I HAVE TO DO AN ESSAY ABOUT SMACKING CHILDREN.....TELL ME YOUR OPINIONS PLEASE

[fawkeoff]

i am doing an essay about the smacking law and want to know the peoples pros and cons, if you think that the law should be changed....should it be banned or should it be slacker.i would appreciate if you could give me personal experiences as well

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I haven't read the whole thread, but I do smack when a life is being put in danger - for example, when DS ran out into the road the other day when I had told him to stay holding onto the pushchair. it is a very very rare occurence for me to smack, and not something I would do every day

I don't smack my kids, nor does my DH - we never have. It's not that i'm a self righteous know it all mother, but I was badly physically abused as a child, up until I left home, and basically I just don't want to turn into my Mother
I think there are better ways of getting the message across. HTH

Smacking is bad - for parents. In my experience when I have smacked son (always because he has hit me first) it has been a knee-jerk reaction, makes him more angry, makes me feel like a jerk and a bad parent and I vow never to do it again. But being hit by an angry child is not nice and it is a natural reaction to retaliate. I have never smacked as a punishment or a deterrent always bcuase I just feel angry that he has hit me. I feel very strongly that a little boy should not be able to hit his own mother and get away with it, and after all hittng back is a natural reaction. That being said, it makes me feel bad, especially the primeval flash of knowledge that rises up frm my subconscious that lets me know I have more power (sorry very psych I know .

I also agree that shouting could be more harmful - ah me another stick with which to beat myself (rather than DS)!

I have no problems with smacking, in certain circumstances.

Yes, there are other ways to discipline a child, and they should be explored before smacking is considered.

UNLESS the child is in danger and a short, sharp shock of a smack on the hand or backside is the difference between him being safe and him injuring himself. i would rather a sore hand than a burnt one from touching the fire, or a broken one from running into the road or falling off whatever he's climbed up.

The rest of the time, i prefer a "three strikes and you're out" scheme. Its what my mom did with me.

strike 1 - Please don't do that again
strike 2 - I told you not to do that, don't do it again.
strike 3 - If you do that one more time i will smack you.

if i did it the fourth time , i got the flat of her hand across my legs, and quite frankly, if i was being bad enough to get to that point, i deserved it.. my son will get the same.

Its my right as a parent to discipline my child as i see fit, and i would rather be able to make the choice on wether i think my sons behaviour warrants a smack.

just to add to kaishay, i also see smacking as a valid form of discipline. discipline is about training your children. it is a positive thing when used correctly. I have never smacked in anger. it is used occassionally when ds has consistently stepped over the mark. i will warn him, then explain what i am going to do, that i love him and want him to behave but he has given me no choice. i would usually use a sharp smack to the hand but have used on bottom 1/2 times. I think smacking out of fear is not a good reason so don't think i would smack if my child ran out into road without warning. if he had been consistently told in the minutes running up to incident then that would be defiance. i feel it is my right to bring my child up as i believe is fit. If you are genuinely interested on differing views on smacking, visit the website of the Christian Institute.

I don't believe in smacking in any form for any reason and I think it should be made illegal.

I don't believe it teaches the child anything positive, it just makes them fearful of you as an adult. My children make mistakes, display unacceptable/unwanted behaviours from time to time, I see it as my role as a parent to guide them and teach them right from wrong without frightening or harming them.

I beleive it is a form of bullying and for this reason have never smacked my children.

However I can understand adults hitting out in pure frustration (I have never done it but boy have I been very close!), but still believe it is wrong. I think pre meditated smacking is the worst.

This is purely what I believe (and DH) and I would never ever judge another parent on their choice of discipline as I have my reason and they have theirs.

I do not think I am a perfect parent, I make many mistakes I am just trying to do what I believe is right for my children.

Hope this has helped as I have been very honest but at the same time I hope I haven't offended anyone as I know this is a very emotive subject (esp on here!!)

I have never smacked either of my ds's despite having a wicked temper myself.

Agree that the law should be changed as it is pointless at the moment.

Only other thing I would add is that to the people who say that "I was smacked and it never did me any harm". I would say it has done you serious harm because it has taught you that bullying and hurting children is ok. We have all seen out of control parents whacking their children which whilst I find horrifying (and obviously very sad) I find not nearly as scary as the pre-medidated, calculated parents who smack.