discipline

[stridersmum]

I have 3 children aged 9 7 and 5. The older 2 behave terribly at times and I struggle to find a method of effective punishment. The older one is prone to terrible tantrums at drives me to tears at times. The youngest has cerebal palsy so tends to get more attention from everyone . Can anyone give me advice on effective discipline to restore harmony to the home? My husband also works away a lot .............
stridersmun

Hi Stridersmum,

Do the older children enjoy TV or Playstation?

If yes then you caould decide on a limit for the day and each time they don;t do as they should ie misbehave, back chat then they have a warning and then if they continue they lose a minute, have a chart for this and also given their ages draw up a do's and don't list so they clearly are aware of the correct behaviours and they might start to think before acting past the warning stage.

I think bad behaviour is a really complex issue and you've not really gone into much detail at all here. Good behaviour comes from good discipline, clear boundaries, good role models etc etc. Aimed at 'younger' families but a really useful book I've found is 'the pocket parent', perhaps it's worth doing some reading to help you understand your kids behaviour. Hopefully someone with older kids will be along soon.

The one thing I do know is that if this is making you so unhappy you cry the you need some time out yourself. Do you have any evenings when you can go out with friends orto a class you'd enjoy - if yes make use of it, if no, you owe it to yourself to find a babysitter! Sorry this isn't more helpful, but just wanted to extend a bit of sympathy and support for you.

Hi

I agree with MatNan - I use the "if you carry on doing that, you won't be allowed on the computer" trick. It has the double benefit of:

1 it works
2 it gives me a good excuse not to let them on the computer as much as they want to go on (which is every day)

I agree though that your situation is more complex than the norm. My children usually play up when they want attention, which sounds a bit like yours are doing.