Sitting properly in a chair

[LiamsMum]

Can I just ask for a bit of advice from some mothers with older children..? My ds is 25 months and still sits in his high chair to eat, but occasionally I let him sit on a chair at the table. Problem is, he'll have a couple of bites and then all he wants to do is squirm around or get down off the chair. I spend the entire time saying, "Sit down properly, put your bottom on the chair, stay there and eat your food," etc etc! I know he's still a toddler but when should I start trying to train him to sit properly? He's at that 'search and destroy' stage at the moment, so perhaps it's too early to expect him to sit still. What do you think? I'm a bit unsure about whether I should be concerned about this yet. He's also the type to run off in public if I don't keep him restrained, so I'm also trying to teach him to stay with me. Thank you for your help...

If you find out how to train him , let me know.

Both my 18month old and 3 1/2 year old still squirm and run about. Except when my eldest is at nursery - there they get 12 preschoolers to sit round a table all at once and eat properly!

Liamsmum, I sympathise! My ds (nearly 5) used to be just like this, but now sits quite nicely (most of the time ) - however he is nearly always very hungry so just concentrates on shovelling his food down as fast as possible. Dd, on the other hand (who is 33 months), is still a terrible wriggler, and is far too big for a high chair now (and far too grown up, in her opinion). I think that the only thing you can do is lead by opinion (I find that my dd is unlikely to sit nicely unless I'm sitting too and eating with her) and choose the meals when he gets to sit on a chair - if you know he's hungry and it's something he likes, then go the chair route and praise him when he's sat well. Other than that, try not to stress too much about it - they get better with age (dd is far better now than she was 6 months ago). I think at 25 months they still don't keep things in their minds for very long, so remembering that they are supposed to sit still is hard. He'll get there - my dd actually sat and ate her breakfast like a little angel this morning, then asked to get down from the table and even cleared her bowl and cup without being asked ... ... so miracles do happen occasionally!

SoupDragon, I wish I knew how nurseries manage it - at our nursery the 4 year olds even serve themselves from dishes in the middle of the table.

However, I'm told by friends whose children have previously gone from our nursery to the local infants school that my son's table manners will deteriorate drastically when he starts school in September .

Just a thought, but does your ds's highchair have support for his feet? It may be that he is uncomfortable sitting with his legs dangling down, or just that it feels different. He might sit still(er)on a child-sized chair at a low table (but that rather removes the point of having him sit at the table with you!).

I have always had to talk to my dd more or less constantly to keep her interest so that she doesn't want to get down... can be difficult for me to actually eat my food but I get some in while she's answering then I get her to eat while I'm keeping the "interesting" conversation going. Oh and it's very tiring too, sometime this century I'd like to have a meal in peace and quiet!!

So its not going to get better Cam? My 18 m.o. stops and waits for the praise after every successful delivery of spoon into mouth. Sometimes I'm just grateful when he puts it down and gets stuck in with his fingers.

And I have to praise before he will even close his mouth let alone actually eat it.

I think it gets better when they are teenagers....but you don't notice it because then they are ghastly in every other way

My son (21 mo.) is very much like yours. We still feed him in a high chair which is pulled up at the table with us. Occasionally, if we're out and there is no high chair I put him in a regular chair, but he doesn't last long before he's trying to get down/up/out. I usually put a harness on him which kind of keeps him in the chair a little longer. I figure it's a sort of "training wheels," for sitting still in a chair. But I think a lot of it's just personality and it will be quite a while before he's sitting still in a chair. He is also quite happy to run off in the street, so I either keep him in his buggy if we are around big streets or cars, or hold on to him tightly elsewhere. I keep meaning to buy a leash, but haven't quite got around to it.