4 year old DS needs assessing

[Kbuck93]

My 4 year old DS has just started school last month, he's had real trouble with the social side of things. Cried for the first 2 weeks, needed dragging in at drop off, wouldn't interact and cried all day, etc. He has improved but his teacher brought me in for a talk this morning expressing her concerns. She said he avoids eye contact, hates any sort of changes throughout the day, lacks any confidence, prefers to play on his own although will play in a group with her encouragement. He regularly gets upset and says he doesn't want anyone to look at him. She has asked my consent to bring someone into school to assess him and his needs. She did say he is way ahead academically and he shocks her with how much he knows and understands but he really struggles socially.

Just wondering if anyone else has been through this? Also if anyone has any idea what it could be? Teacher said the referral could take a while but I'm hoping it won't be too long as I want to get some support in place for him.

Well, some of things you're describing sound potentially a bit autism-spectrummy. That combination of high intelligence, social difficulty and need for consistency and routine might be signs of Asperger's Syndrome. Whatever the issue turns out to be (or if there is no issue at all!) the fact that he will play with encouragement is a very good sign for the future. And he is still very young and the teacher is already on the ball so even if it takes a while to get the assessments done (and I've been there and done that and getting assessments can be a painfully slow process!) it sounds as if he will get the help the needs to do well in school and enjoy it.

It could be Asperger's syndrome. However, it also may be nothing because he's very young and it's early days for settling in to school. It's really positive that his teacher has picked up on it so quickly and is sorting the assessments now. It's a really long process so the quicker it can be started the better. She sounds like a great teacher who genuinely wants to help so even if nothing comes of it she'll be aware of his quirks and continue to support him.