fussy eater - help me understand

[IamAporcupine]

I would really appreciate feedback/opinions from other parents with fussy eaters.

my DS (just turned 6yo) is a fussy/picky eater. His diet is not terribly restricted but there are only 3 vegetables and a few fruits in the list. Food can't touch each other, no sauces, the usual business.

Despite all this, he has recently been willing to try a few things. We have a notebook that we use every time he tries something new and we write words to describe it (crunchy, juicy, etc) and then the final 'verdict' - I liked it/I didn't like it.

So far so good. I thought we were making progress.

Now, the problem is that whenever I try to give him something (he approved) for the second time, he goes into panic mode. He just can not eat it. He says he is scared. We just had this with a tomato; ended in tears.......

I know it is not the taste or the texture - he tried it before and was ok with it. It is something else and I can't figure out what. Feels a bit like a control issue. As if he couldn't let go?

I know every child is different, and there will be millions of different reasons why they are fussy eaters, but has anyone experienced something similar? Did you manage to work out what was causing the distress?

I feel if I could say 'DS you are actually scared of XYZ' then the fussiness would be gone

My son was incredibly fussy and would have melt downs etc. We tried charts, keeping a diary etc and to be honest nothing worked ( he wouldnt even eat chocolate he had never tried before), so I stopped stressing and what a difference, I find the less pressure the more he tries. He is still fussy by lots of people's standards but considering he would only eat sausage and chips, toast and some fruits at 4 now he is 7 and he eats a wide variety. I just ask that he tries a little of whatever I am eating a small baby sized pot and we do not do this every day. It takes lots of paitence and even when I am tired and unwell I have to keep my paitence and not shout.

thanks schmoozypoo
I agree and pressure didn't work for us before, but now it feels as if he wanted to try/change - that's why I am being more persistent.

Yesterday he tried cucumber. After the second bite he said with a big smile: I actually like it, it's quite refreshing. But four hours later he was all tears at just the sight of it.....

It us so hard when they are fussy, I felt at times I was going mad. My son used to say him and then the next time scream. The anxiety he would get though was the most upsetting. There is something called sensory food aversion have you looked into that? Some if the information might help.

Say yum stupid predictive text

thanks!
I've had a quick look - he definitely seems to feel tastes more intensely.
But I still think his anxiety comes from something else