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Original poster

how to stop the fucking crying!!!!

106 replies

RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 17:21

I'm literally at my wits end. I'm going to lose the plot. My DD2 is 14 weeks and never fucking shuts up. I literally am not coping. I've just made cupcakes with DD1 and she screamed and screamed and screamed. I can't cope. I really wanted to hurt myself and scream and cry in sheer exasperation. I can't cope anymore. I feel like I hate my life and wished I had stopped at Dd1.

I know, very deep down that I love this little beautiful baby so so much and would never ever hurt any of them, I justfeel on the bottom, and genuinely feel like I'm not coping with life. I can't enjoy dd1 at all anymore cause DD2 is so much of a handful.

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BringBackCabinPressure · 25/05/2015 18:57

Might be worth looking into cows milk protein intolerance - soya often also causes problems if so as the proteins are similar. The special formula is expensive prescription only

BertieBotts · 25/05/2015 18:58

Cow and Gate Comfort perhaps? Or SMA Staydown?

Posseting is the little sicks newborns sometimes do, not full on projectile vomit, just bringing bits of milk back up.

Def worth asking for allergy checking, or prescription for non dairy milks.

Tandemitis · 25/05/2015 18:58

BabyBjorns aren't great for their comfort either as their legs are left dangling. I have a Connecta - really comfy right from her being two weeks old (she's now ten months). I have a bad back and shoulder and can still carry her in the Connecta for ages without it hurting.

Iggly · 25/05/2015 18:59

I would suspect reflux tbh. Possible cows milk intolerance - if she is always crying.

My dd (second DC) lived in the sling for the first 3-4 months. Sometimes it was the only way to keep her happy. I did a lot of walking - which my eldest was happy about as he loved the park! He got pretty good at walking for a 2-3 year old. And dd did well - kept her happy. By 5 months she was a champion napper just about anywhere (but rubbish at night!)

Both of mine has reflux and dd has tongue tie too so was constantly miserable until she got older. The sling made it bearable.

Iggly · 25/05/2015 19:00

Oh and I got a proper sling - a manduca. Had the Bjorn with my first and it wasn't great.

MadgeMak · 25/05/2015 19:00

I agree with previous posters in that you need a sling, and a decent one that you can carry her in for long periods of time. Your best bet is to go along to a sling library and find one that suits you. My DC2 was in the sling all day everyday bar when being fed for the first six months of his life. He barely cried and I nap there too so I just carried on with my life as normal with my eldest. She won't become reliant on it, my son stopped napping in the sling at around six months and went into his cot no problem. We only now use the sling out and about in places I don't want to take the pushchair. Forget about any rod for your own back rubbish, just do what you need to do in the present moment to get through it.

catellington · 25/05/2015 19:12

This

With this

www.b2boutique.co.uk/Little_Frog_Sand_Agate_V2.html size 6 for me size 12, 5foot 3

I have a 5 week old and 2.4 yo, it is a nightmare but the sling gives us sometimes a couple of good hours. Bit of a learning curve but it is worth it.

Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 19:17

yes Bertie she possets all of the time. all throughout the day even if she hasn't just had a feed. I'm constantly changing her clothes and bibs.

She's just woke screaming again. reckon I should try thr gaviscon again.

sling library, do. ijust Google where my nearest is?

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catellington · 25/05/2015 19:19

And this www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/1624423.htm?CMPID=GS001&_$ja=cgid:18091973005|tsid:59156|cid:189942085|lid:98860949125|nw:g|crid:69130799605|rnd:6328879738776456299|dvc:t|adp:1o2|bku:1 is the only thing my baby will go in and not cry (including any type of thing meant for sleeping and any other type if chair). She loves it.

But they are all different , but whatever works . It is really hard so I'm with you and recognise that feeling you describe Flowers and Wine

Ineedacleaningfairy · 25/05/2015 19:24

Don't worry about her wanting to be in the sling forever, I had my babies in a sling when they were little (a stretchy wrap-moby) my toddler now refuses to be carried so it really won't last forever.

As for sitting and rolling we didn't really practice, my dc1 puked every time I tried tummy time so I just held him or had him in the sling all the time, he sat at 4 months old and crawled/cruised at 6 months old, he didn't really practice he could just do it, very odd, but I think sling use improves their core strength.

I now have a toddler and baby, I too found the first few months hard, I just wouldn't have attempted baking, mostly we sat and played with duplo/brio/playmobil whilst I breastfed. I found once my baby could sit at 5 months things got so much easier, I could then put the baby in the high hair or on the floor with some cushions around him and properly play with my toddler. I don't think my toddler was particularly upset about the dull few months we had.

My advice is buy a comfy sling, watch lots of TV, eat very easy food and keep thinking to yourself things will only get easier, you have done the hardest bit already!Brew

Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 19:27

made a bottle up with gaviscon, she drank an oz-ish she's awake but not crying.

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Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 19:29

and Health Visitor is due out tomorrow, shall I mention it to her?

nobody seems to know their arse from their elbow. Shall I insist trying her on different milk? soya milk? or suggesting the prescription milk?

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fhdl34 · 25/05/2015 19:33

My DS was like this (2nd baby), he had reflux, often constipated, cried loads. If she likes the sling use one, do what works now. I had one but DS didn't like it, even though he wanted to be held constantly. It was so, so hard.

KatharineClifton · 25/05/2015 19:36

yy, sounds so similar to my DD. I feel bad now that I didn't do enough to help her as she must of been in constant pain. But I didn't know enough, and none of the health professionals offered any information to help.

BringBackCabinPressure · 25/05/2015 19:40

HVs know shit about cows milk protein intolerance in my experience, and GPs not much better. You've got to push and push. I breastfed so it was more difficult in some ways as I couldn't get gaviscon into either, but then easier as well because as soon as I went dairy and soya free I had much happier babies. Smile

Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 19:55

I feel awful Katherine especially now the gaviscon seems to have settled her for now.

my poor baby, I feel so bad, I will mention it tomorrow see what she suggests but will make an appt first thing tomorrow to see gp.

If the gaviscon seems to have worked, is that not a dairy intolerance? and more reflux? or could it just be settling the vomit from the intolerance? I know it may be neither of these things but will try all angles

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KatharineClifton · 25/05/2015 19:56

Thankfully these days there is the internet. Don't feel bad, now you know what it could be you can act on it. Flowers

BringBackCabinPressure · 25/05/2015 20:00

Well if the gaviscon helps and there are no other symptoms when she's on it it's probably reflux. May need something stronger like ranitidine as well though. If diarrhoea and vomiting and colic or eczema - then an intolerance or allergy is more likely

MadgeMak · 25/05/2015 20:03

Yes you could try googling for sling libraries or ask on a sling group on facebook as there will be many knowledgeable ladies who will know where your nearest is. Try the facebook group "sling and things - FSOT and advice".

TerrifiedMothertobe · 25/05/2015 20:05
  1. you deserve a medal
  2. sod the whole habit thing. 14 weeks is tiny
  3. keep yourself sane. If a sling works, needs must...
  4. you are doing a great job
  5. you are doing a great job 6).....
Crazyqueenofthecatladies · 25/05/2015 20:06

Op your posts are basically screaming cmpi in caps lock for me. Tell your hv what you've told us and push for a hydrolysed formula, give that a trial for a month or so and if nothing changes or it gets better but just goes to crap again push for a truly dairy free formula such as neonate. And yes to the sling at least for now. Did you get heartburn when pregnant? Did you like lying flat with it? Neither do babies suffering from reflux/cmpi.

Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 20:10

looking at this I don't understand all medical talk though - but DD has been wheezy and sneezy and croaky since day 1. constant runny nose and weepy eyes, and gets.loads of white stuff in her eyes which are sometimes.Red underneath

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Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 20:14

sorry for bad grammar in post, was flicking between Google and MN app.

Thanks for all the support, yes I did have heartburn when pregnant and it was awful Sad I didn't even know there was such a thing as a cows milk intolerance in babies. It didn't cross my mind anyrhing could be wrong, everyone jumps.on the 'ah she's spoilt' wagon when I have to get her out the pram and carry her upright so I thought they were right. I didn't consider she could be poorly. I feel really awful. She's in her cot slightly raised on a thin pillow atm. I keep checking on her. might put the gaviscon in all her bottles tonight, until I can get to the docs tomorrow

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fluffygreenmonsterhoody · 25/05/2015 20:15

V familiar. You have my greatest empathy and sympathy.

In desperation one night DH went out and bought comfort milk. The change was instant.

Also we learned a new way of winding. Sat ds upright on my lap with my hand under his chin and rotated his upper half and mine round in a clockwise motion.

Not sure if any of that helps or makes sense but I do wish you luck.

Original poster
RavioliOnToast · 25/05/2015 20:18

We've tried the comfort milkbefore when she was tiny and it didn't make a difference, she just got more diarrhoea so we changed her again. might be worth another go though

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