DD is 13 and I am an a inch a way from giving her the first smack of her life.

[pantiesandsussies]

I won't, but by the christ I want to. I understand that at 13 hormones are raging, but the attitude is driving me demented, truly there is only so long you can bite your tongue. and breathe

And breathe...

They know how to push buttons reallly well by this age, don't they? Mine turned 13 about 3 weeks ago.

Say calmly: "If you cannot behave like a human being, kindly go to your room and stay there until you can". And then lock yourself in somewhere with a bottle of wine.

Would compiling a list of verbal bribes & threats in your head that you can pluck out at a moments notice be of any use?

I like the wine, and the threats/bribes idea both sound good, but I told to go to her room in the end. Tonight was because I tripped over HER shoes (which I was less than impressed by, did I manage to say a bloody word about that though, oh no, the 'conversation' was all hers!) and tomorrow will probably be something equally bizarre. God were we ever this cranky, our mams are probably laughing on their faces right now.

Oh, I completely understand this. Never ever lifted a finger to dd when wee, was always in control with other strategies. However when she hit 13, I have been so tempted many a time. Now we work on the removal of her gadgets- phone, laptop, ipod, which is far more effective. And you're right- it's the trivial things which grow into bigger issues- bags left all over the place, dirty washing/glasses etc, answering back- so! is a big favourite. She is 14 now and I think we've got a few more years, according to sil!

You should our hall at the moment, courtesy of 14 yr old son and his Ten Tors kit. Asked him about 5-6 times to clear it up yesterday (he was off and at home all day with nasty cough). His solution was to pack it ll into his dark coloured rucksack and leave the whole rucksack in the middle of the floor in the dark for me to trip over at 5am.

duchesse I bet you were happy, are you ok?
It's go to othe point that I stay out of her way until I have had a cup of tea, I can't deal with hair issues until then.

Same with ds who will be 14 thursday.the attitude either makes me laugh or cry there is no middle ground.Bite your tongue ita all we can do until they come back in a few years!

trouble is she'd smack you right back

I woke up on the morning of my 13th birthday and knew all teachers and parents and general grown-ups talked utter tosh.

And that no-one understood me.

I fully expect dd to do exactly the same in 2 years time.

true cammelia, I really understand that she hates the world and the world hates her, We have all been there, felt the angst and listened to morrisey. But I do no think I'll have a tongue left by the time she is human again. How the heck people with 4 or more kids cope I'll never know.

I think that's easier p, I am one of 4 children, my mother just ignored all of us