What is your two-year-old's slogan?

[NotQuiteCockney]

Mine has two:

• me no like it
• me do it

He can pretty much get by on just those two statements.

Message withdrawn

mummy where ARE you?

no NOT

"Five minutes...." (inherited from me )

'OR NOT!'

'THATS MINE!'

"No way"

forgot his other favourite

" X is noy (annoying) me"

X can be DD, the cat, weather, rug, piece of cheese......anything basically!

Hmmm, where are the freaky positive two-year-olds? I want to hear about a two-year-old whose slogan is "this is lovely!" or "let's do it now!"

Oh, DS2 does say "here, NOW" when he really wants something. I suspect he may be copying me there.

Hmmm my ds are qquite funny atm:

• did ye see that??
• what doing?
• Di yoo wanna come ti ma house?
• Wee minute

'wee minute' is my ds too while putting his hands up in front of him.

and when he wants something of mine mine - 'we need to shaaaaare'

'no' said in a mourneful tone of voice
'sasha do it!' if we dare to try and do something for her
'cadgee ok?' if ds is crying

Mine's three but shouts 'oh BOTHER' a lot in a disappointed tone of voice when something minor happens like stubbing his toe or dropping something. Makes me giggle as it is just so obvious that he's using it where an adult would use a swearword...

I don't want a like to!

Oh and, "Maaybe not" to virtually any request.

21 month old DD....
Ohhhh Bother! (That will be me then)

"oopsadaisy"
"Not funny" (to be said with in a gruff, huffy, stuck-out-lower-lip sort of voice)
"ooh, big burp" (to be said in a blokeish sort of voice)
"what is it?" (while brandishing tampax/mooncup/anything embarrassing in Mummy's handbag over his head)

DD's current favourites are -

'dont talk to me I'm being grumpy today!'
'a wee minute'
'but we can just share it' (only if its something of yours or someone elses - not usually hers)
'I'm not xx I'm bootiful' xx is usually cheeky, silly or anything but beautiful.

-want it please
-little rascal (usually at himself while shaking his head sadly, it is f&cking hilarious)
-oh dear
-mummy do it
-lights on/off (we generally have a running commentary on any of the lights in the vicinity
-what's that
-ok

yes there's a lot, but dear god the child never shuts up, but then neither do me or dp

def
'i don't want to ........'

baby cwying - usually in the car! normally proceeds to bop cwying (stop crying) Never works when he says it either!!

"No, I actually do not like XXX, I actually like YYY"

or

"NO, I will NOT do as my told!" [sic]

or

"No, I am not XXX, I am a sausage roll/Grandad/bowl of custard etc"

He's a fruitcake like his mummy

"I'll be just one minute Mummy..." when I ask him to do anything

"I'LL do it....."

"What doin mammy?"

"Want neenar!" (dinner)

"mammy byootful"

"oh, did fart"

"Uff you mammy"

"My cair, not your cair, my cair!!" [my sister is Clare]

NO!

and

'I wanna come...out/down/up' depending on where he is and and it is said at increasingly loud volume when he's not taken out/down/picked up immediately...