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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

21month old waking at night- time to move to a bed?

13 replies

Firsttimer1007 · 08/04/2013 09:07

Help!suggestions please! DH and I are at our wits end with our 21 month old DS. Since he was 1 he has been quite a good sleeper (7pm -7am and good nap in the day), but the last couple of months he has been waking through the night and wanting hugged back to sleep.
He can be out cold but as soon as you slip him back into his cot he screams again.

He has had croup this last week which has made him worse, and last night he ended up in our bed from 3-6am as he just would not settle in his cot, not coughing, just not wanting to be put down. There is a double bed in his room and he will happily lie there with one of us cuddling him.
Does anyone else ohave experience of a previously good baby starting to wake at night like this?
We have tried letting him cry it out, but he can seriously keep it up and cried until he vomits, which then means of course 3 am drama and ends up getting cuddled back to sleep.
Second point!- he is in a cot not a cot bed, but I was thinking of putting him straight into the double bed in his room? I am thinking shock tactics here and trying something completely different and maybe moving him to a bed might help him sleep better? Don't really want to buy a toddler bed when we have a double bed there but dh is worried about him crawling down under the duvet or getting 'lost' in the the bed.
Has anyone else just went straight from the cot to a double bed?
Sorry about the long post!
Ps- DS no 2 due in 2 months so would like some sleep before then!

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RainbowBrite81 · 08/04/2013 10:41

I will be watching this thread as I could have written it! We have cotbed for 20m DD but also have double bed in her room too as an option. Interested in what other ppl have to say

Original poster

Firsttimer1007 · 08/04/2013 21:03

Bumping this up in anticipation of another bad night!

OP posts:

yogafan · 11/04/2013 20:47

No advice I'm afraid, but we are in a similar situ. DD climbed out of her cot a couple of times so I took the side off - first night was ok, last night was horrendous. Terrified about what tonight will hold... Am tempted to put a mattress on the floor as an alternative to the cotbed, how are yours working out for you?

lola88 · 11/04/2013 21:00

I don't know if it would help the sleep but he's deff old enough to be in a normal bed, i don't think a double is much different from a single just more space he could just as easy crawl under the covers on a toddler bed.

Ds has been a bad sleeper from birth and seems to slip into bad habbits easily i always find a change in routine helps to get himback into better sleeping.

BNmum · 11/04/2013 21:02

Is your lo in a grobag or under toddler duvet? At 21mo my DS started waking and not settling, making nights a trauma.

After experimenting with a few options, I took away the sleeping bag, took off the cot side (turning it into a cotbed) and bought a gro clock. Hey presto bedtime is sorted and DS is back to sleeping 7-7+ . I think he didn't like feeling confined and restricted by the grobag.

Alternatively it could be teething?

Personally I would try cotbed before double bed.

Dumdeedumdeedum · 11/04/2013 21:04

My first bed was a double, I loved it because I could lie any way I liked. He won't get lost and you can always give him a small duvet rather than a double one. My DS is 21m as well and has been waking after always being a sleepy head. I think he is teething again though.

BNmum · 11/04/2013 21:06

Sorry just retread thread. Is he ok climbing on and off the bed by himself? if so and If your cot doesn't change into cotbed. Get some bed guards on the double but use a toddler/single duvet so he can move it easier and give it a go.

Bumpsadaisie · 11/04/2013 22:58

You could be talking about my DD who went through a phase just like this at about 20 mths. We were trying for baby 2 and it was enough to put the tin hat on that project!

It was about a month of waking for 2 hours plus in the middle of the night, finally conking out very early morning. We just used to put her in bed with my and DH moved to the spare room. She would wriggle and be wide awake even then, I remember in desperation letting her watch Cbeebies on my iPhone so I at least could doze next to her.

After a while - a month maybe - she snapped out of it and just starting sleeping again. I don't think it was a coincidence that her talking really took off after this bad sleep phase. She went from a few words and urgent noises at 20/21 months to being able to hold a simple conversation by 23/24 months; from baby to child, really.

We moved her to a bed at 25 months, when she was already sleeping reasonably well. No difficulties at all. You could try the bed (I don't think he'd get lost - you could even keep him in his sleeping bag) but it might not make much difference if the reason he is up all night is language development or second molars or increased hunger or getting ready to drop a nap.

Bumpsadaisie · 11/04/2013 22:59

Ps rather than cuddling, could you try comforting him while he is lying in the cot so he gets used to that?

mum23girlys · 11/04/2013 23:07

Dd3 is 28 months and started waking screaming at around the same age after having been a great sleeper since weeks old. Turned out it was her 2 year molars coming in. We just got through that around Christmas time then it started again. That turned out to be caused by ear infections. She had 3 in the space of 6 weeks

Original poster

Firsttimer1007 · 15/04/2013 11:14

Sorry for the delay in replying to your suggestions, have been too sleep deprived o get round to getting on here!
We are no better unfortunately, and now DS will barely sleep in the day either after previously sleeping for a few hours 12-2.

He goes to bed in his cot ok at night (later than usual despite not sleeping in the day) but we have now set up his bed with side rails etc, but now either dh or I will go into him and get in his bed with him.

I know we should be letting him cry it out and settle himself but it's so hard when all you want to do is get back to sleep!
It seems like all of a sudden he no longer needs to sleep at all! Don't think he is teething or sick, just a bit grumpy from being tired. I could cry!

OP posts:

Bumpsadaisie · 15/04/2013 15:22

Poor you. Its awful isn't it. And you are heavily pregnant.

"I know we should be letting him cry it out and settle himself but it's so hard when all you want to do is get back to sleep!"

No, there is no reason why you "should" do this - many parents don't. We didn't. We tried it once for three mins and DD threw up. Never again; not only did I not want the mess I found it traumatic and didn't feel it was right (for us). As posted above our daughter had an awful phase at about your son's age then grew out of it 23 months ish. You don't NEED to let him cry it out.

Given your circumstances I would just do whatever works and is easiest. If you hang in there I am sure he will get better soon. xx

candr · 15/04/2013 20:52

Am in same boat OP and have put similar post. Is so hard to think straight when toddler is screaming at 4am and DH has to go to work at 6am. Am looking at putting DS in big bed in new room too but was waiting till after holiday as he will need travel cot then and doubt I will get him in one after he has been in grown up bed. How does your DC get into their bed? DS can climb out safely but not get back in.

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