Terrible 2's, trying to be calm but still end up shouting

[littleraysofsunshine]

On those days when dd1 wants to be challenging. I find myself shouting :(

I try the soft, calm, fun playful. (I like to gentle/attachment parenting) but recently she seems very angry, and says she doesn't like a lots of things. (Tiredness does not help!!)

How else do you keep calm? I hate resorting to a higher tone. It makes matters worse.

I try the fun version of tidy up time, doesn't work.

It also doesn't help when g.parents let her do things we don't. Which effects her behaviour with us

I know this age is hard, as they're learning something new all the time, finding themselves.

I just want to be calm again and not hate myself chronic for having these bad mum data :( ( she says with puffy eyes)

I think she gets frustrated too as she's very advanced, speech is incredible. Like a five year old. She's 2 1/2.

We get out a lot. Three playground a week, and parks on the other days. I do find that the days where we haven't got much planned she gets frustrated even though we play at home.

I just don't want to be a shouty mum

I'm not sure what the answer is but you're not alone! Dd is 2.2 and some days I just look forward to bedtime . My sense of humour and fun goes on holiday. I tell myself that as long as I'm not losing it or intimidating her, me getting cross is a natural consequence of her behaviour and isn't going to do any harm, I think it's good for her to see that some things aren't ok and upset other people.

Something I often forget but try and do as much as I can is tell her what I expect - like before we go into a shop I remind her that she mustn't pull things off the shelf, and I try to give advance warnings of leaving places/ doing something she doesn't like. It helps (sometimes!).

Gosh sounds like me yesterday. Just got to take it one day at a time. Tomorrow might be better.

No magic answers. Just human!

It's incredibly difficult. I really struggle with toddlers and was a bit of a shouty mum when DD was 2, I really regret it :(

My best tips are:

If they're winding you up, walk away, go into a different room, take some deep breaths.

Try and maintain a sense of humour. Read the cutted up pear thread on here, it's about silly things toddlers do and is hilarious.

Remember all parents go through it and no one is really judging you. If they are judging you they've never had a toddler, or they've blanked it out forgotton.

REmember your DD may be very clever and have amazing speech, but she still only has the emotions of a 2 year old. Everything is confusing for them, they get overwhelmed very easily and can't DO rational when overwhelmed. Feel a bit sorry for them, poor things.

It's a very short stage in the scheme of things. 3 is a bit easier. 4 is BRILL.

Thanks. Today has been a lot better

It just one of those days where everyone has isn't it?

I just feel helpless when it's like that (not a lot) and I hate shouting. My mum use to about at me and intimidate Etc. so I will not be like that with mine. It's just when she's having a bad day, shouting, hitting dd, or just over all not wanting to listen.

But like you said, it is easy to forget she is only 2.5 even if she does act double the age.

I know it's emotional for me to see how fast it's going by. And when those days occur I get upset as I think what the hell am I stressing for? (Even if she's explored and emptied the ready break) lol

I'm trying to embrace all! And if I/ she is having a bad day. We'll just get through it somehow

Maybe she needs a couple of nursery sessions to do activities with other children? Did wonders for my toddler! I think that she was getting a bit bored of me all the time. Plus we get the chance to miss each other!

We do playground three times a week and when we are there she explores on her own or with friends. I play with her when she asks.

Nursery places are available from next September here. I'm in no hurry just yet.

Some days she goes to an aunties, or grannies so we have time apart.
Sometimes that unleashes other issues when sea home though.. If they let her do something we don't. Have a dummy in the day for example but that's an issue I need to not stress about right now no matter how annoyed I am! Lol