9.5 month old falling behind her peers

[SpeckyB]

Hi

My 9.5month old seems to have slowed in her development. She does not eat, spits out anything she drinks (other than breast milk), she shows no signs of crawling, rarely laughs (only done so half a dozen times), cannot wave, does not know her name, has not mastered the pincer grip. The only word she can say is ok (no mama or dada). She also still needs to fed at night and has never slept through.

She is very good at rolling, makes good eye contact, calls and responds to the word ok, puts everything in her mouth and sits for long periods. She smiles broadly and often.

Should I be concerned? All the other babies in my NCT group seem to be streets ahead. She also shys away from contact with them, although she is happy to be held by strangers.

She can say a word? Beat most of mine by 7 months, then.
Waving by 14 months, I guess.
Pincer grip wasn't until 10 months with one of my boys.

Yes, she is affectionate. She stares into my eyes and smiles, puts up her hands to be picked up and will put her head on my chest for a cuddle. She keeps her head there for a short while too.

She just seems so much younger than her peers. I think I may ask the health visitor first. They came to observe her eating and said she had all the right skills (just wasn't hungry).

Thanks for the quick response GherkinsAreAce

I've tried purees and blw weaning. She likes to chew but hates the swallowing. Won't take any purees or even things like calpol. Just pushes it all out of her mouth.

I'm pleased to hear she's not behind yet in all things! 😀

She probably wakes at night for a feed because she isn't taking much in the day.

When my DD was 9 months old I had to go back to basics and puree again. She eats fine now.

I would ask the HV or GP for advise and don't be fobbed off with everything is okay if they can't back up their opinion. A mum is rarely wrong about their child.

I would go straight to the GP. Out of the things you list the only one that would concern me is the not eating, only because it could become a problem and may be because of something physical.

Is there any chance of tongue tie.

None of that rang any alarm bells for me. She's ahead of my kids at some things and behind at others. Don't think you worry about not crawling/otherwise getting about till 1. My DS wasn't much into eating till 1, he started at his own pace and has been prob the least fussy toddler I know. Many many children still have a feed in the night till past 1, we night weaned DS at 2, haven't felt the need to yet with DD at 17 months as her feed is so quick and no trouble. Unless it's a problem for you it's not a problem, if/when it's a problem for you you could look at night weaning. Any words before 1 is great going :)

Sounds like my DD who was very behind in physical milestones, crawled at 11 mo, didn't weight bear until 12 mo but runs rings around her peers now at 20 mo. HV referred us for physio at 10 mo because of not bearing weight or standing up - they weren't concerned about not crawling.

she also didn't eat anything other than yoghurt until 8 mo but now chomps on chicken legs.
My 20 mo son (twins) still hasn't said mama or dada. He can count to 10 and sing a few lines from songs so I'm not that worried yet!
They all develop differently and nothing you've said would concern me yet - give her time!

Thank you ladies, you've made me feel a lot better. It's so hard to voice these concerns in RL, without them becoming a constant comparison / topic of conversation.

She was checked for tongue tie when a newborn and there is no family history. The speech and language specialist has also watched me feed her and said she could see nothing wrong and it may just take time...

Does she have any teeth? Mine only ate once they had teeth. The eating is the only thing that would concern me. She sounds delightful :)

It's possible she is actually eating more than you think. What are her nappies like? Any evidence of food?

She has 8 teeth (four top and bottom). Her nappies are still the same (i.e. milk, liquid poos). The food bit concerns me the least as I suspect it will click one day. It was more the combination of factors - and the fact she doesn't laugh.

You said she rarely laughs? Maybe you're just not funny? Seriously, my dd will only laugh at her brother pulling faces and otherwise just smiles or looks a bit scathing!

I wouldn't worry too much. My Ds was streets ahead of his NCT group at 9 months but they gradually overtook him and he fell behind (he had a hearing problem) but has pretty much caught up now they are 4 - so you really can't tell too much at this age about who is ahead/behind. They change so quickly at this age. My dd has just turned 9mo and has done a whole load of new things all at once in the last 2 days having done very little for a long time.

If you feel worried have a chat with a sensible hv but I still think she sounds lovely.

My DS didn't crawl until 9 months, but then walked at 12. I honestly think there is nothing for you to be concerned about. Having any words at 9 months is very advanced!

My dd is 7 months and developing fantastically....she is full of character and mischief but like your daugthter she isn't a fantastic eater....she loves playing with food and will eat some, but resists being spoon fed....finger food keeps her happy.......and she doesn't laugh much at all. Her brother can make her laugh very easily, but she rarely laughs for adults.....I wouldn't worry x I think we just have to follow their lead......these stubborn babies know what they want and will manipulate us till they get it.......we just don't realise it ;-) . Also my daughter has said dada but she said it constantly for about 3 days when she was 6 months and hasn't said it or anything else since x