7 tablespoons of food a day. not a lot really, so don't worry.

dd3, 9.5 months, loves feeding herself, she is getting quite good at it, healthy things she likes corn on the cob, single peas, broccoli spears, bread with things smeared on, pasta twirls, shreddies, bits of baked potato, bits of satsuma.

oooggs · 14/02/2005 19:54

at 11 mths DS was having 5oz morning milk & milk on cereal, lunch 12.30pm and tea 4.30pm and 8 - 12oz of milk at 6.30pm.

Does he need milk during the day? Is it curbing his appetite? Try lunch before midday milk so he is hungry at lunchtime. Or more milk to 2pm.

HTH

MunchedTooManyMarsLady · 14/02/2005 20:16

fastasleep is he your first? My first didn't touch sugar until he was about 2.5yrs. My second at about 1.5yrs, my third from birth. The DTs were probably conceived in sugar lol

Fastasleep · 15/02/2005 09:08

Oh yeah he's my first - I have no hope for future children not touching sugar lol

Original poster

wozzle1 · 15/02/2005 14:15

Thanks for the good advise...

Im just about to give him a jam sandwich with some fruit and then at t-time he can have some pasta, cheese and chicken.
Before bed I will give him his bottle as this seems to send him into sleepyland.

I just cant believe that at only 11 months he has started to have tantrums, I thought they only started at two! How silly am i! lol.
I think he has his fathers attitude!!

wozzle

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Original poster

wozzle1 · 15/02/2005 16:42

Good news, ds finally ate his lunch and all of it!!
Gave him a sandwich with a piece of fruit and he seemed to really enjoy it...roll on dinnertime.
Hopefully he will enjoy what I give him again.

Wozzle

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Fennel · 15/02/2005 20:36

wozzle - dd2 started tantrumming at 10 months. I thought maybe she was hitting toddlerdom early and would finish it early. Hah! now at 3.5 she's just about ending the regular tantrums.

dd3 age 9.5 months doesn't have any sugar or choc. I am enjoying her being too young to really mind. I am also enjoying this baby stage when she still thinks vegetables are a treat.

handlemecarefully · 16/02/2005 09:06

Wozzle - there are tantrums and then there are tantrums. I thought that my dd had started her tantrums early (around 1 year old), but now realise that those were only warm ups for the 40 minute long screaming, crying, kicking rages that she had finessed by the time she was 2 !

Original poster

wozzle1 · 16/02/2005 20:13

I really dont know what to expect when it comes to tantrums...I think now is bad, what am I going to be like when he has a full blown one!!!
Anything like my husbands and I should be ok...u know what men are like!!

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Hayls · 16/02/2005 20:21

Know the feeling about tantrums- my 1yo goes through phases of them. WRT to food, the best advice I was given was to ignore them when they're chucking food over the highchair or screaming for you tot ake it out of thier hands. I used to react immediately and say don't be silly, eat it up, look at the lovely food etc and dd realised she got loads of attention for it. NOw I just pick the food back up and only give her good attention when she is eating properly. not 100% foolproof but definitely helped
(now just have to admit that it was dh who gave me that advice having watched countless battles...mummies are always right aren#t they?)

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