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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

3 year old is so grumpy suddenly!

9 replies

madamegazelleslover · 16/02/2014 21:42

Is this a normal development phase?

Suddenly he's so grumpy or cross or defiant. I'm not sure whether he's tired - he's dropped his daytime nap - but it's wearing. I miss his happy face...

Any advice/tips?

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Ouchy · 16/02/2014 22:59

Watching - I'm in the same boat with my 3 year old boy, I miss him being cheerful too but he is often tied from nursery :-(

manchestermummy · 17/02/2014 14:36

Could he be coming down with something? My dd2 is often grumpy when sickening for something.

Minoush · 17/02/2014 18:48

Unfortunately I think this is a phase of development, I remember my DS being horrid between 3 and 6 and my beautiful funny DD aged 3.6 has in the last few weeks turned into the girl from the exorcist. Even having been through it before I'm still at wits end and desperately missing the happy little cherub I had :-(

Paloma12 · 17/02/2014 22:40

Second manchestermummy. How is he generally?

matana · 19/02/2014 10:05

Also watching with interest, DS is 3.3. He's become Jeckyll and Hyde. He is sulking like a teenager (the most bizarre thing to me, because he has never been one to 'dwell') - yesterday he ignored me all the way home from the CM, then refused to eat his dinner, sat on 'his' chair in the lounge declaring he wouldn't come into the kitchen to eat it (he did in the end as i refused to switch TV on for him so he got bored sulking). Sweet as anything at bedtime (DH had some quiet words with him to try to find out why he is angry/ sad). This morning he fell out with DH and ignored him all the way to his CM. Most things are met with 'no' and then when we ask why, he just says "because i don't want to". He has gone from being the sweetest and most caring/ affectionate little boy to not caring who he hurts. He told me yesterday he doesn't love me and doesn't want to be friends with me (i had to stifle a little giggle at that though). Getting him dressed is a trial - he refuses to wear anything other than tracksuit bottoms. He won't wear any of his new socks, bought at the weekend because all his others are too small. After being dry for months, yesterday he went through 3 pairs of trousers and wasn't remotely bothered - just stood there and did it. It's like he is trying to get a reaction by behaving badly. We continue to try to praise the good and, as far as possible, ignore the bad. Nothing at all has changed in his life - we have a very happy, settled home life and give him lots of love and attention. Who is this alien who has replaced my happy little boy? He just seems sad/ angry/ frustrated a lot at the moment

Sleepthief · 19/02/2014 10:40

Just came on to post the exact same problem. This is DS3, so you'd think I'd know, but I don't remember it being like this with the others although I do vaguely remember worrying that DS2 was a psychopath which he's not fortunately

I've been putting it down to the excitement at having a new baby brother wearing off after 6 weeks, over-stimulation from his birthday this weekend, which seems to have turned into a festival, and generally just being 3. It is bloody hard though, especially as I'm ill at the moment, it's half-term and I've got a 6-week-old baby.

So no solutions here, but lots and lots of sympathy!

Limelight · 19/02/2014 20:29

Me too! I started a thread somewhere else about this. My 3yo DD has a seemingly endless cold and it has turned her into a monster.

She doesn't talk to me anymore, just whines, cries, or shouts. She's suddenly refusing to go to bed because she says she's scared, she is having 7 or 8 large scale screaming tantrums per day. I'm exhausted. I don't know what's happened. I know she's not feeling brilliant but this is just so extreme.

I feel like the worst mother in the world because I was just pleased to be rid of her this morning when I dropped her off with her childminder. I miss my little girl and poor DS (who's 6) is bewildered!

I know it will stop but I'm slightly struggling today.

floatyflo · 20/02/2014 12:38

Thank god it isn't just my ds. Obviously amother joyous phase they all go through. My Ds does nothing but switch from acting like a baby all whinging and sobbing, to a miserable sulking teenager. It is really taking the fun out of everyday.

My patience is wearing so thin as am 38weeks pregnant with endless trips to hospital and facing an induction. I understand that all this disruption to his little life is not helping.

I've got to find a better way of dealing with it as I've become a shouty door slamming mummy and I'm not feeling too proud of myself tbh.

matana · 20/02/2014 15:04

I know what you mean floaty. My patience has been zapped for the past three weeks due to a mild case of pneumonia. The antibiotics are getting on top of it now, but i've definitely been more shouty than normal.

Yesterday i made sure i gave him full attention for three hours solid in an environment that i didn't have to constantly nag him not to do things. I took him to the park, then out for some dinner (treated him to milkshake) and then let him carry a big bag of cat biscuits to the till at the shop. He was brilliant the whole time - probably because i wasn't in a rush so didn't have to nag him to hurry up etc. and because i made a conscious effort to make it fun and talk calmly and patiently to him. It was a lovely evening and seemed to make all the difference. The trouble is, i can't do that all the time....

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