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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

I had just had enough of bed wetting today - can't stand it anymore

22 replies

benandhollyonrepeat · 27/04/2015 07:58

DS is nearly 8 and is wetting the bed every night - for over two years I have tried everything to get him dry, alarms, medication etc etc nothing as worked and I am left washing all his bedding every morning. This morning it is has just all got too much, I can't stand it. The smell, the pile of wet washing that I start my day with every single day - I feel I am at my wits end with it. I know it's not his fault and would never tell him any of this and do a very good show of pretending it's all fine to him etc but this morning I want to cry about it all....

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

PeaceOfWildThings · 27/04/2015 08:01

Use the big night time pull ups! It just does take longer for some, and he isn't ready to be dry at night.

MrsPeabody · 27/04/2015 08:03

I agree with using the 'nighttime pants'. I think from your op it sounds like you have already seen a gp.

Hugs and sympathy. Is it too early for wine?

Pippidoeswhatshewants · 27/04/2015 08:10

It really wears you down, doesn't it?
Ds finally grew out of it when he was 9. I third the night pull-ups.

RainbowFlutterby · 27/04/2015 08:11

DS is 10 and still not dry at night so absolutely night-time pull-ups. We use Huggies Pyjama Pants.

Superexcited · 27/04/2015 08:13

It will eventually get better (my child was a bed wetter until the age of 11).
Is there anything emotionally affecting him? For our son a lot of his bed wetting was connected to emotional struggles that he was experiencing, although it was probably partly that his bladder just wasn't ready too.
In the meantime wash bedding in dettol laundry cleanser or Milton as it helps get rid of the horrible urine smell. Get some terry waterproof sheets to protect the mattress and stop the mattress smelling. I found the terry topped waterproof sheets to be The best type and if you have a home bargains nearby they sell them for £5.99 each.
I was very reluctant to use dry nite pull ups but some people find them helpful.

gamerchick · 27/04/2015 08:13

Just put him in pull ups. It's not common they don't grow out of it. Saves all that washing.

momtothree · 27/04/2015 08:16

I used to do this... i would wake needing the loo but my legs wouldnt work... some sore of sleep hormone. I`ve seen it on tv relating to cats. No help sorry! GP maybe?

AnneElliott · 27/04/2015 08:22

I agree you should get the pants. DS only grew out of it at 8 and a half. I don't think it's something you can do anything about, you just have to wait til they're ready.

Princessdeb · 27/04/2015 08:26

Dear OP,
I am sorry you are having a tough day today. It can be really hard to keep up the "It's ok" facade when inside you want to scream. I am assuming that your son is under the local eneuresis clinic? If so I would ask for a fresh review as sometimestretreatment that didn't work before because the child wasn't developmentally ready will work later. My DD took a long time to get dry at night and in the end we decided to take the pressure off by using nappy pants. It meant that everyone felt less stressed and we could wait for her to be ready in her own time. Some professionals don't like them because they say they disincentives the child to get dry. For us though they were a lifesaver. Then, all of a sudden she had 3 consecutive dry nights in the pants. We took them off and she hasn't had them on since. We have an occasional accident (once or twice a month? ) but we haven't looked back. Sometimes you just have to wait until they are ready. Good luck x

Original poster

benandhollyonrepeat · 27/04/2015 09:35

I would love him to wear the pull ups but he gets himself into such a fizz about them that I think it actually makes the whole situation worse. He just doesn't want to be wearing pull ups at 8, I have tried taking him to the supermarket to show him that they go to age 15 and he seems like he has bought into the whole idea, we then get home and back to square one of not wanting to wear them. I don't want to force him too if it make him upset but i really can't stand the wet beds anymore - sorry for the rant just feel so down about it all this morning.

OP posts:

Superexcited · 27/04/2015 10:14

benandholly my DS didn't want to wear the pull ups either as he saw them as a nappy and nappies are for babies, he was very embarrassed at the thought of wearing a pull up and I think the embarrassment would just have made the problem worse.
What we did do was: we agreed that if he didn't want to wear the pull ups then he had to help with the constant washing and sorting things out. When he wet the bed he would be responsible for stripping the bed and putting everything in the washing machine, he didn't mind doing this. I would out a fresh duvet cover on but he would put in a fresh sheet and a fresh pilowcase and I would hang the washing to dry once the cycle had finished.
Making him be involved was not intended to be a punishment but it was intended to show him how much work was involved by not wearing a pull up and wetting the bed. We found that by giving him some responsibility of sorting out the problem the amount of wet nights were reduced until he finally got totally dry about a year later (when he was almost 11). It could all just be coincidence.

CatWithKittens · 27/04/2015 10:35

Perhaps I can repeat what I have said on another thread about a paediatrician friend, who knows how late all of ours have been to be dry at night, and who told us that there is some research which says that school age children who still have wet beds and wear nappies or some sort of nighttime protection enjoy much better sleep than those who do not - the article is at www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3022939/

CallMeNancy · 27/04/2015 10:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

susiedaisy · 27/04/2015 10:48

I hear you op. My ds1 is 17 and still has the odd wet night. But he wet the bed every night without fail from 4-14 years old despite desomelt, alarms, diet changes, me getting him up, numerous trips to specialists and dietitians.

It's soul destroying to wake up to it day after day after day. I have worn out several washing machines because of it and it's cost a small fortune in pull ups inco sheets plastic sheets two new mattresses and so much washing powder

BarbarianMum · 27/04/2015 12:19

OK, if he won't tolerate pull-ups, then try bed mats. Expensive if you need on each night but better than piles of washing. If he wets every night just put it straight on top of top sheet.

Also, get your ds to start helping - not as a punishment, but because it is a job that needs doing. He could strip the bedding that needs changing and put it, plus PJs in the washing machine and set it to run with a bit of training. And change the bed mat for a fresh one.

moonbells · 27/04/2015 13:09

We've a 7.5yo DS who has never been dry. If I were washing daily, I would go bats!

We've not even tried to do it - we work f/t so washing is done only at weekends. We plan on using pullups until he starts to have dry nights and I refuse to get stressed about this. He went on his first sleepover the other week - just told parents that he still needed pullups and they didn't bat an eyelid. The only person who seems to be bothered is MIL!

Cat I really appreciate that reference. We've never tried to wake DS for the loo as once asleep he needs an air horn to wake him but he spends most of his days absolutely shattered and so I may need to haul him to the GP at some point to see if the tiredness is linked to the NE. The linked reference about boys with NE not being easy to rouse rings lots of bells with me!

PeaceOfWildThings · 27/04/2015 14:14

I got a pack of large puppy training mats from a big pet shop (took them out of the packagi g when I got them home so DC wouldn't see). Fixed the bed mat over the middle of the bed with bungee cords around the back.

nickelbarapasaurus · 27/04/2015 14:16

can you buy some washable pullups that are more like pants but with absorbent in it?

call them his bed pants.

nickelbarapasaurus · 27/04/2015 14:16

or put some padding into the legs/crotch of his pyjamas?

mousmous · 27/04/2015 14:20

yes to pull ups.
does he help at all with the bedding?
not (entirely) about punishment, but to show him that it is difficult for you as well. my 8yo is making their own bed, it's a life skill.

BigRedBall · 27/04/2015 14:23

Hi OP, sorry I have no experience of this but it sounds very draining.

The reason why I've come on here is to say that a few months ago there was a person on here with a similar problem and people had suggested some medication from the GP to supress night time wee's. Apparently loads of other people had used them and their children were dry at night within a few months as they weaned them off the medication. I'm sure someone on the thread will know the name of the tablets.

I hope you get some luck with this.

Jasonandyawegunorts · 27/04/2015 14:26

Desmopressin is what is normally given at first.

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