Thumb or dummy?

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

nutcracker · 14/06/2004 18:56

You may not have a choice as she could make her own mind up.
My mom reckons i would not have a dummy but was quite happy to suck my thumb.

My Ds (18mths) has always had a dummy until last week when he completly refused it, and now won't have it anywhere near him.

If you'd prefer her to have a dummy than her thumb, then try her with it again, but if she refuses in preference of her thumb, then don't worry to much it'll be fine.

hana · 14/06/2004 18:56

ohhh for every person that says thumb there will be another saying dummy!!
My dd sucks her thumb - has since about the same age as your dd and she's nearly 3 now. Thumb sucking doesn't cause any problems until permanent teeth are in, but having said that, they are every so slightly pushed out already.....I don't worry about it as the worst that could happen would be braces. Too many other things to worry about!
will see what others say now!

Mirage · 14/06/2004 19:40

Hi Yorkiegirl.

I hate dummies & swore that no child of mine would ever have one.Famous last words,as DD was a very sucky baby too & I don't know where we would have been without the wretched dummy.I only let her have it when she needed it & never in her cot & she was fine with it.

However,by 12 weeks or so,she found her thumb & I was happy to bin the dummy.She only sucks her thumb now (9.5 months) when she is tired or anxious,so your DD may be the same.At least with thumbs,you don't have to get up at night to put them back in.My poor friend got up more than 20 times one night to re-dummy her son.She threw it away the next day.

Original poster

Yorkiegirl · 14/06/2004 19:42

Message withdrawn

OP posts:

gloworm · 14/06/2004 19:46

dd is 7mths and has been sucking her thumb from the word go....wild horses would get it out of her mouth now
she only seems to do it when she is tired or teething though

AussieSim · 14/06/2004 19:53

My DS was give a dummy originally but switched to thumb. When he started sucking his thumb was when he started sleeping through. I like the thumb better myself, although we have had problems as it aggravates his eczema, but I think it is more natural. I did try to wean him off his thumb back onto his dummy and he wouldn't have it at all. My DS only sucks his thumb when he is tired and I don't need to pin a dummy to his clothing every time we leave the house.

sobernow · 14/06/2004 19:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

discordia · 14/06/2004 20:01

I'd say "whatever gets you through the night"! The fact that you can get rid of the dummy might make it easier to give up. On the other hand, a thumb is easier to find at night and there's not much danger of losing it! As nutcracker said, the final decision will probably be your dd's!

lydialemon · 14/06/2004 21:12

As a 33 yr old thumbsucker, I would say go with the dummies if you can. I have tried so hard to stop, but as soon as I'm tired or stressed it pops back in all by itself

The only good thing is that at least its a habit thats not going to kill me, although I do have two different shaped thumbs!

Gem13 · 14/06/2004 21:26

I didn't give either of mine (22 months and 4 months) dummies and both suck their thumbs. DD (4 months) has just discovered hers and the joy of sleep .

DS is a big thumb sucker (and hair twirler) and I like the fact that he can comfort himself if tired.

Was anti-dummy pre-children (have relaxed my views now) but am relieved I didn't give them one as friends have been woken up so many times in a dummy hunt whereas mine use their thumbs to sleep through.

minkmama · 14/06/2004 22:03

I agree with Aussiesim - in fact sounds just like DS1! However with the arrival of DS2, at times nothing could console him not even me holding him, so the dummy it had to be. Initially wary, he's now taken to it like a fish to water, but having to re-dummy is a tiring business so I still prefer the thumb. It also means that DS1 sucks less e.g. whilst playing or during outings. I was anti-dummy before, but at the end of the day, do whatever makes your life easier and comforts the child best. Worry about weaning later!

P.S. DS1 (the thumbsucker) also has a comfort rabbit whose ears are deteriorating but at least it's another form of comfort, but make sure you get two of anything in the event of loss!!

Slinky · 14/06/2004 22:10

I gave all 3 dummies as I wanted to discourage thumb-sucking - as I was an avid thumbsucker from birth to 14 years old.

Ruined my teeth and "bite" in my mouth, needing 4 teeth to be removed before 3 years worth of "braces" had to be fitted which were hell!

Chatted to my dentist before I had kids about thumbs/dummies - she personally preferred dummies as they were easier to "control".

All 3 have had dummies from birth, I restricted their use during the day to only "sleep/tired" times and all 3 gave them up quite happily around the age of 2.5. I never got up several times a night to put dummy back in - mine used to suck them to go off to sleep, but didn't seem that bothered if they disturbed during the night.

cuppy · 14/06/2004 22:16

Stuggled not to give dd a dummy - but she was definately sucky - didnt want her to have one purely cos I didnt want to have to keep getting up in the night to put it back in , like a plug.

She found her thumb at 10 weeks but only sucks it when tired and literlally just for 1 min before she falls asleep.

clary · 15/06/2004 14:28

Yes Slinky, my dentist does sharp intake of breath when he sees my 3...all suck thumbs, inc DS1 who is 5 this week! However he only does it when tired (twirls hair too, gem13) and I've been etlling him to stop for the last few months, seems to be working. I too dislike dummies (esp in the day in the mouth of a 3yo) but do agree with others that at least you can throw it away I suppose...DD has bad skin and very sore sucked thumb. But then I know many who have had to get up all night which is a bad habit to start, isn't it? At least mine all sleep through all night, think I'll live with a bit of dry skin/braces to have that!

Aero · 15/06/2004 14:37

Echo slinky re dummies. Used only for sleep and comfort (after a fall or whatever). Had no real problems giving up around 2.5 years either for my two. No 3 has just nodded off to sleep without his though - he's not so keen and often puts his fingers in his mouth. I keep trying with the dummy and he does take it though I get the feeling his fingers would be his preference if allowed. Let's face it, I can't stop him if he does decide on fingers over dummy. He;'s 5mths old now!

hebetalbot · 15/06/2004 15:16

My DD is 6 months old and sucks her thumb when tired or hungry. She also like to use me as a comfort. Will she outgrow using the breast or should i try to wean her off?

Davros · 15/06/2004 20:10

I didn't give either of mine dummies and neither suck their thumbs (so far). DS, who is nearly 9 and autistic, screamed and screamed as a baby but I preferred to try to deal with the behaviour and the reason for the behaviour (little did I know then that I would still be following those principles many years later). I think dummies are just soooo ugly and I don't like the idea of "shutting them up" with one. Many of my friends have used them though.

muminlondon · 15/06/2004 20:22

I never liked the look of dummies but now I can't stop DD's finger sucking (middle two fingers) and hair twirling. She found her fingers at about 3 months, gave up temporarily at 9 months then restarted at 13 months. But it's interesting to see when she needs it - often when she's frustrated or sulking after I've stopped her from doing something. It seems more grown-up to be self-comforting. We'll see about braces later.

Ouisie · 15/06/2004 20:24

I would love my DD to suck her thumb as she is very sucky but she just chews it in the corner of her mouth. She used to have a dummy but I got rid of it when I was getting up every hour to replace it. She still doesn't sleep through and uses me as comfort. I'm trying to wean her off me and even gave her another dummy in desperation but now she won't have a bar of the dummy! Help - has anyone got this problem?

Hulababy · 15/06/2004 20:32

I gave DD a dummy as she was a sucky baby and it seemed to help her colic in the evenings where other things didn't. She has only ever had a dummy for pure comfort or sleeping though, not other times and as she has got older the amount of time she has a dummy has been severely reduced. She is now 2y2m and for past year or more she has only had a dummy for sleeping, and definitely never when talking - my pet hate

Now we need aloha here I think - for the research on the benefits of using a dummy. I can't remember what thread it was in.

poppyseed · 15/06/2004 20:33

Haven't read all of this thread but I fed both of ours and so didn't want to alter the sucking technique (I think that you can now buy soothers that are supposed to mimic a nipple??) and neither of them sucked a thumb, had a blanket or anything like this at all. DD was an awful baby (sorry!) as she cried so much but DS is the complete opposite and laid back! There were times that I wished that they had had a soother but then again both of them have been able to 'put themselves to sleep' at night without crying for me to help them.

Hulababy · 15/06/2004 20:33

Here it is :

"SIDS cot death: essential info for parents

Get the latest info on SIDS cot death from the 2000 SIDS Conference.

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome it is a terrible enigma that visits itself on thousands of families every year, devastating them beyond repair. It is a reality so horrible that we simply refer to it by its acronym SIDS. One day a beautiful healthy baby, the next a dead infant. Medical authorities have been wrestling with the why questions for many decades. In recent times some of their long held theories have been turned on their head. So, what is the current state of medical opinion with regard the causes and preventative measures related to Cot Death? Recently an International Convention on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome was held in Auckland, New Zealand. Their findings are summarised below:
(1) Passive smoking has been shown to be a leading factor in cases of cot death. Studies show that a baby with just one parent who smokes is 5 times more likely to suffer from cot death than one with neither parent who smokes. According to world authority Dr, Joyce Epstein of the British Foundation for the Study of Cot Death, If we could remove all smoking from a babys environment we estimate that cot deaths will reduce by 61 %.

(2) It has been observed that babies who suck on pacifiers have about half the risk of cot death than those who dont. The experts dont know why but the figures are quite conclusive. "

poppyseed · 15/06/2004 20:40

That's statistics for you - nobody knows why but if there's a link they'll prove it!!

Hulababy · 15/06/2004 20:42

Have to say that I never had to return DD's dummy at all. We co-slpet in the beginning anyway so no need, and once in cot (or on her own) she could do it herself.

sanssouci · 15/06/2004 20:47

I say dummy. At least you can take it away from time to time.