Overweight 10 Year Old "obsessed" with food!!

[Amandella]

My 10 year old dd is constantly hungry (or says she is), plans each meal ahead of time, constantly asks for snacks and treats and literally rarely an hour goes by when she's not saying she's hungry or is talking about food and asking for it! I'm quite worried because I am overweight, despite being really skinny as a child, and I am worried she may end up the same. She's very tall for her age - she takes clothes about 1-2 years older than she is although they tend to be slightly loose around the stomach - but she needs the height. I'd say that she's slightly overweight, particularly around her waist and she does have a tendancy to put weight on when we go on holiday and she's allowed more treats. I am really sensible abour her diet - she always eats 5 portions of fruit/veg a day, she has a lunchbox in which I put a sandwich, yogurt, one or two pieces of fruit and sometimes a cereal bar or similar. She eats a normal breakfast - porridge or toast and she only drinks water or juice. She has a cooked dinner every evening and is only allowed fruit or yogurt for pudding except at the weekends when she has more treats. Having said this, she goes to lots of friends' houses for tea/play and sleepovers and given the opportunity away from home, she eats constantly - crisps, sweets, popcorn - anything she can get her hands on. She just can't say no and doesn't seem to know when to stop. I think she has plenty of exercise - walking to school each day, swimming and netball clubs as well as school sports. However, she's definitely slightly overweight, despite my best efforts and she's naturally lazy (her words!!)...and whilst she loves sports when she gets there, I do have to drag her off the sofa if she's not occupied as she'd happily lie around and watch TV given the chance.
Frankly, I'm exhausted trying to keep on top of her diet and keep her motivated with the exercise. I've lost 2.5 stones myself and I have changed my habits and I am desperate to make sure that she doesn't end up like I did.... but what more can I do??
Sorry for the rant but I'm at the end of my tether....My big worry is when she goes to her next school where she'll have lunch vouchers and will be able to choose her own food - I will not be able to do anything about what she eats then!! Help!!

She doesn't sound like she's that overweight from what you say. You seem to be doing all the right things.

I think I sound more anxious because I've written down all my concerns - re-reading it, I sound a bit paranoid!! I am not really - I try to be relaxed about this and don't go on and on about it..but secretly I can't help worrying.

Well done on losing the weight! Anyway, you seem to have a good attitude towards food and making sure she gets five portions of fruit and veg. Maybe she is genunely hungry though, I always have had a huge appitite from being around that age too. I am fairly tall too. Maybe try substituting some of the crisps with the walkers baked ones instead of fried. Sounds like she eats a very good diet though so maybe try and increase her activity levels a bit, perhaps walking with her or something and make out to her that it's to maintain your own weight. She doesn't sound overweight though, just big as she is tall aswell. I wouldn't worry though, you don't want her to become worried or obssessed. She sounds fine but I'd definately try and keep lots of healthy snacks and less of the tastier unhealthier ones!

Does she think she's overweight?

Have you tried to talk to her about the health implications of eating too much junk? Focus on health rather than weight so as not to shame her.

Also look at the size of the portions she eats at mealtimes maybe.

Wise words from you all! Firstly, yes, I do think she's slightly overweight. You don't look at her and think "wow, she's fat"... but I think she holds weight around her stomach like I do - and she definitely has trouble doing up trousers. Her arms/legs/face look just fine but I guess I'm worried about the fact that even though I know she's eating well, and I know she's doing exercise, she's STILL overweight. I also have a younger dd - who is only 4 - but as skinny as they come, not at all interested in food and I really struggle to get her to eat anything except pasta and bananas! I realise I'm more concerned that most parents perhaps because of my own issues but my dh's sister is really obese - and his mother has been terribly mean to her over the years going on and on about her weight. I've made an absolute conscious effort NOT to do this to my dd. She's health conscious herself - freely admits that food is her biggest passion - and my dad's a chef so I often say "maybe that's because you are going to be a wonderful cook one day"... wow, she certainly does have the passion!! I just wish that she could lose maybe half a stone and then I really wouldn't worry. Sorry - I really do sound paranoid now!!

Is she bored?

I know when my DS1 is bored because he always asks for something to eat, this is when his time on the computer has finished, time up on the wii, xbox etc - his words are "Iam starving mum" - this can be literally 5 secs after he has finished a plateful nearly as big as DH's. I tell him children in third world countries are starving - you are merely bored!.

DS2 (who is skin and bone) does not ask for food like DS1 (perhaps it is because he is never bored as he is always up to mischief) .

Mmm, she definitely gets bored - not great at organising herself to do things but the first thing she says when she's finished lunch is "what's for tea" and she comes to ask for food at least 2/3 times an hour when she's at home.....it's exhausting!

DS1 is not great at organising himself either.

I know you have said she eats fruit etc, but perhaps you may have to cut up some peppers, carrots, cucumber and maybe put some cherry toms in aswell and have them in a pot so she can just go help herself without asking you constantly?

yes, thanks, that's a great idea... I will try that.

My God!! I had to check the name of the person who posted this. From the description this is exactly what my daughter is like. ALWAYS asking for snacks and bigger portions, tall for her age and a constant cause of stress having to say no!
Curious to know how this turned out as it is from a few years ago.

It sounds like her diet is quite carbohydrate-heavy. No wonder she's hungry soon after eating porridge or toast plus water and juice at 7 AM would leave me starving at 9, unless there were some fats in there a good slather of butter on the toast at a minimum, a handful of nuts, or the porridge made with full-fat milk and a dash of cream.

Depending on what's in the sandwich you give her, it's another meal of all carbs. Have you taken care to keep her satiated with proteins and healthy fats? When kids get into a carb cycle, this is the result -- constant snacking and a food obsession. She's telling you she's hungry because she is hungry, and if you don't teach her eating habits that don't revolve around sugars and starches sometime soon, she'll be a prime candidate for diabetes later in life.

I'm trying to get my DS (who's not overweight because he never sits still, but would eat all day if I let him) to think about whether it's his stomach, his mouth or his head that's hungry, and only actually eat if he's sure it's his stomach and not that he just fancies something, is bored or has thought of a particular food and got himself fixated on it.