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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

4 year old constantly wetting herself

11 replies

Rhayader · 23/05/2017 22:26

My DD has been dry since she was about 2-and a 1/2 (day and night) with only occasional accidents. She had a small regression when her brother was born a year ago but other than that we have had no problems.

Recently she has begun to wet herself and keep it a secret. Nursery often tell me that she wet herself but for the last few of weeks she is always wet when I pick her up (as well as accidents in the day) and when I have her at home she can wet herself 4-5 times in a day. Ive stayed fairly calm about it, just saying "never mind, try to do a wee on the toilet next time" and getting her new clothes. I've also been stepping up the praise when she does make it to the toilet.

I thought this would just be a phase that lasted a week tops but it doesn't seem to be stopping. She's not remotely upset when it happens. I'm completely at a loss of what to do. She starts school in September and I can't send her in with 4/5 changes of clothes... has anyone got over this? What helped? She has been dry so long I just can't understand it.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Wolfiefan · 23/05/2017 22:27

UTI?

Note3 · 23/05/2017 22:30

I was gonna say UTI as well.

Sadly you also need to consider whether there's possibility of sexual abuse as wetting the self can be a sign (I don't say this to panic you)

3luckystars · 23/05/2017 22:34

Is she constipated?

If so then try movicol and see if the wetting stops.

MrsELM21 · 23/05/2017 22:41

UTI? Possibly take her to the GP just to make sure nothing medical is causing it?

If nothing medical then maybe it's time to get the reward charts/incentives out...

Wolfiefan · 23/05/2017 22:45

Also prompt her to go. First thing, before going to nursery, before each meal, if she's been playing for a while, before you go out etc.

Original poster

Rhayader · 23/05/2017 22:51

UTI is possible I've not had her checked out but she hasn't complained about any pain etc. What are the other symptoms?

Not constipated, she's still managing to do all her poos on the toilet and she's still pretty proud of those.

I have been prompting her to go but she will say she doesn't need to go. I'm not sure whether to force her to try which would make the whole experience quite negative.

Sexual abuse seems like quite an extreme possibility. She's very happy and this is the only thing that has changed about her and her routine.

OP posts:

3luckystars · 23/05/2017 23:08

You can be blocked up and still go every day. But If you are absolutely positive she is not constipated then get her checked by he gp as it might be a kidney infection.

GrassWillBeGreener · 23/05/2017 23:31

Maybe prompting her to go needs to change back to "time to go" for a bit. Not making it negative, just being matter of fact and building it into routine.

In fact, thinking about it, you could make it a "getting ready for school" thing - tell her that it will be really good if she can think ahead and use breaks at school rather than waiting till she's urgent. So "let's practise trying to go at set times" and see what happens.

Note3 · 24/05/2017 06:13

Rhay - glad to hear abuse is unlikely. Sorry to suggest it but I work in a field where we are trained to recognise sudden bedwetting as a sign so for me it's early on my consideration as I work with it I guess.

Hopefully you can get a solution from some of the ones suggested above

nocutsnobuttsnococonuts · 24/05/2017 06:31

My dd did this too just before starting school and goes through phases now in reception. I've put it down to anxiety - whilst school is a good few months away it's easy to start talking about it 'your a big girl now etc' and puts pressure on them about something which is largely unknown and a little scary to them. I work in a preschool too and a little bit of regression is common this time of year amongst those starting school - whether this is toilet issues, tantrums or a need for comfort items. Try and tone down the 'prep for school stuff and talk September is a long way away especially to a 4 year old.

Also silly as it is blackcurrant based squash or juice can cause children to be unable to hold their wee as well causing accidents. I notice if dd has some she tends to have an accident. I can't remember what it is that's in it that causes it.

SofiaAmes · 24/05/2017 06:37

My dd was pretty much dry by 22 months but would have accidents whenever she started at a new school or something was making her anxious or sometimes when she was focusing on something and forgot to pee. She was 7 or 8 before it stopped.

You should also get your dd checked for a UTI and also pinworms (they can spread from the anus to the vagina, I've read).

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