When older ds thinks its funny to terrorise younger ds...

[Yummymum1]

Ds1 is 5.5 and until about a couple of weeks ago has got on very well with ds2 who is 3 on weds.Now howevever he gets a great laugh out of teasing ds2 and making him scream.ds2 is a very sensitive little soul and quite a gentle little boy who comes running to me when this hapens.I want him to be able to stand up for himself but dont know what to tell him to do.Do you tell them to give ds1 a kick or what?It is really driving me mad listening to ds1 saying horrible things and ds2 screaming esp with 6wks of holidays looming...Any advice would be welcome please.

I have exactly the same with my two. Ds1 is 6 yrs and ds2 is 2.4yrs and he can be really nasty to his younger brother sometimes. Ds2 is quite a mummy's boy likes his cuddles and his really sensitive, but now he is beginning to fight back even though I haven't told him too I think he has had enough of being bullied, but always has the rough end of his angry 6yr old bigger stonger brother.
At the moment we have a chart, I know, I thought my chart days were over. It is mainly for ds1 he has sad faces when he is really nasty to ds2 and if he gets over a certain amount of sad faces he misses his fav programme or has no pocket money e.t.c. but in the same context he has a happy face chart for when he does his homework well, has a wash without moaning or shouting at me and helping to tidy his room.
I too am dreading the 6 weeks holiday I haven't got a great deal of advice I'm afraid maybe someone can offer us both solutions. The chart works well some of the time for us you may find it works well some of the time for you.
Good luck

I get that as well with my two, ds5 and dd3. It's difficult to know what to do. I don't like to encourage tale-bearing, so if I hear screams and feel I ought to intervene, I always say to them 'Tell me what happened', and then 'I don't want to hear about X, I want to hear about you.' That almost invariably results in the perpetrator confessing, and, if they speak up without trying to lie about their behaviour, I don't punish but simply explain that that sort of behaviour is unacceptable. If necessary, I will have them play in separate rooms.

I think that sometimes it's an attention-seeking strategy for the older one, as he can generallyb e sure of a telling-off and plenty of attention. So that's why I try to make my response very low-key.

TBH, the best way I find of preventing this from happenign - or at least reducing the severity and frequency, is to make sure that I'm in the same room with them, even if I'm not playing with them.

Thanks for replies.Have also been thinking of star charts as previously they have been successful.However when i said to ds1 that is what we would do he said in his delightful attitude"Well I'll tear up the chart"Charming!We are having teenage attitude at age 5!!
Anyway to be positive they both sat and played beautifully together this evening for at least 45mins which I really praised up and had to tell daddy about when he got home.Long may it last!