Okay so I know ds is normal not to use a knife and fork at nearly 4 - but when to start asking him to?

[threebob]

He loves his food, uses a teaspoon for peas, beans, mince etc. Meat gets moved from plate to mouth at speed of light using fingers.

Should we start reminding him to use his fork to spear his meat (which always gets eaten first)?

Or should we thank our lucky stars we have a good eater and wait for him to copy us spontaneously?

FIL is starting to give us "looks", but that's never an indicator of anything. He's a miserable git.

If he sees you eating regularly with utensils I wouldn't worry too much tbh. Ds1 is the same, only he has started to use his cutlery a bit more now (to the point we're thinking of getting him a better child sized knife that has a better serated edge for cutting). He's 5. Haven't pushed it at all.

His brother, aged 2, seems to be more inclined to try and copy us than ds1 was at the same age, and likes to try to cut with his knife and use his fork. But he still prefers to use his fingers in a hurry!

I think they'll get there as long as they regularly see you using them...

It's up to you. If it bothers you I would remind him. If you can wait for him to learn by himself then leave it.

I have seen 3 year olds using a knife and fork beautifully, but I have also seen 5 year olds who can't get the hang of it.

I would give him a knife, fork and spoon with each meal so he as the option.

DD1 turned four in July and can use a knife and fork in a clumsy sort of way, but much prefers fingers.

We have started pressing the issue a bit, as she has started school and school dinners have to be eaten with cutlery. So now I remind her, and have flirted with sticker charts as an incentive, but when she's tired and grumpy I don't press the issue.

Now DD2 on the other hand, is proving a dab hand at spearing individual peas with a fork, at the age of 14 months!! It will be interesting to see whether DD1's attitude changes when her baby sister becomes better at it than her!

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DS1 is 7 and seems to prefer using his fingers.
DS2 is 3.5 and cuts his food up beautifully with a knife!

That's not much help really but just to show there is no right age. Mind you I do think that we cut DS1's food up for him for far too long (DH still sometimes does it tho I won't).

DS2 OTOH has always been left to fend for himself a bit lol as no 3, so maybe he's learned some independence!

We are veggie + fish eaters and usually only eat with forks - so my kids have no idea how to use a knife as well. I feel a bit about it and feel it's way too late for them to be learning at 6 and 4.

Oh I like this thread DD is 3.5 and invariably opts for fingers. I was starting to think she was the only one

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School will help less - lunch box eaten on a bench outside (ie not even a proper table to eat off).

ds1 is 5 in December and uses mainly a teaspoon for every meal - we always put a fork out but it usually gets neglected - don't even put a knife out (probably should).

ds2 is 2.6 and uses a fork more, (he's more keen to shovel as much as he can onto his spoon and in his mouth!) but not all the time - usually either a spoon or fingers.

We still cut up their food, but I don't think it's anything to worry about - it'll happen when it happens.