Awful behaviour 4yo (help!)

[Lucyb34]

Hi, my 4.5 yo started reception in September, she's good as gold at school but at home her behaviour is getting worse and worse.
She backchats at everything I ask her to do, such as brush her teeth/get dressed etc turns into a long drawn out battle of wills.
She stamps her feet and huffs.
Generally her attitude is absolutely appalling.
She is rude (she told her Aunty she didn't like her because she was fat - not something we say at home)
I feel like I don't know her at all since she's started school. I always try and stay calm and explain and talk to her about her behaviour, I've stopped treats,her teachers don't have any problems at all.
I'm just lost with what to do.
Thank you for listening, feeling particularly defeated this evening.
L x

You have my sympathies. My 4 year old was aso a nightmare after relatively easy toddlerhood.
It turns out she was struggling with friendships at school (and just generally testing boundaries and being 4).
The one we did that worked well was 'playfighting' where I would try to kiss her and she would do pretend karate chops (without landing them).
This seemed to get some of her aggression out.