help....4 yo won't eat a meal/cooked food!!!!!!!!

[frangipan]

DS aged 4 won't eat a meal... by that I mean he'll eat finger type food, but screams if its cooked with the exception of chicken/bacon....

He stopped having school dinners last term and wanted sandwiches(his choice) he won't eat the sandwich tho

here is a list of food he WILL eat

fruit -not bananas/plums/kiwi
veg- all but not cooked and no potatoes!
ham
yogurt
milk/water/juice
cheese spread
crisps
bread sticks
jam
meat as long as its cold- so ham/turkey/bacon
chocolate
home made cod fishfingers

won't eat;
toast
cereal
pasta
cake
cooked vegetables
puddings-ie apple crumble/pie
potatoes ( occasionally will eat home made chips cooked in th oven) not mashed/boiled/roast/new)
sausages
anything in a sauce-gravy/bolognaise/cheese
Cheese

he drinks 1 1/2 pints full fat milk per day-we have tried to cut this down but its all he wants, and now I can see he is losing weight I am really worried- have tried to supplement his milk with f/f milk formula (pharmacist rec) but he won't drink it.
He is also constantly tired- I know school tires him out, but I mean, he sleeps anywhere

anyone else had this-DH is getting v v impatient with him

TIA

has your ds always been this picky? imo to me it sounds more about texture, cooked veg has totally different consistency to raw veg, in fact raw veg is actually better for him as contains more nutriants than cooked so you could start by giving him raw carrots/whatever other veg he will eat? Also sounds like he drinks a lot of milk so is filling up on that is therefore isn't hungry at meal times. could you:

for breakfast give fruit, followed by bread and jam (instead of toast) then yoghurt or milk after? give what he would normally have for lunch at school - sandwich with cold meat/piece of fruit/maybe bag of crisps dependent on the school's stance on this, with bottle of water.

teatime is the hard one isn't it. ideally he should eat a cooked meal, but this is tricky if he won't eat staples like pasta/rice/potato. the reason why he will be tired is because what he's eating is mostly proteen and no carbo hydrate. Can you bargain with him? as it's nice and warm at the moment this is ideal weather to serve salad, as he likes raw/cold things could you give him meat/salad with maybe warm new potatoes? say if he eats the new potatoes there will be a reward, start there and gradually build it up.

in terms of not eating apple crumbles etc, I really wouldn't see it as a problem - I don't like any of those kinds of puddings. if he won't eat that will he eat fruit salad?

will try to think of other things .. and am sure some wiser mn'ers than me will be along shortly

get him involved in food. let him help you prepare meals, kids tend to eat better if they have helped prepare their meal.

start a star chart. you give him a meal, something he would normally eat, but add something he won';t eat to it. if he has a mouthful and eats it he gets a star. when he has x amount of stars he gets a reward.

start with tiny amounts to get him used to eating it and DON'T make a big issue out of it, the more you try and make him eat the less he will eat

also, he may just prefer his things separate, a lot of children are like that.
that may explain why he won't eat sandwiches. you could try giving him a bread roll and then separate cheese or ham

You say that he'll eat home-made fish fingers -could you introduce other ingredients to these to vary them a bit,so they eventually turn into something else he'll eat IYSWIM? Veg, rice, cheese etc.

Have you tried rice or couscous? you could serve them hot or cold with things added?

thanks for all your wise words, there are some really good ides.

I will defo start a chart for him and introduce small changes. He was never picky and was given the same foods as DS1 who is nearly 7 and will eat anything from asparagus to roqufort to prawns!!!
Hairymclary- I never thought of giving him the bread/filling separatly-doh

going to try chicken/rice/peas tonight-DS1 will have it mixed together with some egg and soy sauce, DS2 will have it separatly on a plate. Have made a chart and gonna give it a go....wish me luck.

thanx all

How did it go frangipan ?
My dd is exactly the opposite, she's not fussy but won't eat anything raw apart from apples and bananas !

the sticker chart is defo working.
Also re: chicken/rice/peas.......DS mixed it altogether anyway the ate it....all!