Am I messing this up? 8 month year old.

[Binkybix]

Hello

I've posted before on a similar theme when baby was younger, but have started to fret again. I'm currently on maternity leave and most days me and baby just mooch. Sometimes we go out, and meet other people and do the odd baby singing class, but mostly we just hang out in the house (mixture of playing together and him on his own).

Should I be doing more activities? Am I stunting his development? I am generally ok with my own company and don't enjoy baby groups etc hugely but obviously will do more if it makes a big difference to him.

Am I paranoid or right to worry about this?

It sounds lovely! if you are both happy why change anything? Your baby will develop just fine from playing with you and you talking to him. There is a lot of pressure to do groups and classes but I'm sure our mothers didn't take us to rhymetime or baby sensory and I know I developed just fine! Really don't worry about it as long as you are both happy.

Paranoid. Do whatever feels right.

I was like you when my son was a baby too. I wasn't a huge fan of mother and toddler groups, just not really my cup of tea and enjoyed spending lots of time at home pottering :) He is nearly 5 and extremely sociable and hitting all milestones etc, lots of friends. As long as they get the opportunity to interact with kids a couple of times a week in some capacity I don't think it matters. Do what makes you happy and enjoy your baby as you see fit, not in the way others tell you x

Hi binkybix, I could of written your post. My DD is nearly nine months and we did one group for a few weeks before christmas but I didn't carry on as the lady running it was so pushy and no one chatted that much anyway! I keep feeling like I should try another one but I just cant be bothered!

I am quite happy pottering about all day, our weekends are nearly always hectic and I have friends who call in for a cuppa every now and again to catch up which suits me just fine. During the week I quite like the peace and quiet!

There are so many cliches about becoming a mum but...I don't miss adult conversation. I don't feel like I am loosing my identity. I don't feel lonely. I don't feel isolated. I am enjoying maternity leave and being in our little mummy/baby bubble for now. DD will be going to nursery part time when I return to work so she have plenty of interaction other children.

Like aworryingtrend said, there does seem to be pressure on mums to be taking babies to all these different groups and it feels like people assume something is wrong if you don't. It's fine for those who want to have something to do every day but theres nothing wrong if you're not fussed! Aside from the free baby groups, most of the rest are a money making venture for someone, it just seems so expected of us to sign up to all these classes and groups nowadays.

I did every baby group imagineable with Dd and enjoyed it but with ds iv not done any. Inbetween running dd to school and back, housework and looking after ds I don'tthink it's nessecary at that age. When they are so young it's most importantvfor them to be with you and get lots of stimulation but as for being with other babies and mums that's only really good for getting you out and socializing to keep you sane. Children don't play together or really even pay each other much attention until they are older. We go to the park and have loveltly days out. We play at home and go in nice long walks. You're doing just fine.

The baby groups are for the benefit of the parent in my opinion. Babies get all they need from being around you. Unless you are suffering depression and becoming less responsive to your baby's needs then stay at home if that's what you're happy doing.

Apart from actual child abuse, I don't think you can mess up much at 8 months. Baby groups are definitely for the benefit of the parent (the baby may benefit indirectly by the way of the parent being saner/calmer/less isolated and bored). If you crave interaction - go to groups, if you can't face making small talk about poo and sleep deprivation, stay and home and MN-et instead.