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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Pushchair refusenik

16 replies

susiemj · 02/06/2008 15:40

My little DD (5 months old) has got very used to being in her sling but I'd like to start using the pushchair sometimes. The problem is is that she hates it. She can be fine for 5-10 minutes but she always ends up twisting and screaming. She seems quite comfortable at first, and likes to be right upright but it always ends up with me taking her out and carrying her.

Is there any way I can get around this or get her used to it.

PRobably not taking her out would be a good start, eh?

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MrsBadger · 02/06/2008 15:47

what kind of pushchair is it? facing you or away / reclined or v upright?

migth be worth trying her in some different types (ask your mates ) and maybe getting a different one (ebay, second hand etc) if that's the problem

Original poster

susiemj · 02/06/2008 16:00

It pretty much does what you want it to do - upright, flat, back and front facing.

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MrsBadger · 02/06/2008 16:02

and she hates it in every configuration?

Original poster

susiemj · 02/06/2008 16:04

Pretty much. She likes it best facing me and upright, but she only takes it for a few minutes at a time.

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mrsgboring · 02/06/2008 16:04

My DS hated his and I gave up and continued to sling (IME you go through periods where you think no, can't do it any more, child too heavy and then a few weeks later it's all hunky dory again)

I think part of the problem for DS was that his bum would start to slump down into the seat, so maybe you could try propping DD up with something to stop this happening.

If you can wait a little while longer till she's established on finger food, you could try food in pushchair.

mrsgboring · 02/06/2008 16:05

That clueless was of course directed at me, not you

IwansMam · 02/06/2008 16:20

DS hated his pushchair between about 3 and 8 months. Only used it when he needed to sleep while out and about. Always had the sling handy. One day, I realised that he'd woken up from a nap and wasn't whining to be out. I think that went through some development milestone at this stage. Since then, he's happily gone in the pushchair.

I'm sure it won't last (he likes to prove me wrong), but he's now 11 months and gets really excited when he goes in it now (he likes going out).

Meandmyjoe · 02/06/2008 16:32

ooo big sympathy from a fellow mummy of a push chair hater. It's easier said than done not taking them out so don't think that it's your fault! My ds is 9 months and is still a terror when it comes to the pushchair. I've tried borrowing friend's oes to see if the different positions makes a difference, it didn't! I have bought 2 different push chairs and a pram all of which he hated. I think he just doesn't like to be down and not part of the action, he always wants to be up at our level and nosing around! It's hard cos it means I am housebound sometimes as he hates going in the car too. I rely heavily on the sling and now he is older can sometimes get him to go for about 30 mins in the pushchair facing me if I give him loads of toys and a snack to distract him for a bit! I have no suggestions really, it's a tricky one! It's particularly hard when you see everyone elses babies so happy to be in their pram or buggy but it will pass. They'll walk one day (that's the only shread of hope I can offer, sorry!)

Original poster

susiemj · 02/06/2008 16:46

I know - I walk round town looking at all these contented little souls in their pushchairs and wondering what I did wrong. Too much sling? Clingy baby? Too dependent?

Mine hates the carseat too.

From what you say Meandmyjoe, your DS is an active LO like my DD. She always has to be able to see everything.

Iwnasmum - you give me hope!

I'll try propping her up mrsg.

So no one advocates just making her stay in there no mater what? I do wonder if she would eventually get used to it. I haven't been able to bring myself to leave her more than really quite a short while.

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mrsgboring · 02/06/2008 18:21

Would also like to ask, Why are you so keen to give up on the slinging? A slung baby is completely portable, and if you have any kind of public transport, you can learn to use it, plan journeys round it and avoid all the hated baby contraptions.

They'll probably grow out of pushchair hating before they can walk everywhere, but my DS is 2.6 and one of the best walkers I know because it's far far easier to get them to walk if you don't have a buggy to wrestle with when LO wants to get down and have a little toddle.

I definitely wouldn't leave your DD to scream, susie As I say, we went down the sling and ditch the pram option. Your DD is not too clingy and "pushchair" isn't a developmental stage.

Original poster

susiemj · 02/06/2008 18:25

Only really because it's a bit hot in the warm weather - for me if not for her. There will also come a point when she'll be heavy to carry. The sling is supposed to go to 25lbs, but I don't think I can.

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madmouse · 02/06/2008 20:52

Susie dh has carried nathan so much he is not always impressed with pushchair now. I use the same trick as I use with bed, basically baby whisperer technique: When he gets really worked up, pick him up, pat his back, when he is calm put him back. worked for me.

mrsgboring · 02/06/2008 21:47

What sling do you use? Some slings work better than others.

I am about thepuniest person you could meet and I can carry a 15kg toddler on my front no problem in the right carrier. Up to 18 months I could carry all day for a day out in London and carry all the stuff needed for an overnight too.

It might be worth looking at slinging options just to give yourself some choices, and in case you can't get your DD to like her buggy.

Meandmyjoe · 03/06/2008 07:04

You're right they do sound similar susiemj! Only recently (since saturday!) have I braved going out with him in the pushchair. I find he still grizzles on and off and deffinitely would rather be carried but he's 26lbs now and I find it very hard to carry him as it's up hill to all the places I want to go (typical!). I think he's at the age now where he needs to learn that mummy isn't going to carry him all the time. He's not really that keen on the sling when I'm on public transport either as I sit down with him and he feels too restricted by it. He's always prefered me to stand which is not always conveinient or comfortable!

I think at the age your dd is then letting her scream probably won't teach her to 'like' the pushchair, it may make her hate it even more so I would just go with the flow for now and use the sling as much as you can. When ,y ds was 5 months, he refused to even go in the pram/ pushchair and would scream inconsolably ALL the time he was in it, which was no good for him or me! It's not as bad now as I can distract him with LOADS of toys and snacks (sometimes!!!)

As for the car, I have to leave him to cry I'm afraid as there is no other safe option. I tend to time longer journeys (ie more than 10 minutes!) with his naps and then just pray he doesn't wake up on the way! Thankfully he sleeps fairly well in the car but as soon as he wakes up he sobs to come out

It's hard cos it makes you feel like you can't go anywhere and being stuck in the house is torturous sometimes but I'm sure it will pass, eventually! I'm hoping that when my ds crawls properly (still can't crawl for more then a few shuffles before he starts going backwards!) then he may become less frustrated and may chill out a bit. Fingers crossed eh?!

dylsmum1998 · 03/06/2008 10:37

hi my dd was like this, always hated the pram so i had her in the sling, when she was smaller one of the tomy ones which they can either face you or face out. then when she was a year old and too heavy for that one i got a freedom sling and have used that since.
i did find tht once she was 8 months and could walk holding onto things it got easier as she like to hold one side of the pushchair and one of my hands ( i used the other to push pushchair) she would toddle along- very slow going but soo much happier with doing this.
she's now 2 and still doesnt like the pushchair, will go in it to sleep and thats it. i still take it shopping etc as its handy to put the shopping in whilst she toddles. i still use the sling occasionally to, if we're going out for the day, especially if going to london as i can put her in the sling and still have a hand to keep hold of ds on undergorund etc.
i think this does help as she's quite a smalll little thing 23lb 10oz last weigh in.
don't think i would have managed this had she been built like my ds at this age he was heavier than she is now at a year old!

so no magic cure just tonnes of sympathy, i really wouldnt put lo in to just scream i think as someone else said it will make them more determined not to get in.

Original poster

susiemj · 03/06/2008 16:56

Thanks for your replies.

I think I'll just try walking her up and down our street once a day and hopefully she'll get to like it. And I'll try the baby whisperer thing when I do it.

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