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Funny things your children say

83 replies

moosh · 06/12/2004 14:09

I love these threads, we can never have enough of them because our children are always saying mad ans funny things.
The other day, dh and I were discussing the Christams Holidays and I turned to ds1 (5yrs) and said, "You'll break up from school in a two weeks". And he replied in a very confused manner, "What did you say mummy, we have to break up the whole school in two weeks!". Dh and I sniggered and proceeded to try and explain the term "breaking up FROM school" rather than "breaking up THE school!!" Love him Grin.
Come on mumsnetters you must have some funny ones too.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Kindersurpise · 07/03/2008 23:55

Bubbaloo
Don't you know that all drains lead to the sea? Was Kermit in the room when you watched Nemo?

And ROFL at Kitbits faulty spoon

lucyellensmum · 07/03/2008 23:56

~Oh bless you might get a surprise one day then

wibbet

tori32 · 08/03/2008 00:06

dinner table conversation following DH getting his closing account balance cheque of 22p!
me- where did all daddys pennies go?
dd 2.2y- in the bottle! (Loose change jar!)

dd at the weekend went to market with dh. Usual toy stall (2nd hand) was turned into a tombola stall. DD gets tickets and pays the man and DH says you should get something (it said win something every go). DD gets a lolly which the man gives her.
She looks at the man, then the lolly and says 'have a word!'

jsygurl · 09/03/2008 14:44

My girl when 5 said with a sigh "Time goes so much faster when you get older doesn't it Mummy"

My sister used to say "night night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite" to her daughter, then after years, realised what her daughter was saying at the same time was "night night, sleep tight, don't let the bunk beds bite". No wonder she wet the bed every night waiting for her bunk beds to bite!

My girl aged about 2 walked in on Daddy having a wee, and with great excitement pointed to the rude bit on show and shouted gleefully "fishy!"

In a restaurant my boy 5 asked very loudly about the bald man on the next table "why does that man have no hair?"

My girl 5 asked about a black lady stood in front of us "why has that lady got funny coloured skin?" (my step sister is black so that came out of left field).

In a busy shop queue "Hurry up! My Mummy needs a wee!" (can't recall which that was- far too embarrassing)

My daughter mid tantrum in another busy newsagents, whilst throwing packs of chocolates at me screaming "Buy me chocolate! Buy me chocolate!" (actually that isn't funny at all. I still brak out in a sweat at the recollection and it was 6 years ago).

When my Mum was visiting "Grandma, your skin is so crinkly"

Ahh, memories.

someoneorother · 19/01/2009 13:01

3 y/o daughter to Mumsnetter:
How old will you be? [on your next birthday]
Mumsnetter: 27
Daughter: Does that mean you'll be old enough to mend Daddy's clothes?

snowleopard · 19/01/2009 13:11

Ah we had a good one the other day. DS (3) was telling me about a special kind of fish that bats eat, called a "klaegong" (he makes up words like this all the time).

"It has no face and no fins" says he.
Me: "So how does it swim?"
DS: "It swims without a care, mummy."

CrackopentheBaileys · 19/01/2009 13:36

ds (4 at the time) in his bedroom as he had been a very cheeky boy.

Me - Jake I am very cross with you, please go and sorry to Nanny.
Jake - I don't want to
Me - well then I will have to take your pocket money away
Jake - (completely meaningfuly) That's ok Mummy, you buy yourself something nice!

Lol

This one may not fit in with this thread, but when he was 3 or 4 (not sure which, long time ago!) he sprayed my salmon dinner with deodorant because it smelt 'fishy'. I couldn't be mad, he really thought it would just make it smell better! (damn that salmon looked good too!)

mumsobusy · 19/01/2009 23:30

My mother bought a toy ring for dd 5 once, at that point my sister had gotten engaged my dd came to me and said

dd - Look (showed ring on finger)
me - oh thats nice did grandma buy you ring
dd - no my fiance
me - oh who is it
dd - you dont know him
me - can I meet him
dd - no he lives far away
me - whats his name
dd - I dont know I have nt named him yet

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