Terrible twos? Feel like I'm failing...

[Annie456]

I've got a DS who's 2.6 and a DS2 who's 5mo and we're not a happy house right now...I'm a SAHM (and have been since DS1 was born) and I am not coping with DS1s behaviour...towards his brother, friends on play dates, strangers in the park.
He's gone from being a sweet, funny, clever little boy to someone who I'm constantly telling off, sometimes shouting at and then we both cry...and I just want my sweet little boy back! I try talking about how he feels, why he's doing things etc. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong and it's horrible for all of us.

Is this a normal sibling reaction? Will it stop by itself? How can I change things? I just feel like I'm doing it all wrong and I'm clearly missing something...but what?

I wouldn't bother giving long winded explanations - goes over their heads! My ds had a period like this which I put down to baby dd arriving but now she is at the same age (2.4) she is the same!!

Telling her what to do in simple terms works pretty well, letting her do stuff also works well. But sometimes it is just tiredness or hunger getting her into that state so I either give her a snack or bundle her into a pushchair for a rest and she will have a meltdown, a cuddle then calm down.

She is going through a hitting phase which I try to ignore or tell her what to do instead (eg gentle or ask nicely).

Is your ds getting enough sleep? Have you stuck to his routine?