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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Two-year-old in love ...

25 replies

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 10:00

My DS2 is wildly smitten with one of DS1's friends. DS2 is 2, the girl he's mad for is 5.

It's quite funny, really, but also a little weird. He talks about her all the time, and can point out her flat from four or five different routes. He is thrilled to see her, whenever ... and then has nothing to do with her. He never plays with her (she has a brother closer to his age). He sometimes gives her hugs, and that's it.

Anyone else have weird smitten children?

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Elibean · 27/09/2006 10:08

OH yes...dd will be 3 at Xmas, and is on to her third crush. First was Lunar Jim (six months ago, and big time - she would watch him mesmerized and say 'Big boy Lunar Jim' and 'blond like me' with wide-eyed admiration.
Next was Charlie, a five year old down the road (who actually seems a little smitten back). She's supposed to be friends with his little sister, but sister gets totally ignored and Charlie and dd are like magnets.
Current big crush, back to fantasy...its Diego, Dora the Explorer's older cousin. Aaaah, Diego...he rescues JAGUARS you know....

Elibean · 27/09/2006 10:09

In true teenage crush style, she now loathes and detests Lunar Jim - mostly, I suspect, because he suddenly vanished from CBeebies and dd was most put out by the sudden abandonment of cherished object

expatinscotland · 27/09/2006 10:12

DD1 is 3 and in love w/Reenan, a 6-year-old boy who adores her.

They call out each others names and run towards each other w/arms wide.

Reenan often says, 'I prefer [DD1], because she is the bonniest lassie in all Edinburgh.'

Awww!

expatinscotland · 27/09/2006 10:13

He's a LOVELY wee chap!

I think it's cute, NQC.

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 10:15

Oh, I'm sure DS2 will carry on this way. DS1 is 5. He has a fiancee, locally, with a wedding planned, with a theme [boggle]. He also has a Canadian holiday girlfriend, who is nearly 7, and impressed by his accent. (I really must remember to email her again with him.) I'm sure he'll get a new fiancee, at his new school, pretty soon, and I think I know who it will be.

But at least yours have some contact (of a sort) with their crush. DS2 just says this girl's name a lot. When we meet up (about once a week) he has nothing to do with her - she plays with DS1, while DS2 fights with her little brother.

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Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 10:17

Oh, I'm happy he's so impressed with someone. He does like some of the other kids at his co-op (who he sees every day), but doesn't talk about them like he talks about this friend.

It's also such a geographical obsession. He can point out her flat from the road it's on. Ok, fine. Also from the canal it faces, which makes some sense. Also, from another road that we can get up to her flat from. Also, from a fourth route, that we took once to get to her place - he recognises where we turned off from our normal "going home from DS1's school" route. We've only been going on that route for a couple of weeks!

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Marina · 27/09/2006 10:20

Oh, yes, NQC. Dd (3) likes to go and look at, not talk to at all mind, one of ds' classmates (7). He finds school life quite a struggle socially and has other issues, so I think it is fab she has singled him out for some uncritical adoration, and so does his mum He is a bit nonplussed but not displeased.

DelGirl · 27/09/2006 10:21

dd 17 mths 'flirts' with any man, it's cute but can be embarrassing sometimes. Most men are "dad" too. She has a photo of her real dad in her bedroom and am always saying that's daddy so maybe she just associates all men as dad. I think she goes more for the men as there isn't a man at home. I'm hoping she will find me a suitable gorgeous man soon .

Marina · 27/09/2006 10:22

And dd has asked me where exactly the boy's house is and do we ever drive/walk past it (answer = no, not usually) so I think this kind of placing of people and families is not uncommon. Your ds2 is especially keen I think because you do walk a lot so he sees his local streets in detail?

DelGirl · 27/09/2006 10:22

oh and she has a thing about showing them her shoes

expatinscotland · 27/09/2006 10:23

DD1 has this coquettish habit of going all shy around the boys. Even blushing!

At first.

Then she opens up and is the wee poppet she was born to be.

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 10:23

Yeah, we mostly bike everywhere now, but yeah, that's probably part of it, we are v local and never in a car.

Thinking about it, I don't tend to visit a lot of people, we have the co-op and school runs, and that's enough for me atm. So this girl's house is the one he knows best, outside ours, and maybe my friend with the four DDs.

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Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 10:25

It's sweet to hear of other people's kids' ways of flirting.

I found it v odd when DS1 was being followed by his Canadian girlfriend, as she was quite a bit older, but the same height. And she just followed him about with a look on her face ... I remember feeling that way about boys when I was little. It was very sweet. (Pity I couldn't stand her parents!)

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Marina · 27/09/2006 10:37

Ds met a sweet little girl on holiday this summer. Dh reports they climbed on to a smallish rock on the beach (having both checked that their parents were OK about this) and then, apparently, proceeded to have an earnest discussion about the pros and cons of a holiday flat versus a holiday caravan (dh was sitting nearby, not eavesdropping per se). They literally compared notes for about half an hour before moving on to London vs Manchester. It was 50/50 as the flat triumphed over the caravan but now ds wants to move to Manchester.

emsiewill · 27/09/2006 10:45

dd2 has a boyfriend who has moved to Aberystwyth (sp?), so she wrote a song "Is this the way to Aberystwyth?". She is confident he is coming back to marry her when she's 18, so doesn't need to find another boyfriend.

At one point her and her boyfriend and another (girl)friend were all going to get married to each other...she is a little unconventional.

Marina · 27/09/2006 10:49

Flirtations with pretty Mancunians aside, for a very long time ds was convinced he would never marry because his girlfriend in Reception returned to Moscow!
I tend to fret about children feeling they have to grow up too soon, so we've never encouraged talk of boyfriends etc, but I have been struck by how strong and deeply felt children's romantic urges seem to be from a young age.
I did wonder if ds was a bit intense to be talking this way, until I remembered the boyfriend I had in Reception until he moved away...and how much I can still remember about him, and his lovely older sisters, and his riotous fifth birthday party, and the little china deer he gave me as a keepsake...which I still have.

emsiewill · 27/09/2006 10:50

Yes, I still remember Stephen Cranshaw who I "married" in a children's wedding type thing at the Sunday School summer fair when I was 5.

Marina · 27/09/2006 10:53

Ds pined big-time for this little girl, Emsiewill, and my mother's helpful advice was to tell him to stop being so ridiculous etc. I am glad I didn't listen. The real love did take us aback I have to say.

marthamoo · 27/09/2006 10:59

Ds1's first love was a little girl in his reception class. It was doomed from the start though as he could never pronounce her name - he called her Cake-Tin (Caitlin).

batters · 27/09/2006 11:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 11:53

I don't think this sort of love is a sign of growing up too young. I think children start having romantic feelings really young - I remember being in love with a boy who lived down the street when I was 4 or so.

DS1 has had a range of interesting wedding plans, ranging from "normal" engagements to plans to marry a boy and a girl (so the kids would have two dads and a mum), and plans to marry everyone in the entire world. ("I could live anywhere!")

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Elibean · 27/09/2006 14:10

I do remember being smitten by a fellow 4 yr old called Robin, at nursery school. He was a bit scared, if I remember rightly, even though all I did was stare at him

Elibean · 27/09/2006 14:11

And my brother's claim to fame is the day he 'married' Yasmin le Bon (then Yasmin not-le-Bon), aged 3.

I think its all dead normal, and very sweet

Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 27/09/2006 18:25

Well, we had another screaming fit today because we weren't going to his friend's house on the way home from school today. Honestly, her mum is a new friend, and I think hanging out once a week is just fine! (Ignoring the fact she dropped in while DS2 was asleep today to get some knitting help!)

I do realise it's normal, before this, DS2 was madly in love with the head builder on our house, and sung songs about him all the time. He was saying the builder's name (and this girl's name, for that matter) long before he ever said DS1's name!

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Original poster

NotQuiteCockney · 29/09/2006 11:57

And another screaming fit yesterday, because HoxtonChick was visiting, with her DS and DD, rather than the magic girl. Although he was very happy with DH's DD, when they were actually here.

He is completely mad.

DH says DS2 must be in love, because he obsesses about the girl when she's not around, and ignores her when she's there.

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