Not talking by 2

[Amy1997]

My daughter is turning 2 in a few weeks and she still isn't talking! She has said Mam , dad but hasn't said them for nearly a month now. She has a mild hearing problem but does seems to hear sounds fine. She loves music and running about with her brother. But she won't play with toys at all (dolls ect),the only things she will play with are blocks and musical toys. She is very cuddly and knows what she wants. She also doesn't point. I'm very worried as what this could be as I feel she is very behind.

Lack of speech could be due to her hearing loss but I think it's worth taking the m-chat test too as it can also be a sign of ASD.

It's probably also worth getting in touch with your local Speech & Language Service (SLT) to see if you can self refer.

My son's started talking at age 3. Relax and do your best to teach him.
It's fine but better do some ASD test cuz it'd be very useful to know earlier than later.

Michael Moore
Reviewer at DetectHistory

Hi OP my son is the same u can pm me if u want to talk

@JiltedJohnsJulie @MichaelMoore @onlyfoolsnhorses thank you for answering me. I can't get her referred for speech and language until they have sorted the hearing out and same for getting her tested for autism as they said the test wouldn't work properly having a hearing problem. So I'm just in limbo at the minute. She's still not talking but she does communicate by putting what she wants me to do in my hands. She loves playing peek a boo and finds it hilarious to grab something of mine and run off with it so I chase her.

My ds was same he had glue ear in both ears. He did pick up talking eventually and when he had the grommets put in it improved dramatically after that.

@uhoh2020 when u say eventually what kind of age was it?

@uhoh2020 aw that's good to hear. Yes my little girl has already had a hearing test in December and we found out that she has mild hearing loss (she can't hear low tones) , she has glue ear in both ears also and her eardrums are always red. We were supposed to go back in March but then the whole covid thing happened. If the hearing test shows the same again then she will get grommets but I just feel like it's all not just her hearing as she hasn't really come on in months. It doesn't feel like I have a 2 year old. She's the most amazing little girl but she is so far behind ( her cousin who has just turned one does and says more than she does) I'm just worrying I think.

He was 4 by the time he had the grommets put in. Obviously his speech had improved as he could barely speak at all when he turned 2 but was behind his peers. He had a little bit of speech therapy but caught up in no time.
The consultant explained to me that for him it was like hearing under water so was harder for him to repeat sounds.

Might sound silly but lots of eye contact when you are talking so they can see your lips moving. When he was about 3 the health visitor offered for him to be referred for a sort of sign language (cant think what its called) but I declined as he was starting to talk a bit more by then and I didn't want him to replace the talking he had started to do by using the signing. I cant remember if he pointed or not.

@uhoh2020 thank you for letting me no. If you don't mind me asking did he seem to understand anything or not? My little girl knows when I'm saying no , or playing peek a boo. But she doesn't follow simple tasks such as bring me the cushion ect ( but I don't no if it's because she doesn't no what I'm saying🤷🏻‍♀️).

It was over 10 years ago now but yes I think he did understand things. I always knew what he wanted how he was feeling etc and he always seemed happy he didn't seem frustrated he couldn't communicate

@uhoh2020 yeh apart from the understanding most things , it does sound like my daughter. If she wants a drink she will put her cup in my hand and walk alittle and will look back to see if I'm following her. She also tries to feed me with a spoon. She is happy and doesn't get frustrated that much apart from the odd moment which I'm sure all toddlers have.

Youd be surprised at how common it is for 1 reason or another. They really do all catch up at some point. Speak to your health visitor ask for a referral to SALT and chase up the ENT referral once they're up and running again. But in the mean time dont worry about it and enjoy her as she is, I promise it will be ok in the long run.
Keep talking to her face to face keep smiling keep singing her favourite nursery rhymes she will get there in her own time.

I do think you have valid concerns - speech delays are normally not concerning as they are very common at this age, but the fact that it is happening at the same time as her not being able to follow simple instructions and (more importantly) not pointing to share interests makes it worrying.... you need to pass these concerns to your HV or GP. I recommend you also take MCHAT test online.

@uhoh2020 thanks for that. Yeh she loves nursery rhymes and I asked my health visitor they said when she is 2 they will refer her so hopefully once all this is done she will get referred. And @AladdinMum I have taken the mchat test before and she scored medium but when I brought it up to health visitor they said it won't show everything as she does have a hearing problem so they wouldn't refer her for anything until the hearing is sorted. I'm probably just over worrying! She love playing hide and seek , peek a boo, she likes bringing me toys ( not to play with but I think to show me) and loves flipping through books. So I don't no hopefully she will start coming on soon.

I agree, the hearing issue should be looked at first as it can impair both expressive and receptive language however it would be very unlikely to impair pointing to request or pointing to share interests (or other social communicative gestures/behaviour like social referencing) - speech delayed toddlers tend to increase their use of gestures to compensate for their lack of speech (on average, by 18 months they would be pointing over 50 times a day).

@AladdinMum yeh I thought the same. I asked the last time I saw my health visitor and she said because she waves , play peek a boo and claps that they aren't worried about the pointing. She has just started to follow my point so hopefully she may pick it up in time. She always tries to get my attention by doing things that she knows I join in with ( dancing, peek a boo, blowing raspberry's at me). I just wish she would talk to me ( I can't wait to hear her say Mam properly because she goes months without saying it and I've not heard it for ages now)

Yes, following a point normally precedes pointing so that is a great sign - it is very odd what your health visitor said as clapping, waving and playing peek a boo are all learned skills while pointing is not, it's an intrinsic skill so are not connected and those two sets of skills develop very differently.

@AladdinMum yes hopefully something does come of it! And yeh that's just what they told me. I just have this feeling that I can't shake that it is autism. She's different to all the other 2 year olds I know even some who are 3-4 months younger than her. I'm just worried for what the future may hold.

Can anyone offer any insight to me? Not aladdinmum however. My son is 25 months and no recogniseable words Altho lots of different sounds and babbling and he understands most things I think

He was meant to start nursery yesterday but has been put on hold due to covid-19 and me not being a key worker so hopefully can start on Sep when he will be2.5

I'm trying at home but I've been told he's too young for flash cards. My mum said keep showing him body parts etc which I do but he never sits still and if I make it into a game he just laughs so dunno is he listening to me showing him nose ears etc

I give choices but he just tries to grab what he wants and gets upset if he can't have it

Do I need to worry yet?

@onlyfoolsnhorses honestly sounds alittle like my little girl and she turned 2 a few days ago. I'm just trying to sing to her, there's a YouTube video that is called 'learn to talk' and she loves it, maybe give that a try. Also I've made personalised flashcards which consis of photos of me , her bottle , and stuff around or house so it doesn't confuse her. Sorry I'm not much help. I'm In the exact same situation and it's so hard. But just keep doing what you are doing x

Hi @Amy1997 thanks for that advice. Lots of ppl have said he's too young for flash cards right now

Is she your first child?

@onlyfoolsnhorses no problem and no she's my second , I also have a 4 year old who was talking by 18 month. He now has a good vocabulary but will need speech and language as he mispronounces words. My 2 year old has said mam/dad but then she goes weeks without saying them again and I now haven't heard her say Mam for months x

@Amy1997 this is my first child. He says yeh and says whey when gong down the slide but not sure they count as words. Does ur little one babble lots throughout the day? Mine never shuts up which I hope is a good sign

@onlyfoolsnhorses yeh she babbles a lot and sometimes I think she trying to tell me things but it's all babble. She also says wheeyy on a swing! And today she did pretend play for the first time! ( she gave me a cup from her tea set and put it to my mouth for me to drink and when I would say can Mam have another drink she would come over and put it to my mouth!) that was really big for me because she has never done it before. I'm sure we will both get there with our little ones xx