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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

1yr old no words yet- is it because I'm not very chatty?

28 replies

fourlegstwolegs · 28/01/2014 19:28

My 1yr (plus two weeks!) old DS doesn't say anything yet. Sometimes he will sort of mumble mamamamama but it's not in context. Other than that he will say a grunty "ooh" when he is excited or someone comes in.
He definitely hears me fine and can certainly understand some words.

I keep wondering if it's my fault. I'm with him all day but I'm not very good at having one sided conversations and find myself feeding him in silence etc.
Is this my fault? Am I hindering him? Or will he figure it out anyway?
He hears people talking throughout the day when people come to the house or I go out, but not much of it is directed AT him.

It doesn't help when people tell me about their babies reciting the periodic table at 11 months etc etc....

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3bunnies · 28/01/2014 19:32

Ds didn't speak until 18 months. He is 4.5 now and doesn't stop. I wouldn't worry yet.

3bunnies · 28/01/2014 19:34

I should say though it is worth persevering with talking to him , he will start to talk back. Nursery rhymes are great too.

ChunkyPickle · 28/01/2014 19:40

Do make an effort to talk to him, ask questions etc - I waffled on inanely at DS when wandering the supermarket etc., but DS was a grunter until about 18 months (and even then his first and second words were 'stuck' and 'cheese' - he didn't say mum or dad for Aaaaaages)

Like 3Bunnies, now he's 3.5 he's perfectly normal - surprises me quite often with new words which I had no idea he knew. They're all different

miniandfloss · 28/01/2014 20:04

It's fine my ds is the same age and not using words yet either (and I'm a childrens speech and language therapist so hopefully I should have some idea!). The average is around 6 words by 18 months (I say average carefully as every child is different - if there are under 10 single words by 2 I would get checked out)

Copy any noises your ds makes, babble back at him, provide a running commentary on what you are doing, label items he looks and points at - all of those things help but he sounds like he's completely normal for his age.

Original poster

fourlegstwolegs · 28/01/2014 22:32

Thanks y'all. I feel better now :)
I do actually make his noises back at him, in the same way that I sometimes find myself quacking back at a duck and baa-ing at sheep!

OP posts:

Ferguson · 28/01/2014 23:09

Pretend you are recording the 'voice-over' for a documentary video, and just say EVERYTHING that is happening, going on etc around him.

Don't have radio or TV on all the time, as he will have to compete with that. But if you are watching SUITABLE TV with him, explain to him what is going on, or encourage him to respond to events.

3bunnies · 28/01/2014 23:33

:) chunkypickle ds's latest phrase is 'oh we did that just in the nick of time', it is remarkable the transformation. He will be listening though and taking it all in. Because he was later talking when he did his language was more sophisticated - his first word was 'strum' when dh was playing guitar compared to dd1 who spoke v early with mum/ dad.

Mena1 · 29/01/2014 01:58

my son is 3 and doesnt speak as well as his peers at nursery and is doing speech therapy once a week. best advice I got was comment loads instead of asking too many questions as they will tend to answer yes and no only as my son was doing. also keep it short, like two worded sentences like " kick ball" . its short and its a comment which he will more likely repeat.

I was also not very chatty, found it hard and felt like an idiot. I also thought it was my fault. its not, so dont beat yourself up too much. good luck

Mutley77 · 29/01/2014 02:56

You sound v similar to me! My dd1 was talking fully by 18 months, ds didn't have even one word at 18 months but is now 5 and doing really well in all areas at school etc. Dd2 is only 7 months and I swear she says some words! They have all had different experiences outside the home but I have been their primary carer and if anything dd2 has had less external influence. So try not to worry, you're doing your best and we all have different strengths, chatting insanely isn't mine either and my kids are fine :)

Mutley77 · 29/01/2014 02:58

Sorry meant inanely not insanely!

MaMaPo · 29/01/2014 03:00

I'm with you OP! My daughter is nearly 14 months and she babbles loads, but no clear words yet. Still well within normal (though I can't wait for the lovely 'starting to talk' phase).

kiwiscantfly · 29/01/2014 04:04

My DD is 3.0 now and has only just started properly talking in the last three months, and I talk for Africa! She didn't say dada till one and then there were very few words till 2.2 when she finally said Mama! As long as she understood me, and could make herself understood to me or DH I didn't worry.

charitymum · 29/01/2014 05:01

This is useful tool for anyone wanting to check speech and language progress.ICAN also offer a callback service from a speech and language therapist.

roweeena · 29/01/2014 05:31

My DS didn't really start talking til 21m but he u bed ratios everything I said & would follow commands. In a couple of months the transformation has been remarkable.

Don't worry or blame yourself.

kritur · 29/01/2014 07:15

I have a PhD in chemistry and I certainly wasn't reciting the Periodic Table at 11 months and neither is my 2 yr old (must get her started on that.... ;) )
In fact I didn't talk until I was over 2.5 and I turned out fine! Agree with everyone else though, a running commentary is good if you're not very chatty in general.

Bunbaker · 29/01/2014 07:20

I think you are being a little over optimistic expecting a one year old to talk, so please stop worrying.

"and find myself feeding him in silence etc."

I find that odd. I was always talking to DD at that age, and singing to her. I started reading to her when she was very young, but I can't remember exactly when.

lollipoppi · 29/01/2014 08:48

Hey fourlegs,
My DD just turned 1 last week, doesn't have any words either just babbles a lot.
I'm always talking as have a chatterbox ds1 to talk to

All babies develop at different times, just remember, it's not like they are never going to talk, they're probably just concentrating their skills on other areas

Seeline · 29/01/2014 08:54

Encourage language skills by describing everything you see, anything that is happening etc. when you're playing together, things like 'Ooh - shall we play with the blue car?' - really basic but all help. When walking outside 'Look at the pretty flowers/trees/birds etc'
Read stories together - point to things in the pictures as they appear in the story.
Make animal noises together, car noises etc
Sing!! I am a great believer in the power of singing in increasing language skills. Perhaps your local library runs a sessions you could go along to?

UriGeller · 29/01/2014 09:00

I Think you are aware that you sometimes feed your baby in silence which Is a positive thing. Incessantly talking to a baby is good......but remember to leave some gaps so they can get a word in!

My dd is 1yo and she isn't saying any words yet. She's very noisy but has no recognisable words. I'm not worried. Her brother was talking at 11 months, saying 'ball' and 'more'. He's just about 3 now and can explain himself and his actions and is, I would say, more articulate than his peers At the moment. Kids develop in their own way, in their own time.

MyNameIsKenAdams · 29/01/2014 09:01

I found using key phrases over and over helped, like "ta" everytime I gave dd something, "yummy dinner time" etc. As soon as she learnt a word, Id encourage her to say it whenever appropriate.

I do think the more you talk at them the more they grow to understand within a short space of time. However they do eventually pick it up so really, its not much to worry over.

Dd is 2.1 and literally never shuts up apart from meal.and sleep times. She narrates everything. my ears are worn out!

Mena1 · 29/01/2014 19:26

also usefull to know that Einstein only started talking two /three worded sentences at 4 years old and only started talking properly at 9 and his parents thought he had special needs. more like he was incredibly special. also my hubby didnt talk much , only at 4yrs old and his writing was chicken scrawls ( still is mind you ) but he has a degree in maths and finance so I wont stress too much.

you most likely created a genius!

Original poster

fourlegstwolegs · 30/01/2014 21:46

Haha, a genius who hits himself in the face with the sky remote ;)

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hollyhunter · 30/01/2014 21:51

my dd didnt say anything, always had her dummy in, even when it was out she was completely silent. scary really. great big beautiful eyes taking it all in.

then one day she was sitting on my knee and i had one of those HUGE bars of chocolate. i said to each of the four people ' would you like a piece of chocolate?

then all of a sudden this little voice said ....Can I have a peice of chocolate please?

it just turned out she had nothing to say!

she has always been very shy and is careful who she speaks to, but i think its all the stranger danger thats rammed into them at nursery... they dont know who to trust

now she is 10 she mutters and sings and never keeps quiet at all

Original poster

fourlegstwolegs · 30/01/2014 21:52

Wow! How old was she holly?

OP posts:

ItsATIARA · 30/01/2014 21:56

Do chat - and if you find it cringe-making to do a constant running commentary thing, then sing songs and play games.

Is there a baby singing group near you? I found it a good prompt to inspire me to play and sing more.

Are you members of the library? Do they do rhyme time? And do you read bedtime stories?

1 year old is very young, and he'll catch up really quickly but the odds are that your baby probably would benefit from a bit more chat.

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