Boisterous 6 Year Old Boy

[TheRealGracePoole]

My 6 year old boy is really sensitive, kind, loving and has loads of empathy. He loves dinosaurs and lego and always has bits of lego to fiddle with in his pocket.

His is also very tall, not very coordinated and a bit lively.

His teacher told me today he has been in trouble at school for boisterous play a few times lately. She told me it was not malicious and normal for boys of his age.

I asked him about it and he said had been in trouble 4 times for hurting someone else and it is always the same person. I had actually seen him playing with this boy and thought it looked a bit rough and I mentioned it to him, and I think a teacher at the time and they brushed it of as just boys play.

Maybe it is partly I am noticing my little boy growing up, maybe I am scared that if I don't nip it in the bud he will end up being really rough and no one will want to play with him but I am really upset about it.

Any tips on how to best deal with this?

Could you encourage other friendships? Is there a less boisterous boy that you could invite around for tea?

Also, what is he watching? My usually lovely DS watched power rangers at a similar age and got to,d off for rough play. We stopped him watching the show and he calmed down.

Are you doing all of the usual stuff like making sure he gets tons of exercise? Starting a martial arts class together might teach him some boundaries. What do you think?

I would really agree with making sure he is not watching fighty tv shows. That sets my son off badly, and especially fighty computer games. If he's getting too wild, then stopping screen time entirely and playing lots of board games like monopoly and articulate helps a lot, and lots and lots of talking time. If you can get to the park for running around that's great but the most important thing is to cut out the screen time. Does any of that seem plausible for you situation?

Martial arts are good for teaching skills and discipline because you have to be careful not to hurt others so there's focus on self-control, my DS (8) does Taekwondo but I think they all have a similar ethos.

DS is similar, can be too rough and is clumsy, can hurt others without meaning to. We went through a phase when DH had to wrestle with him, because he kept trying to wrestle his sisters who were not very keen! We also got a trampoline in the garden and if he is getting too wild we tell him to go jump it off.

I think there is a need in boys for physical contact and rough and tumble play - however they do need to learn the boundaries of what is acceptable and what isn't. I have read a few articles about this - can't remember where though - will try and find them.

If he is clumsy like my DS one tip is look for solo sports rather than team sports. Football was totally demoralising for him because everyone got so cross with him, however he enjoys swimming, martial arts, climbing.

elektra solo sports is a good suggestion. They're not just for the clumsy though, my DS just doesn't like games where you get tackled like football or rugby.

TheReal it might be worth seeing what your local cricket club has on offer. Cricket season will soon be upon us and most cricket clubs will have a session for this age where they play games and run around one evenings a week and you get to sit in the sun and drink

Other good non-combat sports are climbing and swimming. Have you got his name down for Beavers too?