Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Original poster

Listening and understanding

13 replies

Tarquin54321 · 20/02/2014 19:08

My 3 year old's play school have raised concerns that he may have trouble with his understanding. I think he understands fully but just has selective hearing. He is a head strong boy. He doesn't have brothers and sisters and is used to getting his own way. I want to catch any behaviour problems now before it gets worse. Any ideas?

OP posts:
LondonForTheWeekend · 20/02/2014 19:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Tarquin54321 · 20/02/2014 19:20

His speech and language is advanced probably due to child care being provided by grandparents so constantly in adult conversation. I just think he isn't used to being part of a larger group of children and having to conform with the rest of the class. I hope it is just a settling in issue (he has only had a term of play school so far).

OP posts:
DeWe · 20/02/2014 21:27

Check his hearing. It is quite common for parents not to realise and the child adapts. It may be more obvious at preschool with the background noise being higher.

AwfulMaureen · 21/02/2014 00:15

Do you find that he understands things when you're talking to him? Can he follow a two step command? For example "Go and get your shoes from the box and then get your coat"?

Original poster
Tarquin54321 · 21/02/2014 07:47

He had his hearing checked as a baby but not since. Do you think I should get this checked again.
He can follow a two step instruction but is still better if I split it up: take your socks off.... Now your trousers etc. I think we (and my parents) have only just got wise to asking him to do things himself instead of helping him or doing it for him so I think instructions is something he needs to get used to following or am I just making excuses for him?

OP posts:
AwfulMaureen · 21/02/2014 07:51

What exactly were there concerns? Is he enjoying himself there? Did they tell you anything specific?

AwfulMaureen · 21/02/2014 07:52

Their.....not there ....Wink

Original poster
Tarquin54321 · 21/02/2014 08:00

He is always the last one to line up to wash his hands or put his coat on. They have to say his names a few times before he responds. I know he gets very involved in an activity if he is enjoying it and is therefore reluctant to stop it. Equally, if there is an activity he is not enjoying he will not concentrate on it for long and wants to find something else.

OP posts:
AwfulMaureen · 21/02/2014 08:10

How close to 4 is he? In you position its hard not to worry....it is always upsetting when we feel our child is being singled out...but you should try to use your instinct here. Do you think there may be an issue? You are his best judge as well as his advocate. Does he play well with his peers?

Original poster
Tarquin54321 · 21/02/2014 09:46

He is only 3 1/4. He is great with playing with adults but still learning to play with peers (I work full time so play dates are not something we do regularly and the majority of my friends have well-behaved little girls so generally come away feeling disheartened about his ability and behaviour). I believe he excels with his language and knowledge of the world but needs to develop his interaction when part of a group. Basically I want to know if other people have had boys like this that have grown out of it or if it has developed into other problems.

OP posts:
AwfulMaureen · 21/02/2014 11:57

I don't think comparing to others is a good thing...you know your child...in your position I would go to the GP to book a hearing test firstly. The playing with others comes later for some children...but nursery flagging concerns is worth listening to. They see him differently to the way you do...of course SOME staff may be over the top and looking for differences where there are none....but nevertheless if you don't check it out, it will nag you and nag you in the back of your mind.

I also don't think the "well behaved little girl" thing is a reliable comparison...children are children and they develop at different rates. If the main worries are his listening and understanding as well as some social issues you could try doing the chat test which might show you if there is any real reason to be worried.

Remember that social skills may come later for some children so don't worry too much at this point.

Original poster
Tarquin54321 · 21/02/2014 13:10

Thanks, I've now done the chat test and it has come out as low risk. I agree about the social skills & I think I will get his hearing checked to rule it out. Feel a bit more reassured now. X

OP posts:
AwfulMaureen · 21/02/2014 15:08

That's great to hear.....my DDs teacher told me it was just like some DC take longer to walk or talk...some take longer to socialise.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page