Does anyone else have a disobedient and indecisive 4 year old?

[rhetorician]

That's it really. Ignores 'stop', no and all other prohibition words. I have picked my battles. I have done pasta jar. Am weary. Usually works if there is a specific and immediate threat of lost privilege. But it would be nice if sometimes she would just do as asked. Sigh. Feel better now. A bit.

Mine too. And my six yr old isn't much better was the same at that age too.

No advice I'm afraid but wanted you to know you're not alone!

Not really looking for advice as such, though of course it's always welcome, just reassurance that she is not a psychopath in the making, and that I am not going insane...

I think it's just a normal stage - testing the boundaries or something.

If I tell dd to wash her hands before she eats something because of the germs on them, she stands and looks at me then slowly puts a finger in her mouth and sucks it. For instance.

The best weapon I have is a collection of party invites that she's received that I threaten her not attending. But, like you, I would love her to just DO IT for once.

I thought that was the definition of a 4 year old? [bugrin]

yes .

I've got round the running off towards the road by using the reins if she's in one of those moods. We all have to tread carefully around her and she often makes us late for things, her big brother was hard work but she's taken it to another level. The only thing that saves me from going insane is that everybody finds her hard work.

She's a mixture between Margaret Thatcher, Johnny Rotten and Tinkerbell.

Yes! Mine is so defiant! Thing is, he has two older brothers, neither of them were like this.

I have days where I just want to run in the opposite direction screaming.

She's a mixture between Margaret Thatcher, Johnny Rotten and Tinkerbell

This describes my dd perfectly. Thankfully she is funny, sweet, kind and utterly gorgeous as well as being an evil genius.

Really? We had a bit of defiance when she was twoish but now she mainly wants to do the right thing because it's the right thing, by herself, and I only have to gently remind her very occasionally to behave.

(Nah, I'm shitting you. Mine is the same.)

Lol
Mine is either an articulate angel or a little shxx, belligerently and rudely shouting "No!" at the suggestion of doing anything he doesn't want to. Fortunately he wants to do many things. These do not include basics such as bath time, though.
I'm
At the point of going to a child psychologist as his obstinate nature is proving to be difficult at school, too.

mummyoftheyear mine is very defiant too, splits hairs etc, tunes out all instructions, but she doesn't seem to get into trouble much at nursery. I suspect that her inattention might become an issue once she starts school though. What do you think a child psychologist would suggest? It's very hard to know at this age what is normal and what is a problem, I find. I get shot down from all quarters if I suggest that dd is in any sense more difficult than the average child. But I suspect she is. Going to read 123 Magic that lots of mn people swear by