how do I stop DS from screaming the street down at bedtime? Long sorry.

[Bewilderbeast]

He only does it with me, will not let me put him to bed at all. He screams so hard he goes purple (he will be 1 on Monday). He goes to sleep like a dream for DP. Now I am quite aware that it is all temper and that he is screaming for DP's attention . I have tried banishing DP from bedtime and just letting him scream but he just gets more and more wound up and more and more purple. I can cuddle him/not cuddle him/ignore him/be in the room/be out of the room/wind down with bath and story. Nothing I do will stop him screaming and let him fall asleep. I can do exactly what DP does and it still doens't stop him. I have tried accompanying DP for a few days and then gradually reducing DPs presence. No luck. So HELP I am at the end of my tether and I find it really upsetting that DS doesn't want me (although I don't show him that I try to remain impassive) I am only home for about an hour and a half to 2 hours before he goes to bed and he pretty much doesn't want to be anywhere near me.

DS was exactly like this with DH and then it just stopped. I remember once I went out for a drink and as soon as I left DS woke up and was still screaming two hours later. Now he waits by the door for him to get home and throws himself into his arms. He's 13.5 months.

We were at the end of our tethers too and I'm not too sure what changed. I do make a massive fuss of DH in front of DS and we have co-slept on and off which means that they can have a cuddle.

Basically, I just wanted to say it's not you. DH did nothing wrong and neither are you and your son will grow out of it.

I think at this age it's change that's hard, it's not personal to you, though it obviously feels it! During this phase it's any changeover they find hard, so that's why he doesn't seem to want to be near you.

It really will get better, your ds will get better at accepting change. I think you just need to ride it out. what I would do is get plenty of sole care of ds on the days you don't work, so at the weekend spend one long morning or afternoon, just you and ds without dp present. So rather than concentrating the 'You' time to bedtime when he is very tired and more unable to accept change, focus on the 'you' time being at the weekend and build it up from there. It won't be like this forever!