Speech/Communication Delays - Support Thread

[RiverRock22]

I have noticed a lot of speech and language/communication threads on these boards lately. Any parent who has gone through this will know it is a lonely place and like me I assume many of you have been up to all hours trawling these boards looking for answers.

I thought a thread where those of us in the same boat could take refuge in would be a good idea. To share tips or just chat about our experiences.

My daughter is 2.8 and is experiencing what I initially thought was a speech delay, however, I feel now is more of a communication delay as her receptive language understanding is poor as well as limited use of gestures etc.

I feel she hits a lot of autistic red flags but only on the communication (and by default the social) front, although this isn't being marked as a clear cut case of autism just yet. I have sought SALT assistance and we are working through the communication areas, starting with attention and listening activities. My main concern at the minute is communication, she is so passive to the point she barely interacts with us and doesn't want too much input from us and this makes me so sad. I long to have a toddler that doesn't give me a minutes peace wanting to play games.

I know there have been many fantastic ladies such as @lingle who have been through this and came out the other side. So anyone who has been through it and wants to give advice you are more than welcome.

So welcome to this safe space to moan, worry, chat and get advice.

Hey Lingle, I've read most of what you've posted. We're currently working on the pre-linguistic skills. It's a long process and progress always feels so limited. I know things like eye contact are improving.

Did you find this part long and unrewarding? We are having some success with single word understanding (2-3 words) but most of the time I feel she is on another planet.

Hi there River,
a lot of the posts I did on here were to get some kind of company. It was pretty lonely sometimes.
who have you got around you? How can they support you?

Hello, mind if I join?
Our son ( 2 years and 4 months) has a understanding and verbal language delay which we saw a speech therapist privately for in November.
Unfortunately we re unable to pay for more sessions so it's just us muddling through until the NHS sees him in August/September.
Some other things were flagged up so we re waiting for an ASD/developmental assessment too.

I am currently seeing SALT who are working on attention/joint attention games. I have been trying to do lots of floor play, repetition, pointing, labelling, narrating etc.

She has better expressive language than receptive, it's all non verbal though bringing things, reaching towards etc. Verbally she makes sounds we think might be words such as vava for open. She has a few nouns which she just uses to label.

She has some ENT problems so waiting to get them sorted as well, I feel that while not being the reason they are definitely a barrier to her communication.

Can't wait for that breakthrough moment

I find at this stage the SALT isn't as effective, when you know what to do their half hour a week won't make or break your progress. So don't worry.

I am seeing NHS and have been to private and I definitely feel they focus more on speech than on language, receptive delay seems to be not as well catered for as expressive delay.

What level is your son at in terms of understanding?

What about the non-professional team? Have you got other family? Friends? Neighbours?

Yes, grandparents and husband Are who she mainly spends times with. They are all on board and trying to use the same strategies.

That’s good, you need a team x

Did you have any autism queries over your boys or was it all just receptive language? My girl doesn't turn to her name but I honestly don't know if she knows it or if it is autism.

Speech delay/hearing loss/communication and autism are so intertwined. Autism doesn't scare me, no communication/speech does.

Those around us did. The SALTs, etc

Ds2 interacted long before he knew his name meant him. He was about 3.5 when J realised he was repeating his own name as echolalia

I realised….

@lingle my DS is 7 now so I’ve been reading your posts for many years. Am I right in thinking that your DSs beyond communication had no delays? Toilet trained at a normal age, could hold a pen, write at a typical age and so on?

His understanding is limited to a 3 short instructions really, his eye contact and joint attention aren't as they should be and he barely responds to his name so the private SLT suggested we try working on those skills before anything else. He's improved a small amount in that sense but it's very slow.

@1990shopefulftm

What activities have you been doing? I've been trying to do my turn your turn games, nursery rhymes, playing with her when she's on the floor and some games with a 'high' e.g putting something on my head and sneezing to make her concentrate and laugh (and sometimes copy).

Carrie,
ds1 was advanced other than in receptive language (though had “too-early” empathy and musicality which I now know were part of the tiltedness). His mild hyper mobility seems to be associated too.

ds2 was comparatively behind but the salt said there were “no learning difficulties”. I think he was toilet trained by 5 - neighbour’s child was the same and both mum and nanny v relaxed about it so I followed their lead. As you will understand it was bottom of the worry list.

If you read my posts I would say I exaggerated his abilities/downplayed the extent of the issues (that was how I coped)

@lingle this must sound really silly but the attention and listening games and floor games I have mentioned - did you just keep doing this and eventually they started to engage and respond? Did you change your approach when they started to show progress or did you continue it just with greater joint attention?

River, I think what was a bit depressing was that I kept realising I had to go back further/back to something even more basic. I had to keep defining the goals. I don’t think I posted a lot about those moments of realisation as they were hard
and there would be that sinking feeling when I realised there was (yet) another hurdle to overcome.

Afternoon everyone and big hello to @lingle thank you for posting on here. Although my LO doesn't have a specifically-receptive language issue I have read many of your past threads and really appreciated all of the advice and supportive posts you've given people over the years - I know I've taken a lot from them. I recognise the exaggerating abilities/downplaying issues thing as a sort of coping mechanism though I often have flashes of deep despair - it's exhausting. How are your sons doing these days?

Ds2 says he is “coming into my powers” and is annoyed that A levels are interfering with him “talking to girls”
ds1 is actually the more anxious one. The empathy turned inwards at adolescence. He’s a high achiever - currently regressing whilst at home from Uni and being a bit annoying.
in other words I have all the problems I wanted to have :)

It’s nice to pop over here because the issues were such a huge huge part of who I was. Feels healthy to connect with it and finding it was of use to strangers is very special

….you feel quite cut off from your in-life mum peers so this place let those connections flourishing

Flourish…

Lots of singing nursery rhymes and we play with bubbles a lot as that's helped with his eye contact and attention.