What to do when your 5yo starts lying?

[chicaguapa]

That old chestnut!

DD has a very strong sense of right and wrong and I have always trusted her implicitly. However, in the last month or so she has started lying. I appreciate that this is a normal part of development and didn't expect to escape it, but would like to know what I do about it.

I have very strong views about lying and want to teach DD in the right way that it's not acceptable. Probably because my mum & sister have a very deceptive streak which is now apparent in my niece (also 5). She came to stay recently and would lie rather than tell the truth about anything at all. When she lied to me about taking something - I told her, in front of DD, that lying was not acceptable in my house and if she carried on lying to me, she'd have to go home!

I know DD has been trying to work out the difference between tricking someone (eg telling her peas are raindrops from Greenland a la Charlie & Lola) and telling a lie.

She has also started borrowing things from school which I will speak to her teacher about.

Answering my own question here!

This site gives lots of good advice, most of which I've read on the other threads.

It's worth a look if you're having the same problem.

thank your lucky stars it happened so late? or that at least you realise they are lying? sorry - no ideas here but am off to check out your link in a minute. ds1 started proper fibs when 3 and it always annoyed me that a mate of mine still thought her 7 year old always told the truth. as if!! I think ds1 is cut out to be a politician or diplomat in future life, he is so good at it already and only just turned 4. ah well, every family has its black sheep.

Well I know definitely she has just started and I expect other mums thought I was being naive! DD has never been text-book though so I have always found it hard to get the right advice specific to her. But this seems quite straightforward so fingers crossed.

is your DD telling actual lies (I didn't break / take that, etc) or making up stories (a policeman came to school today looking for people to arrest and Miss R, reception teacher, has put so-and-so's name on a list to be arrested')?

There's a big difference, imo.

Hi, usborne books have a book called dont tell lies lucy, along with some other books aboout being greedy, taking things that arent yours and bullying. they are £4.99 each and well worth the investment. if your interested i can send you the ISBN numbers for the books

Laura

i usually say that mummy dosent like it when ds ' makes things up'. Mummy will find out the real thing anyway, so why upset her twice? Has worked so far!!

Hello! She's telling lies of the variety - I didn't do that, so and so did it. She knows it's wrong to lie - there's no ambiguity there. So I'm hoping the phase won't last long.

I mentioned it to her teacher who did a circle time discussion on lying and stealing. (DD had taken some stuff from school and blamed it on her friend.)