I have 2 children, Lennon James (4) and Scarlett ivy (3). One Friday a month my mum gets them from school/nursery and has them over night and my partners mum gets them late Saturday and has them until about 4ish (sometimes the nannies change who's having them to sleep and who's taking them out). So firstly I feel guilty about that because I don't see them for a full day and a half but me and my other half spend that needed quality alone time plus it's our mums and dads who come up with the idea to ensure they spend the quality alone time with their grandkids at least once a month. So firstly I want to know your opinion on that.
Secondly, me and my other half make sure the children do something fun every weekend whether that be going to the park, the Zoo, a farm, Bowling, a play area or sometimes they just have their friends/cousins round to play. Although as they are boy and girl they are very very different and they enjoy different things. Lenny loves the cinema and roller skating, which Scarlett obviously is too young for. Scarlett on the other hand loves going for food in restaurants and getting her nails done at a saloon (mummy's obviously not good enough).. these things Lenny would get bored of due to him being the active age of 4.
So when Lenny is at football or boxing classes me or my other half take Scarlett to do the things she loves and when Scarlett is at dancing or swimming me or my other half take Lenny to do the things he loves. I feel like me and my partner are going behind our kids backs because I'll tell them not to tell each other, which they slip up all the time and that then causing tantrums. Am I doing something wrong and is there any advise?