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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Is ds 20mnths too you for dummy fairy concept?

17 replies

clarevoiant · 01/08/2007 13:40

Just wondered if anyone else has used the 'dummy fairy' on an under 2yo.

We are fortunate that ds has chewed holes in all his dummies and,although he still wants one, I have told him he's not getting any more and that he shouldn't have chewed holes in the ones he's got (am i a mean mummy?)

he tried to suck them but doesnt like them anymore (unsurprisingly). so i told him that one night the dummy fairy will come and take them away to be recycled for the new babies.

have now got dummy fairy present and am all ready to go. is he too young to understand the concept of the dummy fairy?

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Kewcumber · 01/08/2007 13:42

at 20 months mine wouldn't understand. But then he's only recently grasped "do you want some raisins" so perhaps not typical

EscapeFrom · 01/08/2007 13:42

ds1 didn't get the dummy fairy until he was 3.

Kewcumber · 01/08/2007 13:43

also when he wakes up at 2am screaming for it (like mine did last night becasue it'd fallen out of the cot) are you going to have a discussion about the dummy fairy?

Original poster

clarevoiant · 01/08/2007 13:49

hmm...maybe he is a bit young then...

I was going to help him make a box and decorate it with him for his old dummies togo in, and explain that the dummy fairy was going tocomefor his broken dummies and that if he was really lucky he would get a present in return...

(sorry for shoddy typing dp spilt coke on the keyboard and the keys are all sticky - grrr)

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MrsPuddleduck · 01/08/2007 13:54

Got rid of our dummies at about 27 months and sent them to Santa.

We both collected the various dummies from around the house and put them in a big brown envelope. We then "wrote" the adress on the front (my parents house).

Next we went to the argos catalogue and picked out a toy which he wanted to ask santa for, cut the picture out and put it in the evelope with the dummies so santa would know which one to send.

We then both walked to the post box and he posted the envelope in the box.

Worked a treat. If he cried for the dummies I asked him what we did with them and he remebered that they were in the post to santa. The whole thing was reinforced on Christmas day when the present arrived.

I don't know whether it would have worked at 20 months. He was two in the September and we posted them off at Christmas and he definatley understood the concept by then.

Kewcumber · 01/08/2007 14:02

does he use them a lot? Perhaps you could just cut it down. I reduced use to pushchair, car seat and cot, and mornings before he is dressed, then he has to put the dummy inside the cot himself and come downstairs (no dummies downstairs). He does that reasonably well. We now don;t have dummies in teh pushchari or the car unless on very long journeys and I want him to sleep.

Original poster

clarevoiant · 01/08/2007 14:04

thanks Willmouse,thats a lovely idea :-)

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Original poster

clarevoiant · 01/08/2007 14:10

well,he's pretty much managing without them,though they are still there. there are times,like getting him to sleep at night and inthe car where he(and we) really miss them and he will try to suck a broken one (i knpow he's not supposed to! ) which he will then hand back and give me that 'mummy this one is broken please get me something else'look.

so i kinda figured i'd use the dummy fairy to re-inforce the not needing dummies thing, instead of going out and buying more (which dp suggested to get him to settle at night!) and just get rid of the ones we have once and for all

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Kewcumber · 01/08/2007 14:12

could you buy him one and do the posting it to santa thing for Christmas maybe he will be able to understand better - do you think he will understand now? Presumably you are the best judge.

Tiggerish · 01/08/2007 14:17

Willmouse - we did something very similar to that with ds when he was 2.7, but it was trip to ELC and a (pre-arranged) exchange for a toy.

clarevoiant - I think 20 months is a bit young for the dummy-fairy but it seems too good an opportunity to pass up If you get some more, it will be ages before they get holes in. I would be inclined to leave him with the broken ones when he asks for one, and he will lose interest before long. Getting rid of them altogether might be a bit tricky imo.

Tiggerish · 01/08/2007 14:18

Obviously I don't mean leave him chewing on a broken one - just give it to him to reinforce the fact that it is broken iykwim.

studentmum1 · 01/08/2007 14:19

my dd was younger than 20 months and my friend had another baby, i explained to dd that the new baby would need the dummy more than her and she voluntered to give it away! nothing more was said and she forgot all about!

Original poster

clarevoiant · 01/08/2007 14:26

thanks Tiggerish,

i agree about the opportunity.... i dont really want to buy anymore if i can avoid it and since he is managing (to a degree) without them atm.

he seems to have a great understandingwhen it comes to the things he wants,and is a bit bad at understanding the things he doesnt.

i.e. if you say, 'lets go on the bike',hewill find the garage door keys and put them in the door (allbeit upside down) then stand there shoutingMUMMY and pat his head (cos he knows he has to put his helmet on!)

yet if i say 'wait here'or 'stay with mummy' or 'dont runn away' he will automatically be gonelike thewind!

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ChasingSquirrels · 01/08/2007 14:31

too abstract - the bike ride is a concrete thing that he has done before, the staying put he probably understands but chooses to ignore, but the dummy fairy - I don't think so.

xxxjoxxx · 02/08/2007 10:59

hi when my youngest was about 13 months he had bitten through his dummy i tried to swap it for a new one and he wouldnt take it i tried all different types of dummy in the end i gave up during the day it was no problem but at night it was awfull but he only got upset for about 3 nights then nothing at all infact he slept better and was easier to settle
it might not be the same for you but thats how it was for me
hope this give you some hope ? xx

xxxjoxxx · 02/08/2007 11:03

my eldest didnt give his up till he was 3 he would only have it at night but i went on holiday and we heard a "baby mermaid" crying so he took it out of his pocket and threw to the baby mermaid when he wasnt looking i picked it up and put it in the bin lol

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House · 02/08/2007 11:19

my dd was around 22 months when the dummy fairy came, she was very involved, we went on a dummy hunt (with a special sparkly box for all the dummies) and then she said goodbye to them at bedtime, she cried a bit but we explained that the dummy fairy was taking them to all the little babies that need them, she was fine, dummy fairy left a present in the morning and stickers for 7 days then another present, then she forgot all about it.

it can work but it depends how articulate your child is. dd could hold a conversation and understand what we were talking to her about, my ds however will mroe than likely be a different matter!

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