Is this normal 11yo boy behaviour?

[ChocolateEggFace]

I see a lot of posters on her saying their 11yo's organise their own social life, and my DS has just started doing this.

The trouble is is seems to be pretty disastrous.

The latest incident happened when DS asked a friend if he wanted to meet up...friend said yes, and suggested they go to the cinema today. So I dropped DS at the cinema...friend didn't turn up. It transpires another friend of theirs met up with the boy first, didn't want to go to the cinema, so the boy just blanked DS when DS texted and called him to ask where he was.

I might be more cross about this than I should be 1) because I had to drive DS across town for no reason, and 2) I was actually quite worried about the boy when he didn't respond. He's been reliable in the past, and his parents were both at work, so I was concerned something had happened to him.

I do not think it that unusual for that age group for their plans to go a bit awry.

I know my DD is much better at organising things than the boys. At 11 my DS and DSS were awful about organising anything more complex than meeting up in the park.

It was quite rude though for his friend to not communicate his change in plans.

I'd probably not let a child of this age fully organise his own social life. I'd have wanted to speak to his mum if it was me, just to double check all arrangements.

( and I've got both older and younger children. )

But I've been questioned before with face about why I have anything to do with 11yo's social life.

Other boys parents work, and give him £££ to entertain himself during the holiday. He's a very sensible, bright boy so I can see why they trust him.... butDS is like a Labrador puppy...is sad for about 2 mins, then bounces around asking if friend wants to meet up tomorrow. (It's so not happening!)

When friend finally did reply, he said he was driving, that's why he couldn't answer phone. Poor gullible DS didn't know what to make of it.

He was driving?!

No, of course he was't driving! He was trying to be funny/make a lame excuse. DS didn't understand either.

Doesn't sound much of a friend, really.

I wouldn't imagine my son being good at making arrangements. He is the same age. As someone else said, I'd also be getting a bit more involved with arrangements at this age.

I'd probably text the parents 'not sure if you know but I drove DS to the cinema to meet x today but they stood DS up. DS wondered if x had had an accident?'

We let DS (not yet at high school, aged 11) go to his friends' house a 5 min walk away, or out to play if someone calls, but I would always confer with the parent if they wanted to make bigger plans like the cinema - not that he's asked/been asked yet. DS doesn't have a phone yet but I'm thinking he probably ought to get one pretty soon as he spreads his wings.