Why do they keep asking the same question over again? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

[beansprout]

Seriously. If I understood, I think it would help me cope with it a bit better. Ds is 2.5 btw.

Thanks

[snile]

I think it's that they need to hear the answer a few times in order to process it properly.

ds1 doesn't ask the same question over and over again, but he does say "what?" about 10 times after he gets an answer. It is annoying.

To see if the answer changes.

it does get better, but they also become more vocal and even more talkative. But the why does get better eventually, and wierdly you hardly notice its passing, until someone starts talking about how much their lo says why why why, and you think "you know, xyz doesn't do it any more [grin}".

We don't get "why?" yet, but do get

"Whatzoo doin', mummy?"
[answer]
[three seconds later] "Mummy, Whatzoo doin'?"
[repeat ad nauseam]

Ummm... they like repetition at this age, so there may be an element of that?

Why?

It's more:
Can we read this book now?
No, mummy is washing up
Can we read it now?
No
Can we read it now?
No, not now, later.
Can we read it now?
No
Can we read it now?
(mummy starts to ignore)
Can we read it now?
Can we read it now?
Can we read it now?
Mummy, can we read it now?

etc etc etc

sometimes at that age, the certainty of the answer is comforting, in a world where they may feel they have little control over what happens...this one thing they know they can rely on. It's the same reason they love to watch the same video over and over and over and over.

or maybe it's just because!

oh - I think all the Why's threw us off
You could just read the book? lol
If you distract with another (more acceptable to you) activity then it takes their mind off the thing they wanted.
Of course they also have to understand no, but when ds1 was around that age I did find myself saying no all the time, so I rethought it and started to say yes more, or to suggest other things that I was happier with (well, we haven't really got time for painting, its a bit too messy, would you like to do some drawing instead).In your example, stand him on a chair and let him play in the washing up water while you dry up, etc.

I hate to tell you this but it mutates after a while into a child's bonkers idea of conversation.

Partly to keep conversation going, I suspect.
At least they get a reaction - even if reaction is "Ask that one more time & you'll be under the patio..."

I think at that age, it's mostly a magic word - just keep saying 'why' and mummy will keep talking! It's brilliant! Why go neglected while she washes up when you can keep saying 'why' and watch her attempt to explain, tear her hair out and sob as she resorts (as she promised she never would) to 'because I say so'.

I get:
'I can't hear you!'
'WHAT did you say?'
And the constantly repeated question with NO space for me to answer.

I tend to resort to nonsensical answers regarding elephants after a while.

oh god, we are here. DS1 is 2.8. I thought, stupidly, that we might have got away with it, but no....it was just waiting for us. We did have the "Watchoo doin' Mummy? Watchoo doin'? What we doin'? What he/she doin'?" like Lemonaid said. And that was ok, really, a bit trying but copeable with. Why? is driving me slowly bonkers...

I can manage it in the mornng, till about lunchtime, and then i start losing it. I try and answer the question as much as I can:

"Why the car go bump mummy?"
"cos the road is worn out darling"
"Why?"
"cos too many car drive here"
"Why?"
etc......

By bathtime I have had it and am down to "Just cos"

The question repeating I am sure is just for comfort, ie "Where's daddy/" "At work" "Where's daddy?" "At work" etc. Now I just say "You know where daddy is" "At work [smug smile]"

AAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHH [holds gun to head emoticon]

DT1 (3.5) has just moved on from why to 'how do you make...?' its endless - how do you make cars' 'how do you make milk' 'how do you make chitty chitty bang bang'

I found "why do you think?" (not in a sarcastic way) is a good answer to "why?" the answers can be pretty funny. dp has now refused to answer to "why" except when its part of a fuller sentance...

We had the "How do you make..?" one for ages. A difficult one, especially when they expect you to know how you make things like the sky and sheep

Now its "Who bought the bread/t-shirt/cat/sofa/book.....?"

I had this with a gorgeous mindee 2.2 years every time we went in the car I would get

'Shosha what you doing' over and over again.

So on the way to school I got in first 'R what you doing in'

'I in the car' came the reply

Again 'R what you doing in'

'I in the car'

Again 'R what you doing in'

'I IN THE CAR' Hands over face in exasperation.

He never asked again

DD is 3.4yrs i get from the time she wakes up to when she goes to bed.

Why? x 100 for everything
What you/we doing? x 100 for everything
Who's that? x 100 for everything
where's daddy/nanny? x 100 for everything

and the lastest is what thats made of? x 100 for everything

Todays question is what are humans made from, now if anyone can give me answer for a 3 year old, i would be very grateful as any answers i have come with today are just not good enough.

It's called Echolalia and they can't help it . It usually persists until about 3 - 3.5 yo.

DS is 4 and still at it. We get 'why is it a cat?' to which I say 'because its mummy and daddy are cats'. Seems to do the trick.

I haven't come up with a suitable answer for inanimate objects eg 'why is it a rock?'. Anyone else know?

The whys in our house, after being answered, are now followed with very early stages of sarcasm...eg.

Dh "you've got a party invitation here, from X at nursery"
ds "why"
dh "because they want you to go to their party"
ds "oh, that will be nice then"

it is a stage kids go throu, my three are 13, 13 & 10 and we still get why all the time and the same questions all the time, they have autism and i do wonder if the whys will ever go.

The other thing to try sometimes is to turn the question back on them and ask "Well, what do you think?" Works quite well for "What are you doing?" or "Why?" sorts of questions, not so well for endlessly repeated "Will you read me this book?" questions.