What do you think of a 3 yr old using the word stupid

[twiglett]

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I'd say something. "Stupid" is our bad word. Initially because we didn't like it and I still don't. But it's also made him skip over f#ck, sh#t and d#mn -- all of which his mother says.

But I do think it sounds horrid. The downside is that you can't use it, ever, either.

ooh, agree with "shut up" but I think my son is too young for the others or the kids he hangs out with (non native English speakers) don't say that. I shudder to think what offensive words that I don't understand will come home with him.

Nope, don't like "stupid" either or "shut up".

Both are words that are banned at our nursery, along with "naughty".

But having said that, have heard DD2 (4) call DD1 "stupid" a couple of times last week, so not sure where she's picked it up - either another child at school or in the school playground waiting for the other 2.

Ooops, meant DD2 picking it up at nursery - not at school yet!

No...we dont like or use it either.

We did laugh the other day though as we were so surprised....dh was rolling on the bed and chatting with ds the other day and ds stood up and shouted 'Zitto, Daddy, zitto!!' which is 'Be Quiet!' in Italian!! We think he got it from the nursery and although it was funny to start with, if it continues, we will say something.

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I think it's hard sometimes to get the balance between banning the use of a word and kids realising it's a great way to get attention ... Or maybe I've just got this one completely wrong. DS1 learned that I intensely dislike the word 'idiot' (especially when directed at me full throttle so that the entire street can hear ) Anyway, now if he is cross with me about something, and wants to wind me up he calls me "idiot", as if to say: "Right, now what are you going to do about it?"

I never heard my parents swear either. My dad did occasionally once we were teenagers (but only bloody hell, that was as bad as it got in our house), but even today we always burst out laughing if my mum swears, it is so unusual (and then will only be bugger or bloody!)

I have always been very careful about the language I use in front of the kids, but must confess that 'stupid' is my word I use for other drivers! I get very wound up by bad drivers, and believe me calling them stupid is very tame! Ds has repeated it on one occasion I think.

I have to say I have told my children to shut up on a few occasions too. I know I'm a crap mum, but I find it tough sometimes, and it has been used when I'm at the end of my tether. Again, it has been repeated, but to be honest I think there are far more important things to worry about. I don't think they are seriously bad words.

Oh dear, am I the only one who does this? I think I'm up for bad mummy award.

Twiglett, I don't think it's that bad (and I might call things 'stupid' I suppose so I wouldn't blame my ds for using it) but I reacted when ds first said 'shut up' to me and he therefore knew it made me cross and it became flavour of the month expression as a result, exactly as roisin says. So I think I'd say something like please don't use that word, it's unkind but I'd keep it very low key. Better than a lot of things he could have come home with IMO!

I really hate it - we are all banned from using it including DH who has a habit of using it just when they are in earshot!

I also really can't bear to hear children (or parents) saying shut up!!

So in agreement with the majority I would say - I must be Mrs Average!!

Oh I should say - we do differentiate between stupid things(which are OK) and stupid people (which are not)

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jmg, i do that too!

My dd said,"stupid woman", to someone in M+S once when she was 2 and i was mortified!

She is the first one to say now that it's o.k if you're not calling someone stupid! (But i try to not use the word at all as it is just not nice for a 3 year old's vocabulary to be saying things like this-IMO)

My family make it very hard for me though as they make me feel 'stupid' at times! My dd is well spoken and when one of them says 'stupid or shut-up or bloody', my dd will ALWAYS say,"that's not a nice word".
I can see them all sighing and raising their eyes and sniggering! I get on well with them but it's very annoying.
My dad thinks it's very funny to call her a Pillock(sp) and get her to say it!(He KNOWS i don't like it!)

I have a feeling we'll come to blows oneday!

Twiglett, you're not barking, as i always say to my parents, what they see as cute now, they'll see as obnoxious in a few years-and how will the child then know it's not nice??

(sorry, i guess this subject toughed a nerve!!!)

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Twiglett

Do mention it to the teachers - any decent child-care setting would know that these sort of words, ie naughty/stupid/shut-up are totally unacceptable.

I was called a "little bu" by a 2.5yo last week - very pleasant, obviously gets called that at home!

Slinky,

What on earth is wrong with the word naughty? Am I to say to my 21 month old - don't do that your behaviour is sub-optimal?

twiglett, i'd tell the teacher about the context in which you;re son used the word as that obviously wou;d make you more concerned. (rather than him saying stupid cup or something).

Just to pick up on your comment too about interfering, i would never see parental concern as interfering

(My dd is not yet at school/nursery i must add, i have a feeling i'll not be popular)

Aha, perhaps I can be redeemed - I don't use the word naughty!