Development paranoia...Am I going mad?

[Sareyggs]

My 15 month old son has been slow to reach certain milestones i.e he didn't sit up until 8 and 1/2 months, didn't crawl until 13 months, has just started to pull himself up at 15 months.

The verbal side has also taken its time. He doesn't say much apart from quack quack, moo ( bizarrely) and occasionally dada. Finally he rarely points and doesn't wave hello or goodbye. Is this all normal? I am starting to convince myself there is something more serious ie autism but my family think I am insane...am I?

have you spoken to your HV or GP? Was he prem at all? My DT's were 11 weeks early and starting sitting at 8 months ish, crawling, gosh, before they were one, and walking about 15 months I guess.

Every baby is different, i've met full termers that were behind my two, but are still fine now and caught up. Is your lo a bum shuffler, have heard they can be later walkers as they find it easier to bum shuffle.

as for pointing and waving hello, do you encourage it? My sisters lo, points at EVERYTHING and he's just over one, my two were not fussed by pointing, were more in a hurry to get to whatever they wanted before the other one got it!

Pointing is supposed to develop by around 18mths or so, so there's still a while to go yet.

I'm no expert on developmental milestones but the things you have mentioned so far all sound as though they're in the range of normal. Dd has no SN (her 2 brothers both have autism) and sat up/pulled herself up at around the same ages as your ds and never bothered to crawl at all.

If you are worried though, it might be worth talking to your HV if they're approachable.

I have only 1 ds but from what i have seen/heard with friends dc's children do things at such different rates.One frind's ds said virtualy nothing until recenlt (he's nearyl 2) and now you can't keepp him quiet!
What about his non-verbal communication...eye contact, understanding of what's being said, sense of humour, interest in others?
If you're really concerned make apt with your Gp but i'm sure you're just being a concerned loving mother and worrying over nothing like us all!

Thanks v much for advice so far. DS was not premature but was in special care due to problems at delivery and required major resuscitation, I guess thats why i'm so paranoid. He has routine visits with a paedeatrician and so far she has said he is within the normal boundaries, although we have to go back at 16 months. My HV is not very good so i don't bother with her. I just wish I could stop worrying and enjoy him more. In answer to Tamdin's question he does have good eye contact, a wicked sense of humour and seems to understand a number of things, he also loves other kids...maybe I should concentrate on the positives x

It's so difficult not to keep comparing and there is such a heavy emphasis placed on 'warning signs'. My DD1 was 7 weeks early and she was a slow developer - but even knowing that was to be expected I still worry about things.

At 20 months she doesn't point - but waves, has sense of humour, fab eye contact, brilliant understanding and a smattering of words....but the lack of pointing still freaks me out! If it's any consolation my family think I'm mad too I saw a foot specialist with DD1 last week and he said it was in the range of 'normal' not to walk until 2...so you've got bags of time.

We have a paediatrician appointment in a couple of weeks and I'm going to see what he says....but daren't go to HV - as they all seem quite bonkers here!! Why not see gp anyway - reckon it can't hurt.

Thanks I might try the GP as well as I have a month to wait for the paed appointment. Do you find your GP helpful though? I went a number of times during DS's first year and stopped as they made me feel like I was wasting their time. In saying that the HV did take my concerns seriously at 9 months, but so much so she scared me to death and her bedside manner was appalling. Jeanjeannie does your DD1 now walk? Thanks for making me feel like I am not alone with my worries x

Trust your instincts. And if you are worried then follow through your concerns, don't let anyone make you think you are paranoid.

I'd kind of agree that it all sounds within the normal boundies. My two have both been talkers rather than movers - neither walked til 18 mths, and ds didn't bother crawling much either, so was pretty much immobile until 18mths (bliss in retrospect!)
Sitting up at 8.5 also doesn't sound that unusual to me- babies are sitting later now that we put them to sleep on their backs. DS was 9 mths before he sat reliably (although he was 4 weeks early).

As I say, my two talked the hind legs off passing donkeys, but his language doesn't sound unusual to me. And DS always thought waving an immense waste of his time

I'd say the key thing is that he IS starting to talk. Do you feel he understands most things/can you easily interact with him on a day to day basis?

If you know & trust your paed, I'd personally be tempted to wait & talk to him/her - they know your child and will be much more authoritative than a GP (no offense to GPs, but they aren't child development specialists, necessarily)

That sounds exactly like my ds at 15 months (without the words). He has always been behind his peers - he was 6 weeks early but has always seemed more than 6 weeks behind. I put it down to him being very poorly at birth and so taking a little longer to "get going". Maybe the same for your ds? Of course he might have just been slow anyway! He always catches up in the end so I tend not to worry - I just look at my friends' toddlers and think "oh, ds will be doing that in 2 or 3 months".

For the record he sat up at 8 months ish, crawled at 13 months, walked at 14 months and didn't say anything at all until about 18 months - he is 2 on Saturday and has had a major explosion in the last month to about 100 words, but before that it was just a handful.

Your ds sounds completely normal to me but I am no expert . Am sure it will do no harm to get him checked if you are worried.

Yes, DD1 now walks - only a month ago, so just 20 months. She literally just got up while we were watching telly one evening.. and walked perfectly over to the cat to annoy it We were stunned! She knee walked before that. Only been a month...but other things seem to have developed - she seems to have more confidence with other kids now and she's more curious. There's a pic of her on my profile just 2 days after she began to walk...and you can see she's running!!

I'm still worried re pointing and will take it up with paed...but I don't have any 'instinct' that there is something very wrong. If there is then I'd rather deal with it early and knowing wont change things - just make me more able to get help/advice early.

The language sounds okay for 15 months, the pointing could come with time. Is he okay about responding to his name and does he reach to you to be picked up? Pointing is not the acid test ( and there isn't one). My son does have a developmental disorder and he has always pointed. You have to look at the whole picture and you need an expert to help you do that.