Sucking for comfort/sucking for food?

[Lateasusual]

I have breast fed since birth and my baby is now 7 weeks but I still don't feel that it is going well. My baby cries a lot and so I do the regular checks of hungry? wet? etc. It is very rare for my baby to refuse being fed but will quite often just suck for a minute or two and then I think sucks for comfort. It can be really confusing to know what he wants (particularly when you are told to feed on demand) and I am scared that he is getting into a habit of using me as a dummy for comfort too much. It is also a bit of a problem because it is messing up my milk supply and I feel that he is sort of snacking rather than having a proper feed. How do I know the difference between him wanting to suck for comfort and actually wanting food?

My DD did this and I think it's a very 'boy' thing too. I ended up offering DD the dummy (was very against them but changed my mind!) as some babies do need to suck alot. Anyway - it completely solved the issue and when she was hungry, the dummy would get rejected and then we all knew where we were.

Does your baby cry if you're cuddling him and carrying him around in a sling for example?

Has the number of feeds increased just recently? It may be that he is going through a growth spurt (DS did at anbout 6 weeks). I just fed him a lot while he was spurting and then things settled down. He never took to a dummy so can't advise there.

A baby uses a dummy in place of a breast,not a breast in place of a dummy.

Of course babies suck for comfort.Breastfeeding means they are snuggles up next to someone who is warm and soft and delicious. What is not to like?

It won't 'mess up' your supply. on the contrary,the more the breast is stimulated,the more milk you will produce.

If you really need a break, hand the (fed) baby to someone else and take a bath or a walk.

I don't think it is a growth spurt as he has been doing this for a long time. I think christmas has made it harder to get into a routine because of all the visiting and lots of different people looking after himetc. I was hoping it would start to improve when it was just me on my own with him as I would be able to observe him and try to start to recognise different signals.

In terms of him crying a lot - again this is quite hit and miss. He is generally happiest when he is naked on his changing mat so he spends a lot of time like this and I just have to deal with the extra washing when the accidents happen. He likes being held up on my shoulder but only if I'm walking around and again the crying stops for a while. Then we try distraction techniques such as rattles and singing etc all of which are temporary fixes really. He is just plain awkward!!

Babies are hard work full stop, whatever you do with them. I was amazed at how high maintenence mine were.

My ds sucked a dummy which helped when he wasn't acutally hungry, but dd (4 months old) point blank refuses dummies and bottles (and beakers) and will only use me to feed and for comfort. Occasionally we get her to sleep using other means, but not often. So it's not just boys....

I think it's great that you try different techniques to stop him just using you for comfort. I am so knackered by my 22 month old that I usually give in and let DD use me for comfort / food. I don't think yours is particularly awkward, some babies just want to hang on more than others. It is a phase though - he won't be doing it when he's 8, I wouldn't have thought.

Could your baby be crying because he is overtired but getting a bit confused about the signals? my dd started to get unsettled at about 6 weeks, would cry and have a brief feed but then not continue. After a lot of posting on here i realised she had stopping being able to drift in and out of sleep as she had previously and was getting overtired. At this age she needed about 6(!) naps a day - including one straight after her morning feed. sorting her sleep out (not easy, but we used to put her in a sling and walk her round) helped to regulate her feeds.

Hope your little one settles soon

Thanks for your encouragement - Sometimes its hard to keep things in perspective isn't it when you're dealing with a crying baby on your own. You just kind of expect as a Mum that you should be able to put things right for them. I'm terrible because I worry about everything!

I have bought a dummy and have been keeping it for when I'm really desperate so I suppose things can't be that bad really becasue its still in its case at the moment.

Have you tried a sling? A wrap or a puch rather than a Baby Bjorn or similar. They can really help with unsettled babies.

With my first son, he cried when I put him down after a feed, and i thought he was still hungry. I used a dummy and realised he only wanted to suck for comfort. I hate dummies, but my second son (10 weeks old) is the same, and it really can help free up you/your boob. He also cries a lot when he gets tired and can't get to sleep when I put him down (even with a dummy now, as he has got used to being jiggled in a sling or in the pushchair/car). I have been using the huggababy sling... but then it can create dependency on you to get them to sleep, as I have found. It's all tricky at this stage!