How do you discipline your 10yr ds other than grounding/deprivation?

[lilibet]

I need something new

Been called into school today and was told that he has been behaving badly recently. The head teacher (also a friend) described him as having all his manners lobotomised! We have found this at home as well recently, his attitude and back chat are dreadful.

On the other hand, she showed me a piece of work that he had done and said it was one of the best that she had seen in a few years and "showed a sophistication far beyond that of a 10 year old boy"

grrrrr

will watch this with interest... I find grounding is the only thing that works for my 9 year old... mind you I get punished as well when he's hanging arround the house bored!

No deprivation, otherwise known as Consequences, is all I've got at the moment.

Pocket money.
Screens
etc etc.

Sometimes though if we get in a rut, I do try and do something a bit more cheerful to change the temperature in the house. Like - tell you what, you pull yourself together and stop bad-mouthing everyone and being lippy and I will - add thing of your choice.

I think this is called bribery.

So that's me then, grounding, deprivation and bribery.

in house of scum it would be:

1)serious talk to check he understands evil actions
2)take natural consequences of action or non-action if applicable
3)and/or loss of screen time (tv, computer,gamecube etc) for set period

You must be v proud of ds's sophisticated masterpiece.

I've never used grounding, don't know why, it's never appealed. Withdrawn various of their privileges but from this age on it gets easier in some ways, harder in others. I pretty much pick my battles and wait for the natural maturation process to mend most other annoyances. Mine are 17, 15 and 8.

I threatened to kiss my 10yo ds in the playground He has only just started asking for a kiss before we get to the gates

How about encouraging the good with a treat at the end of a good week i.e. if you behave well I will take you bowling or whatever he likes? Don't believe in gifts for good behaviour, but going somewhere is not too bad, even somewhere that doesn't cost much but he loves.

lol MrsWeasley, that wouldn't work with my 10 year old, he'll hug and kiss me anywhere.

Would however work with the 13 and the 9 year old.

I have just started giving mine pocket money, but it is earned on a daily basis, room has to be tidy, shoes all stuff put away, and good manners, if they are rude then I give them a warning, in 4 weeks dd1 age 10 has only lost one days pocket money, the previous week we were having daily tantrums

ds2 is the youngest of three, the others are 18 and 14

Why doesn't it get easier with practice?

He is really sorry and we have had big tears from him about everything.

At school he is missing 5 playtimes and will have to copy out sections of the Bible!!

He nearly fainted when we told him - he thought he had to copy out the whole thing

I know what you mena about grounding - sometimes it's more of a punishment for me!