screaming and shouting

[sacbina]

2.3 ds has taken to screaming and shouting for absolutely everything. it's really getting me down

ds will scream for something, upset his sister, 4, who then screams back at him 'don't scream at me!'

how can I break this cycle? feel like screaming at both of them

Mine did this. "You don't get what you want by screaming" or "you can't have x because you didn't ask nicely".

Stick to it, don't let him have whatever it is he was screaming for. Mine cottoned on pretty quickly.

thanks, will try that.

when I try to talk calmly at him he screams in my face 'go away, leave me alone' and buries himself in something

I feel like I am constantly walking on eggshells, waiting for the next thing I do wrong so he can scream again
my head hurts!

This is where you decide who is boss. In our house no one screams or shouts at each other (including the adults). So screaming/shouting is treated like any other bad behaviour.

think I'm at such a loss as dd was rarely like this, and when she was responded well to boundaries

ds just flips at the slightest thing. if I say a flower is red, its not it's BLUE waaaahhh. I ask him to sit down for lunch, 'no lunch' waaahh

we have a thinking step for bad behaviour. item is removed if thrown, good behaviour praised. he likes to make mummy happy

so when he kicks off should i ignore ds? remove to thinking step? what's the best response?

When DD does this (shes 2.4 yrs) I say calmly "nobodys going to listen to you if you shout. I need the nice voice please" or "that voice is too yucky and it hurts my ears. I need the gentle voice". I find with DD I just have to keep plugging away at things until she gets the message. Its like manners, she often forgets to say please and thank you and im very consistent with reminding her every time, its the same with shouting and screaming "nobody will listen if you scream/shout/whinge. You will get things much quicker if you use the gentle voice" and she doesn't get it until she can ask nicely. If she cant then I will offer for her to go and sit in time out "ok if you're going to scream at me you will need to go and sit in time out until you can talk nicely". She hates time out so she soon sees sense and calms down.

ds finds the thinking step highly amusing. loves being in his bedroom and bed so that's not an option
for the past few months, all attempts at asking him to talk nicely result in louder screaming
I know it too shall pass, it's just sooooo tiring

loves bouncing on the bed.......
we're also currently in the middle of building works with boxes stacked everywhere. not safe to leave him unsupervised

the screaming is really upsetting my dd too....until she then screams back at him. have told her that doesn't help. sigh