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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Please advise re Six month old throwing proper temper tantrums

19 replies

eenybeeny · 09/02/2007 13:29

Hiya - well the subject line says it all. My 6 month old DS (who was one month prem) has developed a pretty nasty temper. He is normally adorable and smiley and happy baby but increasingly lately if something sets him off he has a horrible temper tantrum. It's really angry and he screams at the top of his lungs.

Is this normal for a 6 month old? He is my first baby so I dont know. Some friends have remarked on it as if it is abnormal. I am a little worried because mental illness runs in the family and a part of me is scared he has a serious problem although I think logically that is pretty drastic stuff for a 6 month old. Your thoughts would be appreciated.

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KezzaG · 09/02/2007 13:30

I woul say that a 6 month old cannot have a tantrum. He may well be tired, frustrated, annoyed etc but the only way he can express it is through crying. I definately think he is too young to tantrum in the way a 2 yo could.

If you are worried maybe your HV can put your mind at rest.

Original poster

eenybeeny · 09/02/2007 13:31

My HV just sort of shrugs her shoulders. One thing that always sets him off is changing his clothes or his nappy. It's really dreadful he screams until he makes himself choke. I am so worried about him.

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Original poster

eenybeeny · 09/02/2007 13:35

bump

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Dragoninawagon · 09/02/2007 13:36

Eeny sounds exactly like my ds.

Think it is exactly what Kezza says just frustration he doesn't want you doing what your doing so he will scream as that is that only way he can say no.

My ds is 9 months and is starting to calm down a bit think he realises well its just tough cause mum is going to carry on whether i scream or not.

HTH

PrettyCandles · 09/02/2007 13:48

Some babies realy do dislike being undressed/dressed, or having nappy changes. It could be that they're startled, don't lik the feeling of the clothes being dragged oveer their faces, don't like the cold changing mat, or the feeling of being pinned-down whrn they're discovering their mobility and the use of their limbs.

See whether you could do things in a different way/place/time (maybe by the time he's being dressed he's ready for a sleep/feed and therefore has less tolerance). Or have you tried giving him something to hold that he loves but only evergets on the changing mat? It could be a toy, or even a rusk. When he starts screaming, do you contiue or do you stop? Whichever it is, try doign the opposite.

Original poster

eenybeeny · 09/02/2007 15:40

It seems like we have tried everything from distractions to letting it take an hour to change his clothes. That isnt the only thing that sets him off though it is just one example.

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 09/02/2007 15:42

DS is 22 months and still hates being dressed/undressed/having his nappy changed.

Some just dont like it.

PinkTulips · 09/02/2007 15:49

sounds harsh but just keep going. ignore the screaming and do the change as quick as possible and get it over with.

it serves 2 purposes, it lets them know there's no point giving out and it gets it over and done quicker for your sake.

he's just being opinionated and letting you know he doesn't like something and is probably picking up on the fact it's upsetting/stressing you.

a temper tantrum happens when they're older and they work themselves into a real frenzy and cannot be reasoned with or calmed down.... if he stops crying if he gets his way it's not a tantrum.

wrinklytum · 09/02/2007 15:50

I think this is pretty usual.As prev poster said doubt its a proppre "tantrum" though,prob the only way he can express his dislike!!!dd is like this and always has been re getting dresses and getting out the bath!!!hth.In summer,in hot weather you could maybe just let him roam around in a nappy,both of mine loved this,am a bit worried I have bred a couple of naturists

Must go as dd is systematically destroying a packet of wipes,her current favourite pastime

wrinklytum · 09/02/2007 15:50

Proper,even!

wrinklytum · 09/02/2007 15:52

and "dressed" was typing fast.btw would second what pink tulips said,do it as fast as poss and ignore the screams,else you will be there forever.Wait til the toddler stage.They develop a million and one seemingly irrational dislikes.....

KezzaG · 09/02/2007 15:59

Sorry eeny had to type and run earlier. Im trying to think back as to whether ds was like this, I know he certainly had some things he hated doing, getting dressed after bath was one of them. I agree with the getting it over with as quickly as possible school of thought if distraction doesnt work. I bet if you anticipate the crying coming he can pick up on it as well.

If your HV isnt concerned I reckon it all sounds pretty normal

PinkTulips · 09/02/2007 15:59

yes.... such as mommy is no longer qualified to blow noses, she'd prefer to eat drink her own snot if daddy isn't there to do it and of course daddy can't do bedtimes, only mommy knows how to tuck her in

KezzaG · 09/02/2007 16:02

LOL PinkTulips, I am right in the middle of a mummy only bedtime phase. I thought I would really enjoy that he loved me so much but being the focus of toddler OCD type behaviour can be exhausting!!

Eeny, I found what to ecpect in the first year a really helpful book, lots of sensible advice and Q&A section for each month.

PinkTulips · 09/02/2007 16:06

loved that book too kezza..... lots of really sensible advice and i don't think there's any aspect of babyhood they haven't covered.

(i know, and to think i used to be jealous of her favouring dp! had to laugh yeaterday though.... her teacher tried to put her coat on and she snatched it from her and handed to me without a word... just 'that' look )

PrettyCandles · 09/02/2007 16:39

Another thought eeny - is he gettting enough daytime sleep? I would expect at this age a couple of naps totalling about 3h. Overtiredness can lead to meltdowns.

Original poster

eenybeeny · 13/02/2007 13:51

Thanks all for your thoughts. The last few days havent been as bad. I just feel like I cant go out with him because he could kick off at any minute.

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UniSarah · 13/02/2007 21:51

go out. even if he kicks off, hes not the only baby to throw hissy fits at things not being exactly as they want. Mine (now 11m/o, but hes been doing it since about 6) screams the place down about half the times I do his pushchair straps up when we are out. Mums and tots crew don;t bat an eye lid at the noise and tears i have some weeks with my lad at home time enough of them of them have been there and done that and are glad their 2 year old has grown out of it.
friends who think its werid need a reminder that its normal for YOUR boy at the moment even if it wasn;t for theirs. Hes letting you know hes not happy about what hes experienceing, just doing it at full volume.

Original poster

eenybeeny · 14/02/2007 15:45

Thanks for the reassurance UniSarah

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