I left a message for HV to call me 10 days ago and have heard nothing ... DS's fear of pooing

[MumWith2Boys]

1. I don't think I've ever rung the HV for help in nearly 5 years so you'd think she'd ring me back ...

1. DS2 aged 2.2 has developed a fear of pooing and goes nuts when one is brewing saying it hurts, holding himself. He's not constipated so I don't believe it is hurting. IMHO I think he's just becoming aware of the sensations. So question is - should I start potty training (oh god, was going to wait at least another few months) or should we get over this latest episode before even thinking of taking his nappy off?

Any opinions? The "episodes" can last anything up to 2 hours and it's driving me nuts. Even his big brother ends up yelling "JUST GET THE POO OUT"

Does he maybe have a wee tear or fissure in his anus?

(I do and it does bring a tear to the eye, lol)

Hi! I remember my dd (now age 7) going through this phase at around the same age - went on for quite a while I think.

You may find that feeling and seeing a poo dropping into the potty makes things worse at the moment. We used to just hold dd's hands and gently reassure her when we know she needed to 'go'. We also used to show her the poo in the nappy and 'discuss' it, lol.

Eventually the fear did pass and a couple of months later, she did potty train and took great delight in being an amateur poo analyser..................

Most people wait for summer to potty train. Why would you wait for several more months?

My dd goes through this every now and then.
She just tells me that shes scared of going.

I end up having to sit with her while she does it.
After a few days it goes again and shes quite happy about it.

I have noitced that she sings or talks to herself when she goes though.

Thanks everyone

CDA - he's only 2.2. I toilet trained DS1 at 2.7 and it was easy. Just think it's a bit early - his speech isn't that great.

I'm hoping this is a phase and nothing more serious. Fingers crossed. How would I know if he had a fissure? Can you see it?

when i worked in the nursery lots of children felt like this apparently psychologist liken it to losing a part of you so as a child poops its almost like hes pooping himself away ....a little dab of germolene will numb the area a diet rich in soft fruits will siften poop and generally being open about poo doing poopy dances singing poopy songs etc etc it might help if you hold a nappy to his bottom as he poops so he can feel the security that hes not going to pass a huge thing?

My ds went through that. I gave him lactulose which helped to soften it so that he didn't feel any discomfort when he went. Lots of fluids to keep him regular.

I agree with cornsilk - if you give him something to loosen it up a little then it won't hurt.

It's unusual for a 2 year old to say it hurts so I would believe him?

Fissures hurt like hell!

If you have a fissure does it hurt all the time or just when you poo? He doesn't complain when he's actually doing the poo, it's the build up to it that causes the drama. That's why I don't think it does really hurt - I thought if there was something wrong then it'd be the actual passing of it that would be painful.

Thanks for all your ideas.

I don't know about "soft fruits soften poop". Bananas constipate, for example.

Feed him cooked green vegetables for a soft stool.

If he doesn't cry out as he is passing the poo, it is not an anal fissure. Fissure feels like you are passing glass when pooping.

peaches,pears plums etc are all good examples of soft fruit that will soften poop and encourage healthy bowel movement-fgs jump on me for the one fruit that is commonly know to 'bind things up'

Thanks again

I spoke to a pharmacist today and she thinks it's psychological and not a fissure