I don't have enough patience for a 2 year old!

[milkyman]

My sweet, lively DS has been replaced with a difficult, trantrumy, foot stamping pain. I know this is normal but I find it really hard to cope with. Everyday is a battle. Hes big and strong for his age but has very little speech, just the usual, no, mine, more, ball etc.., he understands everything.

He is today obsessed with wearing a hat he had as a baby. He gets so crossed it doesn fit. I used to hide stuff like this but he remembers everything now!

I feel i tread on eggshells. He only wants me and pushes daddy away. Please tell me this is normal, that it passes (and when!) and coping strategies. I am in tears every evening. I know it is just him being frustrated.

I feel your pain!

Two young kids here, most days I'm gasping for wine 'o' clock when they're in bed

It will pass.

I have a 2.5 dd and she is driving me up the wall most days. She's lovely when she's lovely, but when she's a pain it's unbearable. I'm consoling myself with the fact that I'm 25wks pregnant and have a short temper with everything at the moment and that as soon as baby no.2 arrives I'll be calm and patient again (ha!).

You shouldn't be treading on egg shells trying to keep him happy. This just reinforces his belief that everything has to be perfect for him. If he is upset it is ok to say so, or even cry, but it shouldn't get him more than asking nicely, and sadly sometimes things won't go his way, even if he does ask nicely. Its ok to be sympathetic, but dont let small problems get out of proportion. If his hat doesn't fit dont let it be a big deal to you, just because he is over reacting. If he tantrums just ignore him until he calms down as long as he is safe.
Also try to fit in lots of attention, praise, and fun and dont let a bad atmosphere develop due to his difficult behaviour at times.

My 2yo hasn't quite got to the all-day-irrationality stage yet (there's still time!) but when he does get cross, I find the only way to deal is to let him tantrum while periodically asking if he's ready for cuddles to help him calm down. Sometimes he just needs to get cross I think! IMO there's nowt wrong with that (I struggle to get angry even when seriously tested, I just cry and simmer with resentment, so I want him to be able to express his feelings iyswim) as long as he's not destrying things or hurting people in the process. He's only been 2 for a few weeks, but it seems to have worked so far plus I can normally walk away a few feet and take a deep breath before continuing with him

My 18 month has started the tantrums, and I am trying my best to completely ignore. It will be over the silliest things like his toy won't fit inside another toy. I just drink my tea whilst reading my book or mumsnetting and pretend it doesn't bother me. When he is finished big hugs and cuddles. I think they must be so frustrated that they can't get to everything and do everything they want and their bodies aren't as developed as their brains. Expecting them to go a whole day without expressing frustration is probably unrealistic of us.

I also try to think 'remember the tantrums we had and how our parents reacted'? No? Exactly! It helps me think this won't last.

Also "be out of the house by 10am" was a good tip a girlfriend gave me, she said toddlers get antsy at around 10ish and a walk/trip to the park/toddler group/ pond to feed ducks is a good idea and it generally helps my little terrors angels mood.

I feel your pain DD is 2 and a month or so and has very good speech, however still tantrums every day. Today ahe went bananas because I have her toast for a snack and she wanted salami, true meltdown.

She is also going through a phase of not wanting to leave the house to go anywhere. Obviously we go anyway and she enjoys it when we get there, but we have to have screaming, floppiness and nooooo to get shoes and coat and out the door.so tiring and everybody else I know seems to have angel daughters who do as they're told!

Yes, our 2.2 used to love going out but its a real battle to get out now. I wonder if its the weather and cold they dont like and all the clothes they have to wear?