Constant Crying

[Poshers]

Hi

Wits end here. My 11 Week old DS cries & cries from the moment he opens his eyes to the moment we go to bed, we co sleep as I'm single & it's the only way I can get any sleep as he cries if I put him to sleep on his own.

Yesterday I was one of those women who carry their baby & push the buggy as he cries in that too, I don't want to go in the car anymore as guess what he cries in the car seat too.

This morning is particularly bad as he's even crying when I hold him (currently lying down with him now so I can have 5mins peace)

Do I just have a crying baby?

He also really kicks, scratches & pun

Didn't finish ... he kicks, punches, scratches in his sleep so in all honesty I don't sleep either.

I have to let him cry for 5 mins while I take a shower & get dressed.

I don't want to go out in public as I'm too anxious with his crying.

I had a GP appointment yesterday for a smear test (TMI!) and he yelled the entire way through that ......

Quite frankly I can't fucking cope with it, by 6:30pm when I've been kicked, punched, scratched, my ears are bleeding & anxiety through the roof I'm ready to throw myself off a bridge :( instead I go to bed!!!

So he only stops when held? Or when upright?
Does he have reflux.
Our baby cried a lot but did stop in car seat, and when held.

My sympathies. It's really stressful.

I'm not being horrible but when my dd2 was born I realised I had not really fed dd1 enough and she was probably crying all the time because she was hungry! Could this be the case?

Otherwise I have heard that cranial osteopathy works well for some.

You should also take him to the gp just to check everything's ok if he's really crying all the time.

As for Co sleeping, if it works, do it. It's v common for babies not to like sleeping alone.

We had to co-sleep for quite a while.
I found it gets a lot better when they can start to sit up.
If the crying is constant its worth checking with gp or hv as usually its just food or tiredness but could be wind, reflux, colic, ear infection etc
Have you tried a sling?

you have my sympathies, how hard. You are doing amazingly well keeping it all together.

My only advice is don't worry about what anyone else might think. Has he got reflux or something? Have you talked to health visitor?

I also found dummies a good send when mine were tiny, they do help with settling and a sling maybe instead of pram? My oldest daughter could scream in a pram/ car seat. It's hard particularly when mil tells me all babies go to sleep in them. ....

Thank you all so much :) I'm going to see of it is reflux then, I really thought it wasn't.

So, sod what people think right?

And am I right in saying just some babies cry a lot?

He does stop when held to be honest & only over the shoulder, hates to be cradled.

Don't know what I would do without this website for just support & getting it out there xx

Also do you have a stretchy wrap sling so you can carry him around whilst getting on with stuff? Like a moby wrap or a close caboo?

You poor thing. Sounds really rough.

I had a tough time with dd who also cried a lot and needed to be held day and night. Turned out she had a dairy intolerance (I was breastfeeding) and that was causing reflux too. It took ages and ages to get this diagnosis as the health visitors were useless. Even my gp failed to help.

Go to your gp. Explain the crying and ask to be referred to a paediatrician. Maybe even a gastric paediatrician. It could make all the difference.

I wish wish wish I had done this sooner instead of just waiting for dd to miraculously settle.

Good luck. Really do hope your LO settles and you can enjoy them

Thank you pocket1! You've made me feel better, as I hate to admit this but I'm not enjoying one single moment which I feel hugely guilty for :(((

My dd3 had reflux, the constant crying/screaming was hell.

Take care of yourself and no it isn't normal at all.

Yes, sounds like he probably has some digestive problem.
In the olden days, 65 years ago to be exact, my brother was like that and the GP told my mother to give him buttermilk and he was cured in a day and a half.

Also, the best advice I ever got was that when I lost patience with me baby it was better to leave her alone and go and walk around the block for a few minutes.

DS1 cried unless he was latched on for the first 9 weeks.

Years later, I discovered he had tongue tie and the poor wee bugger was probably starving.

What is happening feeding wise?

Oh darling that is awful. My lo has a meltdown once a day at the moment and it gets me down. That's nothing on what your going through. I understand the guilt of not enjoying motherhood. Sometimes I love it and sometimes I loathe it and then when he's asleep on me I feel sorry that I could ever hate it but it just gets so tiring doesn't it? Have you had him checked for any medical issue? At 11 weeks some babies still have colic too (my hv told me it goes by 4 months) so maybe he is just badly colicky. My lo kicks and kind of bucks in my arms when he has bad wind (he's 18 weeks now and still gets trapped wind which he is very sensitive to. So based on my experience im wondering if your lo has some digestive issues. How is he fed? It could be a problem with lactose, dairy (more common) or reflux. You can buy infant gaviscon over the counter which you could try giving him to see if he is any calmer. Has he always been this upset?

My DS had silent reflux and before diagnosis it was awful. He cried all the time and only Slept when he had exhausted himself with crying. In his sleep he looked like he was doing some kind of workout he was squirming so much! He cried in his car seat, in his pram, his swing. He also hated bring cradled- he preferred to be held upright/on the shoulder. So you really do have my sympathy.
I did some research and found that had pretty much fitted everything that pointed to silent reflux, went to the doctors with a list of his symptoms and to my relief she just said 'sounds like he has reflux, let's see east we can do'. The medication. Took a bit of sorting as gaviscon only worked for a few weeks. But once it was sorted things did get better. Other things I found helped were- propping him up if laid down so he was never flat, a dummy was good for soothing him, letting him feed little and often and keeping him upright for twenty minutes after a feed. Also when holding him I tried to keep movements gentle, no bouncing or jiggling.
Like others have said could also be a milk allergy.
Go to a gp and don't leg them fob you off.

I pretty much wrote your post a few weeks back and totally understand how you feel. You are doing an amazing job, it's so exhausting coping with an unhappy baby. My Ds is. Ow 16 weeks and a different boy (aside from the odd off day). In my experience this is what helped:
Pestering GP (with backing from HV) to test for intolerances and refer Ds to paediatricians team. He has since been diagnosed with reflux and is a lot better thanks to meds.
Asking good friends and family for support with Ds even half an hour to be away from the crying helped.
Getting help with my pnd (not suggesting you have pnd but my situation really brought me to the brink)
Most irritatingly time. I felt like smacking people in the mush when they continually said "he'll grow out of it". Unfortunately now he's older and has more ways to express himself and can sit up he's much happier.
Use mumsnet, it helped me so much,
I hope it improves for you both soon and you get some support. You are doing an amazing job and it will get better.